a poll

so, I have kids but there were times where I wasn't sure if I would have them, for various private reasons. Just wanted to see if anyone had similiar reasons as I did. I also talk to a lot of people who are CF, and I do notice one trend of wanting to remain CF.

I have a poll below, should you care to participate.


no need to comment unless u feel you'd want to share...and this it a total non-judgemental post. I think you girls all rock.

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For DH and I, its a 'kids aren't for us/no maternal-paternal drive', with lifestyle coming in as a smaller, but still important, factor.

I never wanted to be a mom. It's just not for me. And I always knew that I would look for the same in my partner/spouse.

We are excited, though, because in January my sister will be having a baby, making us an aunt and uncle! :)

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Im in the same "kids arent for us" catagory but I have to say I'm a kick a$$ aunt!!



or at least my neice and nephews say that!

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Very similar to pearljamchic...i would add that pregnancy absolutely freaks me out, the birth process freaks me out, i could NEVER imagine putting myself through it.

My mother had 3 kids and became obese. I've never known my mother not obese. That also has been in my head. Not to say all moms get fat, but ive seen plenty that do. They are so busy being devoted to their kids (most anyway) that their own selves can fall by the wayside.

Its a 24/7 job ive never been interested in. Its part of what attracted dh and i to each other as well.

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Love the lifestyle/no maternal feelings - but a little bit of 'I had a rough childhood' mixed in.

I took care of my mom from age 15 on when she was diagnosed with cancer. She died when I was 18. I always wonder if it is part of the reason I want to remain CF - I dont want to put any one else thru what I had to.

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DH and I do not want children. Mostly love our lifestyle no maternal/paternal instincts for DH and I (although everyone says I am great with kids). But also a little bit career oriented too. I spent a lot of time in school and am just now beginning my career and would feel it would set me back to stop and have kids.
Like other mentioned, I love being an Aunt and doing fun things with my niece and nephew and wouldn't give that up for anything. But I love that the kids go home with someone else at the end of the day.

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No maternal feelings for me but I LOVE my niece & nephews & would do anything for them. Well almost anything.

I've never seen myself as a mom. I'm missing that gene.

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DH and I are just waiting a while. We were originally going to wait until we were 29/30, but I think it'll be more like 27/28 now.

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I'm the "I can't have kids and would like them."
It's just not possible and really sux because I always wanted to be a mom.

I'm mom to my furbaby Bella and a kick-azz auntie to my 13yo nephew and 10yo niece.

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All of the above. Seriously. I'm sitting firmly on the fence, I don't know what I want.

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I just always knew I probably shouldn't be a parent. I like kids but I don't want to mess one up! I have seen enough "my mother sucks" posts on here and other MBs to know I don't want to be that person.

I didn't make this decision lightly. I gave it a lot of thought. I have lost relationships over it and have been marginalized by other women for it. In the end it is the absolute right decision for me. I can not live my life by what someone else feels is the correct life plan.

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for me, it's more of a timing thing.

i'm now going through a long, drawn out divorce and i don't see it coming to an end for quite some time. (unfortunately)

that being said, i just don't see myself having children later in life so i guess if miracles upon miracles happen and i wind up completely single, meet the love of my life, marry him, and THEN get PG i just don't see me having kids.

it sucks, i definitely wanted kids but i just don't want to be 60 something and paying college tuition.

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We are enjoying our CF life right now. I never wanted kids. I was totally against kids in my 20s..and I don't mean I didn't want them in my 20s..I knew I never wanted them ever.

Now, I still don't really want them but I'm not as against it. So, we are in the unsure category..If it happens it happens, but unlike those who are trying, I'm on bcp so we are actively trying NOT to make it happen...lol

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I was never a "kid" person but when I was in my early 20's I wanted to get married & have kids...then all my friends got married before me & had kids...and I saw the reality of it all and how you had no time to yourself or freedom...also my goals in life changed...so at 34 I married someone who didn't want kids either...we have a niece & nephews we adore but love coming home to a quiet CF house...we do not want kids...but did say if we ever changed our minds we would adopt a child who was a bit older.

Message edited 12/14/2011 7:11:27 PM.