What makes a good parent?

This is for anyone, but I'm interested especially in the parents that post here.

In the years since I've made the decision to lead a childfree life, I've been told many times by a lot of different people that I "Would be a great parent" or that I'm good with kids. I'm not patting myself on the back, it's just a fact. I generally enjoy children and they enjoy me in return.

I often wonder what people base that on. The comments come from family, friends and acquaintances.

If you could ever see yourself telling someone they would be a great parent, what do you think qualifies them? I lurk on Parenting sometimes and the amount of work and decisions that go into being a parent boggles my mind. The myriad of things you go through makes me think that no one can really say if anyone is going to be a great parent or not.

I do ask them sometimes, and say - "Even though I don't actually want them, you still think that would make me a great parent?" I think that uniquely qualifies me as a bad parent, that I don't want them in the first place.

Re: What makes a good parent?

when i see a great parent i see someone who is active in the child's life but not obsessive. I think hover parents are just as bad as neglectful ones. A parent who takes time for them self, their partner and their child not just the child. Someone who turns everything into a lesson - keep teaching and molding and just don't expect your kid will understand life lessons on its own.

Re: What makes a good parent?

All of my friends that are GREAT parents are PATIENT and not so over bearing and crazy.

That's why I get the comments too...but I don't have to be over bearing as a step parent so it's easy..I get to send them back hee

Re: What makes a good parent?

alot I feel,

be a mother not a best friend, unless they are way older.


know they will test your boundaries---no is no is no...if u give in..u are in for it.

never tell your kidswhom to be friends with--we never listened, why should they? they have to learn.

be willing to have fun, act like a *** and do things to create tradition and memories.

always--call, check up, give curfews, is there a parent home? Ii have not met them put them on the phone--do drivebys..
not that u do not trust them, it's because u care-a careless accident might not give u a second chance. They might be embarassed but they will realize it's out of love.

Make them realize when u r little a friend is a dime a dozen, be nice, treat them the way u would want to be treated but be friends with EVERYONE.

Always stick up foor the underdog or the person that is disabled or shy.

Do not teach color or differences..

it's a pita but let them sleep and be at your house as much as possible, noone will treat your kids or watcvh them like you do--and it's loud but them all wanting too be there is a compliment.

I have a ton more I can add but this is what immed comes to mind.



oh one more vimp" start early..do good deeds, toy drives, soup kitchen church etc..never ever forget that not all have it the same way but they are not less important, as we say...PAY IT FORWARD-IT WILL NEVER MAKE U FEEL ANYTHING ELSE BUT FANTASTIC..
mind u--u can do all this and still hit teenage years where they just consider u a freak but they come around. :)

Message edited 7/13/2010 10:54:36 PM.

Re: What makes a good parent?

my bro & SIL are awesome parents (IMO) and here's why..

they set boundaries
they teach manners...please, thank you, may i be excused
they teach respecting each other, especially importance of family and helping each other
they teach the value of a work ethic and doing well in school
my SIL is a SAHM which i feel has had a big impact on the kids
and they laugh with the kids alot...

Re: What makes a good parent?

IMO a good parent is

Loving
Patient
Kind
Understanding
Willing to put the effort in
Willing to set limits (that's part of parenting)
Teach
Dedicated
Have fun
Willing to compromise and make sacrifices
Etc...

I have never met you but the way you talk about your dog for example would make me think you would be a good parent. I am ready to be "bashed" on that one. Comparing kids with dogs! But in essence, training a putty is "almost" the same as with a child. It's patience, love and dedication/commitment.

Re: What makes a good parent?

I feel like I am going to answer this question a bit differently than many of the PP.

If I were to tell someone that I think they would make a great parent, it would probably be someone who I see gravitate towards the kids at family or social functions. The people who would rather hang out and play with the kids than sit around and talk to the adults.

The people who don't take themselves too seriously and can laugh at a lot of things, including at their own expense.

These are the people who I might think to myself would make a great parent. Doesn't necessarily mean that I would be right... I always thought I would make a great parent, and now that I am one and see how hard it is, I question how good I actually am at this!

Re: What makes a good parent?

Thanks guys

I have to say, I'm surprised the lurking parents haven't weighed in more here, considering they're uniquely qualified to answer the question.

Posted by smdl

I have never met you but the way you talk about your dog for example would make me think you would be a good parent. I am ready to be "bashed" on that one. Comparing kids with dogs! But in essence, training a putty is "almost" the same as with a child. It's patience, love and dedication/commitment.

Re: What makes a good parent?

Posted by jerseypanda

I always thought I would make a great parent, and now that I am one and see how hard it is, I question how good I actually am at this!

Re: What makes a good parent?

I know I don't "know" you, but from what I see you post on here, you seem like a kind, patient and understanding person, all qualities that make a good parent.

I think one also has to have the ability to make their children a priority and have the ability to make sacrifices for them. I also think you really should love children to have them. I have met some parents who I think really don't like kids in general all that much. Aside from being around your own kids, you have to expect to be around their friends, too.