i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

i tried to do everyting the right way especally after my M/C in the summer but during teh first few weeks i did eat Chocholate ( a few days in a row i just had the urge)
I also had caffine one day b/c i was sooo tired form being up half teh night.
Could any of these things contributed to teh M/C? Please be honest.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

I honestly do not think they had anything to do with the m/c. 1 in 4 ends in m/c, no matter WHAT you do. Please please do not blame yourself. "What ifs" get you nowhere except down.

I am so sorry you are going through this, it just seems so unfair.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

i went through the same emotions...

once fertilization happens everything is out of your control. your body takes over and if it's meant to be it will be.

my doctor, trying to be funny (along with making a point) said "junkies have babies" so sometimes there is just no rhyme or reason to what happens.

take precautions for the next time, but don't beat yourself up about it!



ETA: I'm early on again currently and eating chocolate all the time ! Everything in moderation...

Message edited 11/9/2005 1:32:21 PM.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

thanks

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

Noel, Just know you did NOTHING to cause this m/c. Please don't blame yourself. The miracle of life is just that, we have no control over what happens after that sperm meets the egg.

Please do not blame yourself, I started doing the same thing with my m/c, the what ifs will drive you nuts. It's so hard right now, but it will get better

I do believe it is part of the grieving process, you suffered a loss of a child. As humans we all search for the answer and sometimes there just isn't one and it drives us crazy and start blaming ourselves.

Your angel babies are watching over you

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

Noel ..
I think its only normal that we question if it was 'something we did" that caused us to miscarry. Lord knows that when I found out we'd lost our baby, I immediately blamed myself.. I thought "I never kept myself hydrated enough" or "I must have overexerted myself" and the thoughts realy got the best of me

In the end, though, you cannot blame yourself because THERE IS NO WAY you had anything to do with the loss of your baby. Eating a little bit of chocolate or having some caffeine would not cause you to miscarry. In fact, I did cut out all caffeine and did not eat chocolate and yet I still miscarried... so you see, these things do not often have as profound of an affect as we realize. As part of the greiving process, you just have to resolve yourself to the fact that there was nothing in your control that coud have made your pregnancy a viable one

You can do only as much as you can when learing you are PG... but in the end whatever will be will be. Please don't beat yourself up about this, I promise you that you were not to blame

FEEL BETTER

Message edited 11/9/2005 1:38:19 PM.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

I know how you feel, I really do becasue I went through one myself and beat myself up thinking of all the things I did to cause the m/c (didn't help that my bleeding started right after my hubby and I were intimate). But, please keep in mind that there's absolutely NOTHING you can do to prevent an m/c. It's one of the most unfortunate facts of life, and you know from talking to all the ladies here that what's even more unfortunate is that they are just so common. My first pregnancy I ate like a saint, no chocolate, no caffeine, no tuna, and I still lost the pregnancy. This pregnancy I had caffeine, I ate chocolate all the time, even some tuna here and there. Even a sip of wine once in a while, and now I have a daughter. It's all a crapshoot that you have no control over, try to remember that!

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

I will tell you this, NO, I do not think you did anything to cause your m/c. Nothing. And you need to allow yourself to know that.
My SIL had 6 m/c in less than three years, all for no apparent medical reason. She finally is now 5 months pregnant with a great pregnancy, and the doctor just told her the others just weren't meant to be. And i honestly believe that. Hang in there.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

You did NOTHING wrong.
I did the same thing I blamed myself.
I said well maybe when i had that one caffeinated cup of coffee, or maybe that one time I accidently inhaled the windex when cleaning, or maybe I shouldnt have packed the groceries too heavy that one day.
You will DRIVE yourself NUTS!!!!!
Are they going to test the fetus??

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

NO!!! Unless you are doing crazy strenuous exercise, eating chocolate or consuming small amounts of caffeine cannot cause a miscarriage. I know people who drink a cup of regular coffee or cappacino a day and have had healthy pregnancies. Not to mention abroad they don't even warn mom's about caffeine.

There is nothing you did to cause a miscarriage and I feel so sorry that you think so. There is nothing that can come out of blaming yourself, other than feeling awful. This was G-d's plan. I don't know why, but there is a reason.

You can still get pregnant and have a healthy baby. But please don't blame yourself. You did nothing to cause it.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

DEFINITELY NOT! Please try to stop thinking that way. I think every woman who miscarries has these things go through their mind, but it's simply not true. There is nothing you could have done to prevent this from happening. I'm sooooooooo sorry you have to go through this. Please, please try to stop beating yourself up.

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

those things are no where near causitive of your miscarriage.

I drink caffeine ALOT more than you and eat chocolate ALOT....and I'm almost near the end. Since you had 2 m/c in a row (were they at the same point in PG?) that may be reason to think there is something worng.

DeniseMang m/c twice in a row at the exact same point and she found out there was a medical reason for it.

PLEASE don't blame yourself!

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

Do not blame yourself! Those things had no effect on your m/c. I am so sorry you are going through this, and just want to give you lots of

Re: i know ididnt cause my M/C but i need some reassurance...

thanks everyone

no it was not the same tiem one was 5 1/2 one was 8 weeks boith 1st trimester