Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

My mom who watches DS (20 months) told me that my son reacted a bit crazed when she was holding my new cousins baby. My mom and DS went over the house to visit the new baby and when my mom had the baby in her arms my DS screamed ran in a circle screaming then fell down from all the upset still screaming. Once my mom passed the baby back to the mom DS got up and went along playing.

I have four more weeks to go until 2nd baby comes along and I'm really nervous that my DS is going to be difficult.

Does anyone have any advice, what did you do, how did your DC act with the new addition?

Re: Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

When my sister brought my second niece home my older niece got jealous when I held the new baby and a little bit when my mom did (though not quite the same as your DS and she was little bit older --she was almost 3).

Anyway when I would hold her little sister she would tell me to put her on the table or give her back to mommy. So I started letting her help me hold the baby and as soon as I would hand the baby back to someone else I would go play with her so she would realize that I was giving her up for her new sister. It was never terrible and didn't last too long. Once she realized that she got further with being helpful and kind she took to the new addition and now almost two years later they are best friends.

You may be surprised that when the new addition "belongs to them" they are less jealous.

Re: Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

I think we are going to go through this soon too. I just picked up a book for DS on becoming a big brother and will incorporate it into his bedtime reading tonight.

Re: Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

DD would get very jealous whenever I held a baby but was fine when I brought home her brother and still is today. I make a BIG deal about her being the big sister from when I was pregnant and even now. She is so proud that is the first thing she tells people before she even tells her name!

Re: Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

the only thing i could think is getting a baby doll... and explaining how your going to have a real baby soon...use it as practice

Re: Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

Posted by CkGm

DD would get very jealous whenever I held a baby but was fine when I brought home her brother and still is today. I make a BIG deal about her being the big sister from when I was pregnant and even now. She is so proud that is the first thing she tells people before she even tells her name!

Re: Nervous here...Need advice on how to deal with introducing jealous 20 month old to their new baby brother or sister?

We are going through it right now. My DS is 20 months and the baby DS is 2 months. my older son gave us such a hard time. He is so jealous. We have tried everything. We make him involved. We give him lots of attention. We still have our special things we do with him but he still gives us a hard time. He is now hitting the baby. if anyone does give advice we could also really use it.

The cute thing is that my older one says goodnight to the baby and good morning everyday. I guess deep deep down he is happy.