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Spinoff: Baptism Question

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bookworm
Two Little Rosebuds

Member since 8/09

2106 total posts

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Spinoff: Baptism Question

I am really not religious at all but my MIL is a super-Catholic. My husband is a disillusioned Catholic who went through all the religious education including confirmation and now exists somewhere between agnostic and atheist. I have considered having our girls baptized/christened (I honestly do not know the difference between these two things) because I know it is important to her.

Has anyone found themselves in this situation?

Posted 12/29/16 6:30 AM
 
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PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!

Member since 5/11

7619 total posts

Name:
Momma <3

Spinoff: Baptism Question

My DH and I are not very religious; my DH is less religious than me. My parents are also not very religious. My ILs are very religious. We choose to baptize our DS. It was definitely something both sides expected to be done.

Message edited 12/29/2016 7:08:42 AM.

Posted 12/29/16 7:07 AM
 

starbrightgirl8
LIF Adolescent

Member since 1/16

537 total posts

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Spinoff: Baptism Question

My DS was not baptized, and it drives my MIL nuts. She's not even super-Catholic. I don't think she's ever gone to church in the 8+ years I've known her other than for events like weddings, baptisms, funerals, etc. She just thinks it would be "nice" for him to be baptized, and she has a friend who wasn't baptized and wished her parents had done it. Neither of which are compelling reasons. I'm pretty sure she just wants it done because everyone else does it.

I was raised Catholic, but never confirmed. My husband was confirmed, but hasn't been to church since. I'm not going to stand in front of the church and say that I will raise my son Catholic, when I know neither my husband nor I actually intend to raise him Catholic. If he has an interest in religion when he's older, then I will fully support him exploring that, but I'm not choosing it for him when I rejected it myself.

Also, when we considered doing it for a second, it quickly became clear there was going to be drama about who we wanted as Godparents, so that was an extra reason to just avoid it.

Posted 12/29/16 9:28 AM
 

RainyDay
LIF Adult

Member since 6/15

3990 total posts

Name:

Spinoff: Baptism Question

DH and I do not attend church and have no desire to raise our child with a religion The rest of my family is very religious and I do not plan to baptize my child just because the rest of my family is religious.

I don't really get the point of baptism if you don't plan oN attending church on a regular basis with your child.

Posted 12/29/16 2:18 PM
 

jamnmore
LIF Adult

Member since 6/16

989 total posts

Name:

Spinoff: Baptism Question

If I remember correctly, baptism is to absolve the child of original sin. That is typically why it is done so early. It is so if something were to happen to the child it would be forgiven. It has nothing to do with future religious education.

Posted 12/29/16 2:53 PM
 

Chai77
Brighter days ahead

Member since 4/07

7364 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff: Baptism Question

Posted by RainyDay

DH and I do not attend church and have no desire to raise our child with a religion The rest of my family is very religious and I do not plan to baptize my child just because the rest of my family is religious.

I don't really get the point of baptism if you don't plan oN attending church on a regular basis with your child.



Us too. We are agnostic/atheist. My in laws are incredibly religious. We refuse to involve our children in religion for our in laws, though they would love it.

Posted 12/29/16 4:01 PM
 

starbrightgirl8
LIF Adolescent

Member since 1/16

537 total posts

Name:

Spinoff: Baptism Question

It's not just absolving them of original sin, but also committing them to the religion. Cannon law regarding baptism states:
Can. 868 §1 For an infant to be baptised lawfully it is required:
(1) that the parents, or at least one of them, or the person who lawfully holds their place, give their consent;
(2) that there be a well-founded hope that the child will be brought up in the catholic religion. If such hope is truly lacking, the baptism is, in accordance with the provisions of particular law, to be deferred and the parents advised of the reason for this.

Posted 12/29/16 4:02 PM
 

RainyDay
LIF Adult

Member since 6/15

3990 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff: Baptism Question

Posted by jamnmore

If I remember correctly, baptism is to absolve the child of original sin. That is typically why it is done so early. It is so if something were to happen to the child it would be forgiven. It has nothing to do with future religious education.



My point is if the parents of the child don't follow the religion or plan on raising the child to follow the religion then what is the point of having the child baptized.

Posted 12/29/16 6:25 PM
 

LuckyStar
LIF Adult

Member since 7/14

7274 total posts

Name:

Spinoff: Baptism Question

I'm a lapsed Catholic and DH is agnostic but was raised Jewish (pork eating, Christmas celebrating, kicked out of Hebrew school Jewish). My family and I do not go to church.

DD is baptized. I plan to have her make her communion as well.

Posted 12/29/16 7:31 PM
 

gina409
TWINS!

Member since 12/09

27635 total posts

Name:
g

Re: Spinoff: Baptism Question

For us it was very important

But if I was you I would look at it like this,if it's not in your beliefs then it's just water

Obviously it's your decision and whatever you decide is the right thing


If it's super import to her and if you don't mind then I would.
If you do then don't,Kwim

Hope I am making sense lol

Posted 12/30/16 2:23 PM
 

bookworm
Two Little Rosebuds

Member since 8/09

2106 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff: Baptism Question

Posted by gina409

For us it was very important

But if I was you I would look at it like this,if it's not in your beliefs then it's just water

Obviously it's your decision and whatever you decide is the right thing


If it's super import to her and if you don't mind then I would.
If you do then don't,Kwim

Hope I am making sense lol



Yeah, this is where I stand: to me, it's just a bath, and my MIL is so Catholic she's actually allowed to be the one who gives you the communion wafer at mass. I'm willing to bend on this to make her happy.

My concern with the Catholic church is the way they tend to want to bind you into this contract about what you'll do as far as religious education and practice down the road. I haven't made those kinds of decisions, and I'm not sure how they'll treat me as the non-practicing Protestant-heathen mom...

Posted 12/30/16 3:03 PM
 

WannaBeAMom11
LIF Adult

Member since 1/11

7391 total posts

Name:
Name

Spinoff: Baptism Question

Dh nor I are religious at all. However, I was raised in the Catholic Church so we had dd baptized and will do it for this one too. They will both be communed and confirmed and they can choose what they want to do in the future. I just want them to have some foundation.

Posted 12/30/16 5:02 PM
 

LuckyStar
LIF Adult

Member since 7/14

7274 total posts

Name:

Re: Spinoff: Baptism Question

Posted by bookworm

Posted by gina409

For us it was very important

But if I was you I would look at it like this,if it's not in your beliefs then it's just water

Obviously it's your decision and whatever you decide is the right thing


If it's super import to her and if you don't mind then I would.
If you do then don't,Kwim

Hope I am making sense lol



Yeah, this is where I stand: to me, it's just a bath, and my MIL is so Catholic she's actually allowed to be the one who gives you the communion wafer at mass. I'm willing to bend on this to make her happy.

My concern with the Catholic church is the way they tend to want to bind you into this contract about what you'll do as far as religious education and practice down the road. I haven't made those kinds of decisions, and I'm not sure how they'll treat me as the non-practicing Protestant-heathen mom...



You're not bound to anything and unless you start going to weekly mass the priest likely won't remember you a few weeks later.

FWIW, the people who ran our baptism "class" (we were the only ones in it) were extremely supportive of DH's Jewish upbringing and made ME promise to include DD in Jewish traditions and went on and on about how important it is that she celebrate her Jewish heritage.

Posted 12/30/16 7:55 PM
 
 

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