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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
we've been avoiding a friend for so long and i feel guilty just flat-out ignoring texts all the time.
What are you go-to excuses for not hanging out with someone?? I can only use the "im sick" excuse for so long!
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Posted 12/24/16 9:32 AM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
Name: L
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Can you just not respond?
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Posted 12/24/16 10:46 AM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
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Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name: Phyllis
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
You can use a work or family obligation
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Posted 12/24/16 10:56 AM |
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WannaBeAMom11
LIF Adult
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Member since 1/11 7391 total posts
Name: Name
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Why don't you talk to them and hash out the issue?
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Posted 12/24/16 11:29 AM |
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PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!
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Member since 5/11 7621 total posts
Name: Momma <3
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
If you plan on never getting together with them again, I'd ignore them or tell them you're not interested in hanging out.
Message edited 12/24/2016 11:33:05 AM.
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Posted 12/24/16 11:32 AM |
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hmm
Sweet
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Member since 1/14 7997 total posts
Name:
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
I would hate not having my calls, text etc answered. The other person might not realize you don't want to be friends etc, they might not know their is an issues. OR they notice you have not answered but all it does is leave the other person wondering what happened. It can cause anger and resentment. If you don't want to hang out anymore just tell them, hard to do I know.
Message edited 12/24/2016 11:55:30 AM.
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Posted 12/24/16 11:54 AM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by hmm
I would hate not having my calls, text etc answered. The other person might not realize you don't want to be friends etc, they might not know their is an issues. OR they notice you have not answered but all it does is leave the other person wondering what happened. It can cause anger and resentment. If you don't want to hang out anymore just tell them, hard to do I know.
I agree, I think making excuses or ignoring is kind of childish.
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Posted 12/24/16 12:56 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by hmm
I would hate not having my calls, text etc answered. The other person might not realize you don't want to be friends etc, they might not know their is an issues. OR they notice you have not answered but all it does is leave the other person wondering what happened. It can cause anger and resentment. If you don't want to hang out anymore just tell them, hard to do I know.
I agree, I think making excuses or ignoring is kind of childish.
Yeah i know it is childish, but I don't really know how to say "I'm not really interested in having a relationship with you anymore" in a nice way lol. In my mind, if I avoided for long enough maybe she'd just get the hint and back off, but it's only made her reach out more! I've never really had to do this before & it's kind of awkward =/
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Posted 12/24/16 1:21 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Why don't you talk to them and hash out the issue?
there really isn't an issue. the person just has some immature habits and behaviors that i don't care to bring my child around. I don't want to address these things because it's her life and she can do what she wants.
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Posted 12/24/16 1:23 PM |
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MrsG823
Just call me Mommy.
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Member since 1/11 5570 total posts
Name: S
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by mommy2be716
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Why don't you talk to them and hash out the issue?
there really isn't an issue. the person just has some immature habits and behaviors that i don't care to bring my child around. I don't want to address these things because it's her life and she can do what she wants.
I would just be direct and tell the person you are not interested in spending time with them--avoiding someone is pretty immature behavior too- don't you think?
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Posted 12/24/16 1:33 PM |
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Chai77
Brighter days ahead
Member since 4/07 7364 total posts
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by MrsG823
Posted by mommy2be716
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Why don't you talk to them and hash out the issue?
there really isn't an issue. the person just has some immature habits and behaviors that i don't care to bring my child around. I don't want to address these things because it's her life and she can do what she wants.
I would just be direct and tell the person you are not interested in spending time with them--avoiding someone is pretty immature behavior too- don't you think?
Agreed. What if you said something like- We are just in two different places in life right now, and I am very busy with my child, I'll contact you if that changes? I think it's better to say something so she gets the message.
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Posted 12/24/16 2:39 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by Chai77
Posted by MrsG823
Posted by mommy2be716
Posted by WannaBeAMom11
Why don't you talk to them and hash out the issue?
there really isn't an issue. the person just has some immature habits and behaviors that i don't care to bring my child around. I don't want to address these things because it's her life and she can do what she wants.
I would just be direct and tell the person you are not interested in spending time with them--avoiding someone is pretty immature behavior too- don't you think?
Agreed. What if you said something like- We are just in two different places in life right now, and I am very busy with my child, I'll contact you if that changes? I think it's better to say something so she gets the message.
yeah, you're right. I'll wait for her to reach out again and will handle it next time.. It's easier said than done, but i know I've gotta be up front at some point
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Posted 12/24/16 3:34 PM |
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Funkybutt
LIF Adult
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Member since 4/15 3049 total posts
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
I was on the receiving end of something similar and I had NO idea that she didn't want to hang out anymore until I saw her family and 2 other families together (I also used to hang out with those families) at a park. I thought back to how she slowly stopped responding and it finally sunk in, but it made me feel horrible.
I know it's difficult to tell someone you don't want to hang out anymore bc I would have a lot of trouble with it, too, but I wish my old friend had let me know instead of me going along clueless and thinking it was just that she was too busy.
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Posted 12/24/16 4:21 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
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Member since 1/14 7997 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by mommy2be716
Posted by LuckyStar
Posted by hmm
I would hate not having my calls, text etc answered. The other person might not realize you don't want to be friends etc, they might not know their is an issues. OR they notice you have not answered but all it does is leave the other person wondering what happened. It can cause anger and resentment. If you don't want to hang out anymore just tell them, hard to do I know.
I agree, I think making excuses or ignoring is kind of childish.
Yeah i know it is childish, but I don't really know how to say "I'm not really interested in having a relationship with you anymore" in a nice way lol. In my mind, if I avoided for long enough maybe she'd just get the hint and back off, but it's only made her reach out more! I've never really had to do this before & it's kind of awkward =/
childish?? so many people use this type of behavior bc they want to avoid. She keep s reaching out, imo bc she senses something is off but is not 100% sure. What is it about her that is causing you to not remain friends? not nice, nothing in common etc?
Message edited 12/24/2016 4:47:04 PM.
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Posted 12/24/16 4:45 PM |
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queensgal
Smile
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Member since 4/09 3287 total posts
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
We were told a family member didn't attend Xmas eve due to pms.....so I guess that's an option
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Posted 12/24/16 10:22 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
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Member since 1/14 7997 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by queensgal
We were told a family member didn't attend Xmas eve due to pms.....so I guess that's an option
good one
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Posted 12/25/16 8:19 AM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
I'd leave it alone. It's far from immature to spare someone's feelings. If you don't want to answer, don't answer. But don't hurt the person.
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Posted 12/25/16 8:20 AM |
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hmm
Sweet
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Member since 1/14 7997 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by PrincessP
I'd leave it alone. It's far from immature to spare someone's feelings. If you don't want to answer, don't answer. But don't hurt the person.
just wondering, how is ignoring someone not hurting their feelings?
Telling someone why might hurt or it might not but ignoring can be hurtful and conufusing
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Posted 12/25/16 2:03 PM |
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drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!
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Member since 6/07 8274 total posts
Name: me
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by hmm
Posted by PrincessP
I'd leave it alone. It's far from immature to spare someone's feelings. If you don't want to answer, don't answer. But don't hurt the person.
just wondering, how is ignoring someone not hurting their feelings?
Telling someone why might hurt or it might not but ignoring can be hurtful and conufusing
I agree. Ignoring the person is worse.
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Posted 12/25/16 2:28 PM |
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WonderLady
LIF Infant
Member since 1/15 355 total posts
Name:
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
I think ignoring is better than telling someone you don't like them. Jmo.
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Posted 12/25/16 10:08 PM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by WonderLady
I think ignoring is better than telling someone you don't like them. Jmo.
Exactly !
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Posted 12/26/16 5:53 AM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by hmm
Posted by PrincessP
I'd leave it alone. It's far from immature to spare someone's feelings. If you don't want to answer, don't answer. But don't hurt the person.
just wondering, how is ignoring someone not hurting their feelings?
Telling someone why might hurt or it might not but ignoring can be hurtful and conufusing
And why would you think your opinion of someone matters? I'm curious? It's ok to move on without hurting someone's feelings.
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Posted 12/26/16 5:54 AM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by PrincessP
Posted by hmm
Posted by PrincessP
I'd leave it alone. It's far from immature to spare someone's feelings. If you don't want to answer, don't answer. But don't hurt the person.
just wondering, how is ignoring someone not hurting their feelings?
Telling someone why might hurt or it might not but ignoring can be hurtful and conufusing
And why would you think your opinion of someone matters? I'm curious? It's ok to move on without hurting someone's feelings.
this is kind of what I am struggling with. I know it's the more mature thing to have a convo and tell her the reasons why we don't really want to have a relationship with her (drinking habits, drugs, telling other friends and family my personal business because she feels it is her place, and we are just simply at two different places in our lives and don't have anything in common anymore), but I also don't want to hurt her more by addressing habits that she doesn't seem concerned about on her end. I feel like it is not my place to tell her that her behavior is inappropriate and whatever, because she has the right to do whatever she wants with her life. I just no longer want to be around that.
That is why I was just ignoring and then saying I didn't see the text, using the baby as my excuse for alot of reasons why i couldn't hang out, saying I was busy with work, etc. But she continues to berate me and not leave me alone. Unfortunately, I have felt this way for over 5 years and never said anything because she gave me my space and we saw each other a couple of times a year so it was tolerable. Now that I have dd, she has been trying to reconnect more than ever and won't back down.
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Posted 12/26/16 7:43 AM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
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Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name: Karen
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best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Just tell her you're very busy now with family obligations and do not think there will be any time to hang out in the foreseeable future. If anything changes you will contact her. Just making excuses is leading the person on.
Message edited 12/26/2016 11:43:34 AM.
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Posted 12/26/16 11:43 AM |
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hmm
Sweet
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Member since 1/14 7997 total posts
Name:
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Re: best excuses to avoid hanging out wih someone??
Posted by PrincessP
Posted by WonderLady
I think ignoring is better than telling someone you don't like them. Jmo.
Exactly !
you dont have to say "I dont like you" Its ok not to connect with someone but say something like you feel as if you lives are going in a different direction.
Because leaving it alone can be just as hurtful then just saying something. JMO
Message edited 12/26/2016 1:35:23 PM.
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Posted 12/26/16 1:10 PM |
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