| Posted By |
Message |
MrsB12614
LIF Adult
Member since 4/14 1986 total posts
Name:
Mrs
|
Just need to let it out
I feel like an awful person. We have been ttc for a while. I have my first RE visit soon and I know this won't be an easy road with my long time pcos diagnosis, today, my husbands brother and his wife had their first child. My first niece. And you know what, I am sad. Very happy to have a niece but I'm not excited and I know it's because of me and my fertility issues. I don't want to feel this way but I just can't help it  and no one understands how I feel. This year alone 14 close friends or coworkers got pregnant or had a baby. Just wearing me so thin
How do you ladies deal
Message edited 10/22/2015 9:38:13 PM.
|
Posted 10/22/15 9:35 PM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
|
|
Re: Just need to let it out
Hi. I felt the same way. I have been TTCing with my husband for over 2 years and no luck. My DH and I have been having fertility issues that we recently found out about. It's been very rough on his both but we are seeing an RE now and have our first IUI next week! My sister had a baby over a year ago and while I was so happy for her, I did feel a little sad. I have walked in your shoes before. Try to stay positive, your time will come to have a baby. Just believe and it will happen. Never lose hope or faith. 
|
| Posted 10/22/15 9:54 PM |
| |
|
IUIGirl
LIF Adolescent
Member since 10/14 852 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Just need to let it out
You're not alone, we understand! I used to be the person that was SO excited when people would announce a pregnancy and now it hurts so much . I try to push past it and keep in mind that when my time comes (and our times WILL come one way or another) I would want everyone to celebrate it. Currently it feels like people are sneezing and getting pregnant around me and it definitely stings. I usually just vent/cry to my best friend or my therapist - therapy has helped a lot!
I am always very happy for others but still very sad for us.
Message edited 10/23/2015 9:40:47 AM.
|
| Posted 10/23/15 9:30 AM |
| |
|
BabyBearA
LIF Adult
Member since 7/11 1254 total posts
Name:
|
Just need to let it out
You are not awful... I know exactly how you feel. This month marks 3 years that we have been trying. I can't even tell you how many cousins and friends have given birth over the years. I cry before every baby shower and christening. I won't go to certain things that are centered around kids and I won't go to a "mommy's night out". But I love them and their kids. I keep praying for our miracle.
|
| Posted 10/23/15 10:04 AM |
| |
|
MrsB12614
LIF Adult
Member since 4/14 1986 total posts
Name:
Mrs
|
Just need to let it out
Ugh thank you ladies for the support I have never felt this way ever. We went to see our niece in the hospital and DH entire extended family was visit too throughout the evening and everyone of those people (I hate DH family for a number of reasons) all they could ask was "so when are you having one?!" I was beside myself last night. I told DH he better say something to his family to not keep asking me because he doesn't want me to say something. I just want to crawl in my bed and cry for days. My heart completely goes to each person struggling and trying for years- truly you are a brave person and I give you all the credit in the world.
Going to treat myself today hopefully I'll feel better
|
| Posted 10/24/15 7:50 AM |
| |
|
babydreams21
LIF Adult
Member since 12/12 3656 total posts
Name:
|
Just need to let it out
This is normal. If you go on the Infertility board almost all of the woman can relate. I was always happy for them but sad for myself. Like why me? What did I do to deserve this? If one more person said they got preg without even trying I felt like I was gonna loose it.
Be your own best advocate. I always tried to tell myself my day will come. It finally did after many procedures. Hang in there.
|
| Posted 10/29/15 9:48 PM |
| |
|
ANewDayHasCome
Love multiplies, not divides
Member since 11/12 14481 total posts
Name:
Me
|
Re: Just need to let it out
Crashing
It's normal and you're not alone in those feelings. It took me a year and a half, 4 IUIs and 2 rounds of ivf to have my first. A year into it my nephew was born. I went to the hospital, held him, fed him...put on a brave face. Then the moment we walked to the car I cried.
Hang in there. Your time will come.
|
| Posted 10/31/15 8:09 AM |
| |
|
IVFmiracle
Complete
Member since 12/12 4088 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Just need to let it out
The good news is that REs have a lot of success helping women with PCOS get pregnant. Your journey might be close to its end. 
How do we deal? We deal only because we have to. What other choice do we have? We put on a a happy face for our friends and family because we want to support them during their happy time. It doesn't mean we have to feel less sorry for our situation.
During our TTC journey I had lots of friends get pregnant and have children. we started TTC a few weeks before one of my friends got married. Well, during our TTC journey, she got married, got pregnant, and had a baby. I was sick over that.
|
| Posted 11/2/15 9:14 PM |
| |
|
MrsB12614
LIF Adult
Member since 4/14 1986 total posts
Name:
Mrs
|
Just need to let it out
Thank you for your support ladies. I feel for each person going through what we are. However I am happy for my family and couldn't love my niece more. I know in my heart that one day we will have our bundle of joy but for now I had to take a good look in the mirror and not allow my self to be the person that just can't be happy for others. That never has been me and I won't allow it to be me. As hard as this road is- what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and I truly believe that !
|
| Posted 11/3/15 2:50 PM |
| |
|
IUIGirl
LIF Adolescent
Member since 10/14 852 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Just need to let it out
Posted by MrsB12614
Thank you for your support ladies. I feel for each person going through what we are. However I am happy for my family and couldn't love my niece more. I know in my heart that one day we will have our bundle of joy but for now I had to take a good look in the mirror and not allow my self to be the person that just can't be happy for others. That never has been me and I won't allow it to be me. As hard as this road is- what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and I truly believe that !
|
| Posted 11/3/15 2:51 PM |
| |
|
IVFmiracle
Complete
Member since 12/12 4088 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Just need to let it out
Posted by MrsB12614
Thank you for your support ladies. I feel for each person going through what we are. However I am happy for my family and couldn't love my niece more. I know in my heart that one day we will have our bundle of joy but for now I had to take a good look in the mirror and not allow my self to be the person that just can't be happy for others. That never has been me and I won't allow it to be me. As hard as this road is- what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and I truly believe that !
It's so true. And to add, once you have that bundle of joy, you won't ever think back to all of those moments you were sad for yourself. Simply because you won't be able to imagine having any child other than the one you have!
|
| Posted 11/3/15 3:42 PM |
| |
|
JJ2014
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/14 686 total posts
Name:
|
Just need to let it out
You are not alone!!! We are all here for you and we are all in the same boat. But I will tell you there is hope and light at the end of this tunnel. I'm currently 19weeks along after 1.5 years of TTC and then a successful IUI in January which I miscarried at 8weeks in March. I am happy to hear you'll be seeing an RE soon, because that's what I would be telling you to do if you weren't already. It's VERY hard but you need to try and stay positive, and trust me it is not easy after such a long time of trying and then a loss! But you have to because your time will come!!! And I'll share this with you, even though I know I got lucky with 2 successful IUI's I still cringe with a little hate every time I hear someone is pregnant... especially when I know they weren't even trying. That for me has not gone away and I don't know if it will. I am able to be happy for others, for a long time I hid it too, but now I can be excited again and mean it. I wish you the best of luck and please PM me if you have any Infertility questions or just need support!!!
|
| Posted 11/4/15 8:30 AM |
| |
|
MrsB12614
LIF Adult
Member since 4/14 1986 total posts
Name:
Mrs
|
Just need to let it out
Thank you all so much for sharing your stories and support- it is truly heartwarming to know people I have never met are willing to share their feelings and what has helped them through their tough times!! So grateful!
|
| Posted 11/5/15 5:43 AM |
| |
|
|
|
Re: Just need to let it out
Posted by MrsB12614
Thank you all so much for sharing your stories and support- it is truly heartwarming to know people I have never met are willing to share their feelings and what has helped them through their tough times!! So grateful!
|
| Posted 11/5/15 1:09 PM |
| |
|
Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
|
Re: Just need to let it out
my sister in law knew what i was going through with failed IUI's and starting IVF. She asked if it hurt me when other people got pregnant. I said, Im not gonna lie, it does sting a little. but ultimately I usually dont know their journey or the road they took to get there.
I think it was 2 mo later that her and BIL called saying they were having a baby. which shocked the hell out of us b/c NO ONE thought they would ever have kids just b/c of the carefree lives they live.
I was happy for her really. But i cried after we got off the phone. and DH was like "well you already have a kid, dont feel so bad." I was more mad at that comment b/c YES I do have a DS already. that doesnt mean I cant feel frustrated or upset over my current situation, failures, etc.
You will get there. and its totally OK to feel jealous, sad, disappointed, whatever when someone else has a baby.
|
| Posted 11/5/15 7:54 PM |
| |
|
