Advice needed, please. Not sure if I should be posting here??

Hi everyone, I don't post here very often, but I have a situation and need some help.

A family member had been trying to get pregnant for some time and finally conceived twins. She was about 19 weeks and out of nowhere began bleeding and lost one of the babies (both girls). Now, the second baby has only a 20% chance of survival (not sure of the details, but her cervix seems to be the problem). So... we would like to send her a gift as she is in the hospital on bedrest for the duration. My MIL suggested getting a pregnancy calendar to track the baby's progress, but the rest of the family thinks this is a bad idea since the odds are stacked against the baby making it My MIL thinks we shouldn't dismiss the fact that there is a growing baby inside and that we should be positive and embrace the pregnancy.

Anyway, thoughts?? We don't want to offend or upset anyone. Since this is a sensitive situation, I figured some of you may personally know or know someone who could advise us. TIA!!!

Re: Advice needed, please. Not sure if I should be posting here??

I don't have any experience with this but I agree with the family - the pg calendar could completely backfire. Is she on bedrest? I would get her comfort items, things to help her pass the time, keep her company - she's mourning a loss and may need an extra shoulder to cry on. I am really sorry your friend has to go through this.

Re: Advice needed, please. Not sure if I should be posting here??

First, for

I agree with the PP, the calendar is a bad idea because it's just a reminder that the baby might not make it that far. She'd prob appreciate some things to make her hospital stay a bit more comfortable.

Try posting this on the Pregnancy board, I think you'd get more responses over there.

Re: Advice needed, please. Not sure if I should be posting here??

I wouldn't get the calendar.
What's more important than what you get her is spending time with her.
When you are with her, you will see what she wants/needs - whether its books or movies or magazines, etc.
But if she is stuck in the hospital, your company is the best gift ever.