Potty training with severe physical delays

My pediatrician and i disagree on this topic. My daughter will be 3 in early May, was born with bilateral congenital foot deformity, she had treatment and surgery in St. Louis, MO. Doctors in NY have been useless from day 1. I have 2 older kids and my pediatrician told me to potty train my third like I potty trained my older 2. This child takes about 35 unassisted steps, cannot lower herself from her knees. She throws herself down from her hips. She can't get on a potty or a toilet independently. She is removing her clothes, but not like normal kids do. She has had potty successes, more with poop then pee because we know when she needs to poop she cries and tries to withhold. The last 3 days I've been in over my head as my older child has a fever and ear infection so the toddler has had zero pee successes. She cannot stand still unassisted at all. Should I even bother potty training? She goes to a developmental preschool so my guess is there is no time constraint to get her going. Her therapists just don't know how to handle this. My guess is no one would know unless they have a child with it. She is not cognitively delayed. Just physically. She gets speech,ot and pt... though when it comes to real life stuff like potty training, my cat gives me more valuable advice then the new york doctors and therapists. Anyone elsr out there with a kid who is cognitively okay but physically awful. Her IQ is average and she is very social.

Message edited 4/12/2017 11:59:25 AM.

Re: Potty training with severe physical delays

Have a meeting with the OT/PT to figure out a plan for potty training. If she is cognativly intact, and has no difficulties with her digestive system or urinary tract system, there is absolutely no reason NOT to potty train her. They need to modify the toilet so she can learn to transfer on and off of it. They also need to practice dressing/undressing, hand washing etc... How old is she? She has to work towards independence and she will need a plan for when she enters the school district as a school aged child.

Message edited 4/12/2017 6:17:22 AM.

Potty training with severe physical delays

How old is she?

She needs to be potty trained. It is so important for her in the future but depending on her age, you may need to wait a little bit. Is your bathroom handicap accessible? You may need equipment in the bathroom to help her. Talk to her PT and OT and come up with a plan. If they have no clue, find other therapists.

Potty training with severe physical delays

Dd has low tone but she was not in physical therapy when she trained. She wouldn't potty train until she turned 3 and I do think her physical instability was part off what scared her so much. We tried a variety of seats, steps, etc and she eventually took to a seat/step combo I got on amazon but she still wanted help getting on and off. Eventually she got scared of that and we switched to a step stool with the toilet seat with a built in kids seat but again she needed help getting up and down for a while. When she started prek at 4 and I saw the bathroom I realized there's no way she'd be comfortable in there. She was starting physical therapy again so the therapist worked with her with clothes in just getting on and off. I also asked to go in the bathroom with her a few times when I dropped her off to help her get comfortable in there but I also knew she'd rarely go during school bc it's only 2.5 hours. I am stressing about how she'll deal in full day kindergarten though. I am still on the fence about whether I want to pursue having her classified but if I do that may be something I address to see what they can do for her.

I don't know that there's much different you need to do in terms of training but her physical therapist should definitely be helping her learn to get on and off and help you figure out how to make the bathroom accessible for her.

Re: Potty training with severe physical delays

Sorry, she will be 3 in early May.

Re: Potty training with severe physical delays

My bathrooms are typical bathrooms. I can't change that nor do I want to. Eventually she is expected to be okay so I can't see investing in bathroom modifications for a 3 year old, by the time she is 10 she may (or may not) have no issues.

Re: Potty training with severe physical delays

Her recent evaluations for transitioning from EI to district the psychologist said she should be fine in an integrated kindergarten class which my school building offers. They also have one on one side, maybe she will need that, it's still very uncertain what she might need or not. I stripped her if all clothing from the waist down which was very effective with my 7 year old back when she was this age. My 7 year old has low tone, adhd, spd... She was trained in 3 days this way, however, I'm finding this daughter is peeing less than every 6 or 7 minutes. She pees on the towel on the floor, I have hard wood floors so I don't want her peeing on that as much as possible, then she goes and pees in the toilet right after. Not sure if I should reward her or not. Not sure if she isn't feeling the sensation?

Re: Potty training with severe physical delays

Okay, throwing the towel, literally... lol. She just peed off the towel. Done potty training for now. Will have to speak with pt and ot, which I'm sure won't be very useful. Also might be changing pediatricians. Just ny doctors are so awful I feel like we could bounce around forever never getting the help she needs.

Potty training with severe physical delays

I never had success with the 3 day method with either of my kids. I do hear a lot about the oh crap potty training book lately. Maybe take a break to regroup and check that out to have a new method to try. In the meantime I would get on her pt to work with her on getting up and down and strengthening whatever muscles may be holding her back from that.

Sounds like she's not fully emptying her bladder if she's peeing so often. In the beginning my youngest would pee a little and stop but if I told her to go more she often would. She had to learn to really release.