Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by annoyedTTCer

Posted by Mimi25

Posted by colette

Calling someone's mother a c**t in a mutual act of road rage -- with your IN YOUR CAR -- puts that child in imminent danger and it is NOT OK. Did you honestly expect kudos for that?

"Did I say things out of anger? YES. Not everyone is able to control their anger in situations, especially given certain circumstances. It’s always easy to say what you would have done, if you were there, but you weren’t. Do I regret some of the things I said – yes I do and I apologize for that."

ETA: It wasn't ok for him to call me that in front of my
- I am her mother

Not a proud moment, but can't take it back.

You have nothing to apologize for.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

I only saw your thread from last week and didn't get involved because of the drama.

Anyways, I can understand our anger getting the best of us. I was in the Target parking lot earlier today and some chick almost backed her car into me and my son because she wasn't looking. My first response was to yell at her to look where she was going and I do admit a curse came out. She then reacted to that and almost hit another woman. It could've gotten pretty bad, and I am sure it was just because she was not paying attention, but my response caused her to react again even more negatively.

I think we can ALL often learn that anger often can lead to dANGER.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

I try to stay away from drama threads myself, But i do want to wish you the best in everything ,We're not perfect and everyone says things they dont mean, But you need to becareful of what you say behind the wheel, You just be who you are and only your "True" friends will stand by you. I'm not perfect i admit it , I might get mad behind the wheel but i try to count to 10 to myself than i feel better... When you see other drivers or people and they get angry just pretend you didn't hear them, Yes not easy to do, But with time it gets easier. Good luck!! We all say things that we regret but we learn from our mistakes and in time hopefully everyone will see the person you are 'NOW' not the person you were than.

Message edited 9/11/2009 9:17:40 PM.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by luvsbob4603

I try to stay away from drama threads myself, But i do want to wish you the best in everything ,We're not perfect and everyone says things they dont mean, But you need to becareful of what you say behind the wheel, You just be who you are and only your "True" friends will stand by you. I'm not perfect i admit it , I might get mad behind the wheel but i try to count to 10 to myself than i feel better... When you see other drivers or people and they get angry just pretend you didn't hear them, Yes not easy to do, But with time it gets easier. Good luck!! We all say things that we regret but we learn from our mistakes and in time hopefully everyone will see the person you are 'NOW' not the person you were than.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Message edited 9/12/2009 9:22:26 AM.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by Bxgell2

Posted by Mimi25
Not everyone is able to control their anger in situations, especially given certain circumstances.

I don't think this is a good enough excuse - if you have a problem controlling your anger, particularly in the one you described, then you have a REAL problem that needs to be addressed and worked on, for the sake of your children. The way that you responded to that man was completely inappropriate no matter what the situation, but especially so considering your child was in the car. Not only that, your temper blinded you from the fact that your actions placed yourself and your child in imminent danger.

I'm not flaming, I'm just trying to explain that this is no flippant matter - your actions bespeak an out of control temper that will very directly affect your children, and may put you and them in harms way in the future. If you have a problem controlling your temper, then you really should seek help

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by munchkinfacemama

Posted by colette

But that my dear, is the reason that anger management therapy exists. Perhaps you should look into it, before that child becomes an unwitting victim and you have a TRAGEDY on your hands. 2 guarantees I can make you: no apology will suffice if your daughter is hurt, and you are 100% GUARANTEED to meet more imbeciles out there on the road. Infer what you will.

Well said. I was a family law attorney in NY and I can't tell you how many of these incidents turn into violent tragedies. I also cannot tell you how to live you life, and while in theory, it is great to biotch someone out, you could have gotten your or yourself killed. In my book, you don't get kudos for that. What would you have done if he had a gun and shot your for your mouth? Moving on...

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

I havent read any of the posts and truthfully, I have seen enough here that I don't need to.

I will say this though. I once posted about an incident in which I honked my horn and I flipped someone the bird while driving because they were driving recklessly and nearly hit my car while I was on my way to work. A police officer pulled me over soon after. He asked for my license. After seeing that I did not live in the vicinity of where I was at the time, he advised me NEVER to do that again because I might not be so lucky the next time. I work in a VERY VERY VERY dangerous neighborhood where violent crimes happen very often. The closest hospital to where I work is known for its trauma center and treats gunshot wounds too frequently.

He was right, I was stupid. REALLY stupid. I seriously endangered myself and my passenger (who is my sister). I learned from that and even though I do get just as angry, I curb that anger and flip the bird under the dashboard where nobody can see it, but I get it out of my system.

As far as cursing in front of children - I never do it. I am strongly against it and I find it unacceptable behavior from adults. Some do not share my views and frankly I don't care, but I grew up in a household where there was no cursing and if someone slipped, they got cracked across the face. Needless to say, I was never hit. If my one year old is already mimicking the word "stop" when I say it, who is to say she wouldn't mimic if I were to drop the f-bomb. She could.

I hope you are able to resolve any issues of anger you may have and I hope you are able to be a productive member of these boards. Good luck to you.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by Bxgell2

Posted by Mimi25
Not everyone is able to control their anger in situations, especially given certain circumstances.

I don't think this is a good enough excuse - if you have a problem controlling your anger, particularly in the one you described, then you have a REAL problem that needs to be addressed and worked on, for the sake of your children. The way that you responded to that man was completely inappropriate no matter what the situation, but especially so considering your child was in the car. Not only that, your temper blinded you from the fact that your actions placed yourself and your child in imminent danger.

I'm not flaming, I'm just trying to explain that this is no flippant matter - your actions bespeak an out of control temper that will very directly affect your children, and may put you and them in harms way in the future. If you have a problem controlling your temper, then you really should seek help

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

All I have to say is, I was appalled by that post. Not just because of the danger you invited, but also the message you teach your child by reacting in that way. As parents, our jobs are to make our kids better than we are, in my opinion. Not the same.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Way before I had DD........

I was driving on one of the parkways in a Dodge Ram....pretty big azz truck. This guy cut me off, big time. Being young and stupid I decided to ride his azz as payback.....my truck was MUCH bigger than his. He then proceeded to take his club and wave it in the air, like he was gonna throw it at me. I backed off right away. People are CRAZY!! He easily could have thrown that and kept going while I got into an accident. Thank God he didn't, but you never know!!

ALWAYS think twice when dealing with people like this, especially when you have a child with you! You have to realize this about yourself and move forward knowing that you will not put your child in jeapordy like that again.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

I am not going to comment on ANYTHING else except tell this story..

A few weeks ago, a friend of my brothers was coming over the 59th street bridge. Off duty cop..was with his sister and cousin. He was cut off by a car with 2 guys and another girl in it. He cursed them out, gave them the finger and tail gated him until the car sped up. Anyone who knows the LIC exit knows you come around a bend and cant see anything before that.

Apparently that car stopped and my brothers friend literally had to stop because they were blocking the way. He got out of the car because his drunk cousin was screaming at them..he wasnt going to fight or anything else, just try to keep the peace. Instead he got beat with a tire iron in the face..by 2 men and one woman. Beat him so bad, hes unrecognizable. So many surgeries already..and hes still not conscious. Other car took off..never to be found.

So...although our anger may get the best of us sometimes, just think of the stories that have been told. It's really dangerous out there.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by Smileyd17

Honestly, im not on here enough to remember all about you and what happenened on here.

I did read the recent incident (with the road rage) and although its not something I would do or felt it was appropiate behavior, I wont come on here to bash you about it or bash anyone on this board because I didnt agree. Hence why you never see me respond on a "drama" started thread.

I actually feel sorry that you get bashed.
Sorry that you do.

I wish you the best

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Message edited 9/12/2009 1:57:05 PM.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by mrslobo2007

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Not a huge poster, but this to me seems like typical LIF stuff..."I'm leaving, no I'm not...beg me to stay please". I know that sounds bitchy, but whatever.

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by june262004

Posted by mrslobo2007

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Not a huge poster, but this to me seems like typical LIF stuff..."I'm leaving, no I'm not...beg me to stay please". I know that sounds bitchy, but whatever.

Oh Ive been around since 2003 between LIF and LIW had a few thousand post It's the norm!

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by mrslobo2007

Posted by june262004

Posted by mrslobo2007

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Not a huge poster, but this to me seems like typical LIF stuff..."I'm leaving, no I'm not...beg me to stay please". I know that sounds bitchy, but whatever.

Oh Ive been around since 2003 between LIF and LIW had a few thousand post It's the norm!

Oh no!!! I wasnt referring to you...I was referring to the OP!! Sorry about that!

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by june262004

Posted by mrslobo2007

Posted by june262004

Posted by mrslobo2007

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Not a huge poster, but this to me seems like typical LIF stuff..."I'm leaving, no I'm not...beg me to stay please". I know that sounds bitchy, but whatever.

Oh Ive been around since 2003 between LIF and LIW had a few thousand post It's the norm!

Oh no!!! I wasnt referring to you...I was referring to the OP!! Sorry about that!

oh I know... Im saying thats the normal leaving beg me to stay

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

Posted by june262004

I haven't been an active poster for at least 9 months and I see it's still the same LIF

Were you ever really hiding? I knew it was you from the begining

Re: I'm not hiding anymore

First, I 100% agree with Beth and Liza's posts above. If even half of what you post here is true, you have a serious, serious anger management problem and you need professional help as soon as possible -- for your sake and the sake of your children. If you're going to consider that bashing, so be it. I call it like I [read] it. I hope you'll take very seriously the recommendations everyone has given here for you to get some help managing your anger. You keep trying to explain this stuff away as if it is normal to react this way when angry. I'm serious when I say that your behavior out of anger is not normal, and I really think you need anger management therapy.

Second, starting threads like these while at the same time saying you're not seeking attention is like screaming at the top of your lungs, "I'M NOT YELLING!" Perhaps you're not aware of how your posts come off... but you really need to start thinking about exactly what you're putting out here. LIF is not a safehaven on the Internet -- ANYONE can read what is posted here, and as far as I can see, anyone can get an account and respond. When you post the stories you do and details about your own inappropriate behavior, any ensuing drama shouldn't take you by surprise. I'm not defending anyone who flamed you nor am I condoning mean behavior -- but you're not a stranger to Internet bulletin boards. I think you need to consider how much of this stuff you post publicly if you're going to get really, really bothered by people's (predictable) responses. Their responses may not necessarily be right and some are downright mean and inappropriate, but you can't claim to be taken by surprise by people's reactions to your stories about your behavior. If you ARE surprised that so many people find your behavior dangerous and inappropriate, then you need anger management counseling even more than I initially thought.

I wish you the best of luck - I really do. I am not trying to be mean or nasty to you -- I really believe that you need some serious counseling (and your older child might as well given when your DC has been through and probably witnessed of your own behavior). I'm not a parent, but I am around children enough to know that they are like sponges. Every second you are with your children, they are learning from you. Be careful what you teach them.

I hope you get the help you need -- and know there is no shame in seeking help like this. In fact, acknowledging that you have a problem and you want to change for your sake and your children's sake would be commendable - admirable even.

Good luck to you.