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Really? Already?

Posted By Message

CorT530
LIF Zygote

Member since 9/09

17 total posts

Name:
Corinne

Really? Already?

We just got married in May and already our families are starting in with "when are you going to have babies?". It's so d*mn annoying especially since we aren't sure if we will have children. DH is more about the "kid free" life than I am but at the same time I can't justify why I really want to have children (I know that sounds sh*tty)
Growing up it was you get married and have kids and live happily ever after. So much has changed since I was a child that I'm starting to now realize that I don't have to live my life doing things the way everyone/society expects me to. It's a huge responsibility thats quite scary when you think about it.
MIL is a little on the religious side - she feels that this world is way too messed up to bring a child into it but she's not pushing anything. I agree to an extent but on the other hand its all how you raise your children in my opinion. Then I see my precious niece and think "how could I not have children?"
We are nowhere near being ready to start a family (if we decide to). I just feel like everyone's in such a rush for us to have kids. I can't even imagine telling them that we may not decide to have kids, they'll all have hissy fits and that's just something I SO don't want to deal with.
Is anyone else getting this sh*t from their families too?

Posted 9/28/09 2:40 PM
 

Blazesyth
*yawn*

Member since 5/05

8129 total posts

Name:

Re: Really? Already?

I was asked on the reception line at my wedding.

Posted 9/28/09 2:47 PM
 

Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st

Member since 5/05

15287 total posts

Name:

Re: Really? Already?

It's the way people are - when you are single, when are you going to meet someone?
When you meet someone, it's when are you getting engaged?
When you get engaged, it's when's the big day?
You get married, when are you going to "start a family" (that's a nod to Kara's thread).

I was always pretty decisive about this area in my life so for the most part I didn't get asked too much. While it's no one's business, I found it easier to just be direct with my reply. For me it was simple but if you (general you) don't want to discuss your choices - then just say that. Make it so there's no need for people to keep asking.

You'll know when you know and until then just tell people to sit on it. Chat Icon
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Posted 9/28/09 8:07 PM
 

MrsKelly
just hangin' around...

Member since 11/06

6305 total posts

Name:
Krista

Re: Really? Already?

you are not alone, my dear. i feel like with the people we are in contact with in our everyday lives, it dies off after a while... but with extended family and such, i cringe every time there is an event because you just KNOW it's going to be "so when are you two going to have a baby?" i have never said "maybe never!" - but i think about it! i'm pretty sure that would for sure make them think before they speak again! it makes you wonder sometimes... does everyone just assume everyone else wants or is capable of having children?!Chat Icon

Posted 9/28/09 9:28 PM
 

anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!

Member since 7/06

10082 total posts

Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!

Re: Really? Already?

It will ONLY start to subside after you have been married like 7 years or more-- they kind of give up on you!! Chat Icon

Posted 9/29/09 12:48 PM
 
 
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