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snowflake09
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1076 total posts
Name:
Jillian (Bean08)
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Having a sad day..
And I don't know why, really. But, I thought writing might make me feel a bit better. For some reason, thinking about Sarah has been getting to me a lot lately. It seems as though as soon as I start to think about her, and everything that happened, my eyes just fill with tears. It can completely come out of nowhere...and today is just one of those days. DH's father is in the hospital, so I haven't brought up my feelings of sadness to anyone, since I feel like right now I need to be the stronger one...
Thanks for reading ladies and letting me vent...I hate that we all have experienced heartbreak in such unimaginable ways.
Hope you are all doing okay today 
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Posted 6/29/11 2:49 PM  |
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kathleeng
Member since 5/05 3775 total posts
Name:
Kathleen
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Re: Having a sad day..
So many .
We are here. I completely know what you mean. There are some instances where I think of my son and the sadness is so overwhelming I wonder how I can get through it. Like today I heard a song today at the gym that reminded me of Liam and I was overcome.
Just know you will get through these hard times cause you HAVE. And you WILL. It is ok to have these rough days they are normal. Especially if you are dealing with "trigger days" ie birthdays, anniversaries etc.... Do you belong to a support group that is open on a drop in basis? We had one that we went to monthly in the beginning. We don't really go monthly anymore but we "checked in" a few months ago. It was almost if we were doing ok for awhile but then "fell off the wagon". It was helpful to us and was what we needed. Sometimes you just need the support of those that know exactly what you are going through.
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| Posted 6/29/11 3:23 PM |
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Melissa1013
My sweet boy
Member since 1/08 1933 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Having a sad day..
Sending you many .
Tomorrow will be a better day. I know it's hard when we feel like we need to be "the strong ones". If you need to talk or vent or anything I'm here.
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| Posted 6/29/11 3:36 PM |
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snowflake09
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1076 total posts
Name:
Jillian (Bean08)
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Re: Having a sad day..
Posted by kathleeng
So many .
We are here. I completely know what you mean. There are some instances where I think of my son and the sadness is so overwhelming I wonder how I can get through it. Like today I heard a song today at the gym that reminded me of Liam and I was overcome.
Just know you will get through these hard times cause you HAVE. And you WILL. It is ok to have these rough days they are normal. Especially if you are dealing with "trigger days" ie birthdays, anniversaries etc.... Do you belong to a support group that is open on a drop in basis? We had one that we went to monthly in the beginning. We don't really go monthly anymore but we "checked in" a few months ago. It was almost if we were doing ok for awhile but then "fell off the wagon". It was helpful to us and was what we needed. Sometimes you just need the support of those that know exactly what you are going through.
Thank you so much Kathleen. The feelings sometimes are just so overwhelming...
We have gone to a group before - I actually wonder if it's the same one you have gone to. The one we've gone to is in Farmingdale. I haven't gone in a while - partly because I have been taking care of Katelyn, and also, partly because I have been afraid of how other people there will perceive me, now that Katelyn was born. But, I have been thinking that I'll try to go in August when they have the next one. I really feel like I just need to go to be around people who really do understand...
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| Posted 6/29/11 4:14 PM |
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snowflake09
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1076 total posts
Name:
Jillian (Bean08)
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Re: Having a sad day..
Posted by Melissa1013
Sending you many .
Tomorrow will be a better day. I know it's hard when we feel like we need to be "the strong ones". If you need to talk or vent or anything I'm here.
Thank you Melissa. And you're right - tomorrow will be better.
I have been trying to write something for the site you shared on here, but for some reason I just haven't been able to do it. In April, I spoke at a remembrance ceremony that Good Sam had, and I just felt like what I wrote wasn't good enough, and I have the same fear with writing for the site. I think I just need to realize that whatever my feelings and words may be, they are true and sincere. Sometimes it really is just so hard to really grasp what we have, and will always, go through...
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| Posted 6/29/11 4:16 PM |
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missliss
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/10 648 total posts
Name:
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Re: Having a sad day..
So many hugs to all three of you ladies. I am so sorry. I wish I had words to comfort you, but I don't. You are in my thoughts. I hope that tomorrow will be a better day
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| Posted 6/29/11 4:23 PM |
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Melissa1013
My sweet boy
Member since 1/08 1933 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Having a sad day..
Posted by snowflake09
Posted by Melissa1013
Sending you many .
Tomorrow will be a better day. I know it's hard when we feel like we need to be "the strong ones". If you need to talk or vent or anything I'm here.
Thank you Melissa. And you're right - tomorrow will be better.
I have been trying to write something for the site you shared on here, but for some reason I just haven't been able to do it. In April, I spoke at a remembrance ceremony that Good Sam had, and I just felt like what I wrote wasn't good enough, and I have the same fear with writing for the site. I think I just need to realize that whatever my feelings and words may be, they are true and sincere. Sometimes it really is just so hard to really grasp what we have, and will always, go through...
I wrote what I was feeling at that point. I tried to remember as much as I could. I "let it flow" and hit submit. Honestly I don't remember everything I wrote. I've gone back and read it a couple of times and there are still things I didn't even realize I wrote.
Do it when you're ready and just know that it will be fine. It's your story. No one is looking at grammar or punctuation. No matter what you write I can guarantee you that someone will read it and find some small comfort.
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| Posted 6/29/11 4:48 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name:
sara
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Re: Having a sad day..
I am sorry you are having a sad day I think we expect too much of ourselves sometimes....I had my D&C follow up today and I went in there thinking I was good and there was no way i would break down and the minute the doctor came through the door and asked me how I was feeling I started bawling like a baby...
Lots and lots and lots of hugs going out to you today
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| Posted 6/29/11 4:51 PM |
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kathleeng
Member since 5/05 3775 total posts
Name:
Kathleen
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Re: Having a sad day..
Posted by snowflake09
Posted by kathleeng
So many .
We are here. I completely know what you mean. There are some instances where I think of my son and the sadness is so overwhelming I wonder how I can get through it. Like today I heard a song today at the gym that reminded me of Liam and I was overcome.
Just know you will get through these hard times cause you HAVE. And you WILL. It is ok to have these rough days they are normal. Especially if you are dealing with "trigger days" ie birthdays, anniversaries etc.... Do you belong to a support group that is open on a drop in basis? We had one that we went to monthly in the beginning. We don't really go monthly anymore but we "checked in" a few months ago. It was almost if we were doing ok for awhile but then "fell off the wagon". It was helpful to us and was what we needed. Sometimes you just need the support of those that know exactly what you are going through.
Thank you so much Kathleen. The feelings sometimes are just so overwhelming...
We have gone to a group before - I actually wonder if it's the same one you have gone to. The one we've gone to is in Farmingdale. I haven't gone in a while - partly because I have been taking care of Katelyn, and also, partly because I have been afraid of how other people there will perceive me, now that Katelyn was born. But, I have been thinking that I'll try to go in August when they have the next one. I really feel like I just need to go to be around people who really do understand...
Did u go to GAPS with Martha? We loved it there. I understand what you are saying about perception but you must remember a few of these people have kids already as well, some have also had children after their losses. I remember when we first joined there were a bunch of people with other kids. Honestly, hearing from others who were able to survive and count their other blessings was what helped my husband and I go on. It gave us hope. We may go back as well to the meetings sometime this summer, we need it.
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| Posted 6/29/11 5:31 PM |
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snowflake09
LIF Adult
Member since 4/10 1076 total posts
Name:
Jillian (Bean08)
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Re: Having a sad day..
Posted by kathleeng
Did u go to GAPS with Martha? We loved it there. I understand what you are saying about perception but you must remember a few of these people have kids already as well, some have also had children after their losses. I remember when we first joined there were a bunch of people with other kids. Honestly, hearing from others who were able to survive and count their other blessings was what helped my husband and I go on. It gave us hope. We may go back as well to the meetings sometime this summer, we need it.
Yup, that's the one. Martha is just the sweetest person. They way she gives and helps other people, it's just so amazing to me.
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| Posted 6/29/11 5:33 PM |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: Having a sad day..
I had one of those bad days yesterday. I was driving home from work and thought- wow, I should be like six months pregnant right now and just started crying. It's very tough!
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| Posted 6/29/11 6:37 PM |
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KarenAnthony
Baby Girl Coming in May!!!
Member since 10/07 3031 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Having a sad day..
yes, can TOTALLY relate..sometimes i am overwhelmed with sadness and then other times i'm somewhat "ok". But when i get sad, i get REALLY sad to the point of cyring hysterically, and just feeling so helpless.
But when i hear of tragic stories in the news, it does help me to put thing in perspecticve about my life. Sometimes i think i shouldn't complain or be sad because things could always be so much worse.
Hope u have a better day tomorrow
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| Posted 6/29/11 11:32 PM |
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AngnShaun
Sisters
Member since 1/10 21015 total posts
Name:
Ang
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Re: Having a sad day..
i totally understand the sad days...
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| Posted 6/30/11 9:44 AM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: Having a sad day..
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| Posted 6/30/11 10:33 AM |
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Exarina
My Two Girls
Member since 12/09 1249 total posts
Name:
Lisa Marie
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Re: Having a sad day..
Not that Im glad you are feeling sad but just to see that its normal that feeling sad after having another baby is normal makes me feel better.
I thought that when I had another baby it would make my previous loss at least go away for a bit but I am also feeling sad.
I think its normal- it comes out at times , its going to be a part of you always. hugs
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| Posted 7/4/11 2:30 PM |
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