girls with 2 or more children...

how hard is it? i have a 5 1/2 month old and im 29 years old..dh and i arent sure if we want 2 or 3..but we know def 2 and we would like them close in age..and i would like to be done by 35 yrs old.the thing is, i said i would try when my dd is 9 months old and i will be 30..and that means that i would start trying in april ..i know i would have 9 months to wait..but i need some positive feedback..im nervous..but i do want to try in april....i had a good pregnacy but a hard first 3-4 months of my dd's life.it was so hard..i need to know if it will be easier the 2nd time..lol..thanks for your help

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

I got pregnant with my second when #1 was only 11 months old. so they are 20 months apart. i have to be honest. i didnt find the transition hard at all. and this is from a person that never even held a baby before having my own. and i hardly had any help from anyone either. i still had all the necessities from my first so i didnt need to buy anything except clothes for the new baby. i think it was the best decision i made having them so close.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

I thought it was pretty easy. Emma was 2 1/2 when Jeremy was born. She was a great helper. Now they are best friends. Only down side, it took me 1/2 hour to get out of the house with Emma, with 2 it takes me an hour.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

my honest opinion is.... and don't let me scare you off..
my kids are 3 and a half years apart...when i had my second baby it was a very hard adjustment for me. i was used to running around the town freely with my one child and it was easy for me. with two it's a bit more difficult. i found it hard to get out of the house even. i cant say what it would be like having two close together because i don't know. however on the up side when my little one was like 2 the two of them were best friends and are still. they are never bored on a rainy day and i do not regret having them. now having 3 kids... going from 2 to 3 was a breeze!!

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Posted by JTK

my honest opinion is.... and don't let me scare you off..
my kids are 3 and a half years apart...when i had my second baby it was a very hard adjustment for me. i was used to running around the town freely with my one child and it was easy for me. with two it's a bit more difficult. i found it hard to get out of the house even. i cant say what it would be like having two close together because i don't know. however on the up side when my little one was like 2 the two of them were best friends and are still. they are never bored on a rainy day and i do not regret having them. now having 3 kids... going from 2 to 3 was a breeze!!

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Posted by alex7-2

Posted by JTK

my honest opinion is.... and don't let me scare you off..
my kids are 3 and a half years apart...when i had my second baby it was a very hard adjustment for me. i was used to running around the town freely with my one child and it was easy for me. with two it's a bit more difficult. i found it hard to get out of the house even. i cant say what it would be like having two close together because i don't know. however on the up side when my little one was like 2 the two of them were best friends and are still. they are never bored on a rainy day and i do not regret having them. now having 3 kids... going from 2 to 3 was a breeze!!

ya know you didnt have to scare me..my mom already did that.. she just told me the same thing..and she said that i probably will have a hard time because i will be a SAHM and i always like to be on the go..she had 3 of us..but was a home body..she loved being home..im sure that will be a big adjustment for me

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

WOW..4 kids under 5 yrs old? good for her!! i always said how the heck do people do it...i envy them...but im sure i could do it...i would have to at that point ..

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

I"m almost there....we got PG with #2 when DD was 9 1/2 months old. They will be 17 1/2 months apart if I go full term.

I think it's great that they will be so close and DD will honestly never remember what it's like to be the only one.

BUT on the flip side....she is always on the go. She is a handful, so I can only imagine what it will be like with her go go going and then the new baby needing me every 2 1/2 hours.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Honestly, I went from 1 to 2 and didn't find it nearly as hard as everyone makes it out to be. My 2 are exactly 2 years apart, almost to the day. I find I can do almost anything that I did with just 1 - except food shop because our supermarket doesn't have double seats in the carts (thankfully there is peapod). Whle it deos take longer to get us all ready, I fell into a routine really fast. And I think it helped a lot that my DD was born in May, so I had to whole summer to adjust getting out and about.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Ah, I envy you girls who found the transition so easy. My kids are 14 months apart (maybe that has something to do with it!), #2 was completely unplanned, and it has been the hardest adjustment of my life. He is almost 4 months old and it is just starting to get a bit easier. I think alot depends on the kind of baby you have as well. For me, #1 was an angel but #2 has been colicky, sick etc. Also, like someone else said, having them in the warmer weather is easier to get out and about and get into a routine.

BUt as we all know, everything is temporary and they grow up SO fast. The first year is the hardest, or so everyone tells me!

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

going from 1 to 2 was an easy adjustment fo rme, they are 3 years apart, adding the 3rd one pushed me over the edge, we are outnumbered, and bullied by our kids They rule the hous,e they are like apack of dogs It is totally worth it and beleive me if it was so hirrible we wouldn't want 2 more

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Going from 1 kid to 2 isn't nearly as hard as going from 2 to 3.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Another vote for easy transition. Mine are 22 months apart (pregnant the month #1 turned 1).

For me the first was the hardest because it was more of a loss of independence, a shock at how consuming it was. Even though #1 was the easiest baby - after those first 3 months of maternity leave I knew nothing could be harder.

For me the toughest part of having a second baby, was being worried about how the first would handle it. If you have 2 under 2, there would be only a few weeks transition before she won't remember her sibling not being in the family.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

I think it all depends on how your children are. My kids are 5 years apart but it is still hard some days as my daughter has ADHD and she can get sooo hyper, even on her meds, especially when they wear off. She then gets my son hyper.
I can reason with him more than her but it is still hard when you go out and they are both going in opposite directions and they ALWAYS both want to talk to me at the same time. We personally could not afford to have 2 together so close as we couldn't have 2 in daycare.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

My kids are alittle more than 3 1/2 years apart and I have to say the transition has been easy for me. I will admit the DH helps me out alot though. I love the age difference.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Like anything else, you learn to adjust.

I know plenty of mothers who have them 18 months apart, and it IS a lot of work,but honestly I really dont think there is a HUGE difference between if you wait 9 months compared to if you wait-say-2yrs when it comes to how difficult it will be.

I found out that I was PG w/baby #2 when baby#1 was 6 weeks old !

One advantage is that theyre both so close in age that right now we're in the bottle-diaper mode,which soon we'll be done with!
I wouldnt changed my situation if I could, but I do wish I had more time to just enjoy my 1st baby being the "baby",I feel like he had to grow up & be the "big brother" so young...so i do carry some guilt with that.
But you are still so young.....you can wait 5 yrs and still be a young mom-i wouldnt worry so much about your age as I would about knowing the patience you need for 2! Ha!good luck!

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

It's an adjustment at first, but it's not that bad... It took me a little while to be able to figure out how to balance things.

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

I went from 1 to 3. My son was 4 1/2 when my daughters were born. He was a great little helper (still is MOST of the times! ) Everything is an adjustment. But, you get into the swing of things fairly quickly!

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

wow thank you all..i think i feel better now...i figure the adjustment will be tricky at first but im sure ill get thru it!! AS MY DD CRIES AS I WRITE...

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

I think it all depends on how your children are. My kids are 5 years apart but it is still hard some days as my daughter has ADHD and she can get sooo hyper, even on her meds, especially when they wear off. She then gets my son hyper.
I can reason with him more than her but it is still hard when you go out and they are both going in opposite directions and they ALWAYS both want to talk to me at the same time. We personally could not afford to have 2 together so close as we couldn't have 2 in daycare.


I BELIEVE EVERY WORD you say i have a 5 year old with ADHD now turning 6 and a 1 Year old whomhad heart surgery my life was turned upside down twice with two children needing me day in and day out my daughter adhd seems to pick on the baby i am glad i am not alone i LOVE my two KIDS but, two sick kids are a TASK!! VERY VERY tired some at the end of the day. When they are sick at the same time No Sleep LOL Just went thru it this week your body does get use to the adjustment of lack of sleep and aches after a long day. lol

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Re: girls with 2 or more children...

Jules will be 2 and a half when this one is born. All I can say is that I have been blessed with one really really good, easygoing child and I just hope that #2 will be as good.

I have no idea how I am going to handle the 2 two and under, but I think Juliette being so good will make it easier on me. And she can't wait for her new little sister-there will be some drama is it's a boy. She has stressed her point of NO BOY-ONLY GIRL, ONLY SISTER!

But if anyone has any pointers on how to make it easier, I'm all ears!!!!