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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Hitting and pushing....
How do I stop this? Do I remove him from the situation ?
He is only 17 months old so i understand that he doesnt get it.
We were at the Mall play area yesterday and evertime anyone was in his way he hit them or pushed them. I would get to his level and say no, do nice, we dont hit etc.
But I admit it was embarrassing when the other kids parents looked at me.
Did I cause this or is it a phase?
TIA
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Posted 11/11/08 9:37 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
DS does the same thing if anyone who is a stranger comes in his "personal" staff. He is reprimended and will cry because he knows he is not allowed, yet he still does it. It's hard!
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| Posted 11/11/08 9:39 AM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by dm24angel
How do I stop this? Do I remove him from the situation ?
He is only 17 months old so i understand that he doesnt get it.
We were at the Mall play area yesterday and evertime anyone was in his way he hit them or pushed them. I would get to his level and say no, do nice, we dont hit etc.
But I admit it was embarrassing when the other kids parents looked at me.
Did I cause this or is it a phase?
TIA
I would remove him from the situation after one warning. Don't kid yourself, they totally get it and are extremely manipulative at this age. You can also start time outs too. That helps.
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| Posted 11/11/08 9:56 AM |
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by shamrock124
Posted by dm24angel
How do I stop this? Do I remove him from the situation ?
He is only 17 months old so i understand that he doesnt get it.
We were at the Mall play area yesterday and evertime anyone was in his way he hit them or pushed them. I would get to his level and say no, do nice, we dont hit etc.
But I admit it was embarrassing when the other kids parents looked at me.
Did I cause this or is it a phase?
TIA
I would remove him from the situation after one warning. Don't kid yourself, they totally get it and are extremely manipulative at this age. You can also start time outs too. That helps.
I agree. Although DD wasn't aggressive (still isn't), I definitely implemented time outs at that age.
It's not your fault, btw. Every child has a different way of handling things that feels easy to them. I actually wish my DD was more aggressive!
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| Posted 11/11/08 10:04 AM |
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KateDevine
*
Member since 6/06 24950 total posts
Name:
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by shamrock124
I would remove him from the situation after one warning. Don't kid yourself, they totally get it and are extremely manipulative at this age. You can also start time outs too. That helps.
We haven't had to do it out yet, but I had to do something similar when C3 doesn't listen.
I don't know if he gets it honestly, but I did take him away and put him on a bench in my hallway for a time out and mostly I did it b/c *I* was so frustrated he wasn't listening.
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| Posted 11/11/08 10:07 AM |
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MaMaTeenie
Party of 5
Member since 4/08 6489 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
I'm sure if I search I will find the exact same post I wrote back when DS was the same age. I would tell him no, we don't hit and remove him from the situation. Just when I thought I might never be able to take him in public again (kidding) it passed. Just as quickly as it came it went away, but I think the phase stuck around for a month or two.
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| Posted 11/11/08 10:16 AM |
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pnm1654
Mommy to 2 boys!
Member since 5/05 4565 total posts
Name:
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by RyansMama
I'm sure if I search I will find the exact same post I wrote back when DS was the same age. I would tell him no, we don't hit and remove him from the situation. Just when I thought I might never be able to take him in public again (kidding) it passed. Just as quickly as it came it went away, but I think the phase stuck around for a month or two.
Agreed. My son did the same starting at around age 2. I just removed him from the situation, told him we don't hit, push shove, etc. and eventually he stopped doing all together.
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| Posted 11/11/08 10:42 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
I would remove him from the situation completely. Maybe do that for say 2 minutes and then if he goes back and does it again take him out for good.
I know it stinks -- and I've had to watch my family leave so many parties when their kids started acting up but they wanted to teach them a lesson.
I've done this once with Jack so far. He was hitting me so hard at Storytime that we up and left. He was sooo not happy with me 
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| Posted 11/11/08 10:57 AM |
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Sweets13
Bella Bambini
Member since 5/05 9300 total posts
Name:
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
DS started pushing at 20 months. We weren't sure if it was because we brought our daughter home or if it was a phase. I completely removed him from the situation after the 3rd time of pushing someone. For him, it was phase and didn't last long.
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| Posted 11/11/08 11:39 AM |
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Aga
hello baby Albert
Member since 9/05 7750 total posts
Name:
Aga
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
out of curiosity, for moms that say you did time outs at that age, how do you put such a small child in time out?
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| Posted 11/11/08 11:43 AM |
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chelle
It's a Good Life
Member since 8/06 15404 total posts
Name:
Isn't it obvious?
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by shamrock124
Posted by dm24angel
How do I stop this? Do I remove him from the situation ?
He is only 17 months old so i understand that he doesnt get it.
We were at the Mall play area yesterday and evertime anyone was in his way he hit them or pushed them. I would get to his level and say no, do nice, we dont hit etc.
But I admit it was embarrassing when the other kids parents looked at me.
Did I cause this or is it a phase?
TIA
I would remove him from the situation after one warning. Don't kid yourself, they totally get it and are extremely manipulative at this age. You can also start time outs too. That helps.
ITA....they get EVERYthing they're doing these days.
We've been teaching Bella "nice" and "gentle" with actions....especially with the dog. So every time she may seem to get rough with someone, or another animal, we say "nice" or "gentle". When he goes to push or hit...remove him and tell him "no, we do nice"....and show him what you mean by gently stroking your arm with his or vice versa.
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| Posted 11/11/08 11:47 AM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by shamrock124
Posted by dm24angel
How do I stop this? Do I remove him from the situation ?
He is only 17 months old so i understand that he doesnt get it.
We were at the Mall play area yesterday and evertime anyone was in his way he hit them or pushed them. I would get to his level and say no, do nice, we dont hit etc.
But I admit it was embarrassing when the other kids parents looked at me.
Did I cause this or is it a phase?
TIA
I would remove him from the situation after one warning. Don't kid yourself, they totally get it and are extremely manipulative at this age. You can also start time outs too. That helps.
ITA.
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| Posted 11/11/08 12:02 PM |
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by Aga
out of curiosity, for moms that say you did time outs at that age, how do you put such a small child in time out?
I had to be tough and CONSISTENT. If she got up (it was against a wall, with nothing to look at but walls, but not facing the corner) I would put her right back...and over and over again until she would sit. The actual time out (once she stayed) was only 1 minute.
If we were out I always reminded her she could get a time out. I would find a spot and that would be the spot...and again, if she got up, I'd put her right back.
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| Posted 11/11/08 12:03 PM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
Name:
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Lucas has been doing this...less now than before but still..it happens.
Our daycare teachers were really great with helping. One of them spent some time with him to sort of watch him and when he hit she would get down to his level and in a stern voice say "Lucas, not nice!" She also taught him how to do nice...he will sort of pat/rub your hand and say "nice, nice"
So we continued that at home because he was/still hits when he is frustrated or angry...also when he get's scared or upset.
I have seen him do it at daycare as well and went right up to him and said the whole "Lucas, not nice!" and then made it a point to make sure the other child was okay. That seemed to bother Lucas that I gave the other child attention because he comes over and hugs when that happens and I tell the child that Lucas is sorry.
I also repeat the phrase "hands are not for hitting" and we read a book EVERY  night about it. I swear I say that more than any other thing.
It is a very normal phase for them...but one that I feel we should work on from the start. It may take 100 times of acting and saying no in some way for them to get it.
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| Posted 11/11/08 12:49 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
when I am in that situation, I give her a warning. If she keeps doing it, we leave, period 
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| Posted 11/11/08 12:50 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by Aga
out of curiosity, for moms that say you did time outs at that age, how do you put such a small child in time out?
I started TO when miki was 13-14 months
I would take her and place her with her back to the wall and walk away...if she got up, I placed her back in TO...eventually she got it, now she just cries, but she does not get up from TO
It is hard but they DO get it and with my dd, it DOES work
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| Posted 11/11/08 12:51 PM |
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LisaM
LIF Infant
Member since 1/08 63 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
My DS recently grew out of his biting phase and has moved into the hitting phase. He's 23 months. He hits mostly when he's mad but sometimes for no reason ( I think it's for a reaction). He hits me and when he does I tell him it's not not and we don't hit. If he does it again, he goes in time out and has to say sorry. According to his daycare his group of early 2's (all boys) are a group of biters and hitters--- LOVELY :) Hopefully this is just a phase like you said, but it is mortifying when he does it and I dread him being with certain children b/c I know their parents look at him like a "bad" kid. Most moms of 2 or more understand that it's a phase and it's not your fault. Hope your phase goes by quickly...but believe me I know what you're feeling to a T. I'm not a big time posted, but let me know if you want to talk!
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| Posted 11/11/08 1:41 PM |
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SofiaBella
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/07 785 total posts
Name:
Vanessa
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by Aga
out of curiosity, for moms that say you did time outs at that age, how do you put such a small child in time out?
I got a circle mat from the target dollar section & she always gets a warning 1st. Then if she still doesn't listen I get the mat from her closet & put it down in the corner section of our hallway (she can't see the TV from there)
Then I tell her she has to take a time out & I always tell her why. After the 1st time she has never gotten up off the mat, she usually just sits there & whimpers. Then after 1 minute goes by . I go to her & tell her no more whatever she had been doing & I ask her to say sorry - she usually hugs & kisses me. I've only had to do timeouts a few times. Usually the warning alone works now. She is quite a tester though.
ETA: we started timeouts around 16 months
Message edited 11/11/2008 1:50:23 PM.
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| Posted 11/11/08 1:49 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Hitting and pushing....
Posted by Aga
out of curiosity, for moms that say you did time outs at that age, how do you put such a small child in time out?
I would put him in his PNP without any toys or distractions and leave the room (of course I would watch him on the monitor).
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| Posted 11/11/08 1:51 PM |
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