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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9534 total posts
Name:
The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Small Vent
I know we all say you do you, and I'll do me, but sometimes it's just hard.
DH is a cancer survivor. He also has high blood pressure. Two big co-morbid conditions that mean poorer outcomes if you contract Covid-19.
I have a "friend" (and I'm using quotes because I'm starting to question the friendship) who continues to invite me to do things during the current crisis. She knows DH's situation, and she knows that while I may want to follow phase two guidelines, it's just not worth DH's life. Every time we talk (and I mean talk, not text) she goes on and on about how this is just like the flu, how none of the area hospitals have had any Covid patients for weeks (NOT true), how sooner or later I have to just break through that bubble etc etc etc.
I have repeatedly told her I don't make decisions in a vacuum, and I have to take DH's health into consideration (not to mention DD), and that I don't have the luxury she does of having a totally healthy DH and no kids.
It's starting to get to me. I want to scream at her for being insensitive. Mind you she has lost two relatives to Covid, but still thinks this is all hype/nonsense etc. 
I know there is no way to change her mind and get her to see that I have to do what is best for me and my family given our circumstances, but I needed to vent.
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Posted 6/12/20 9:24 PM  |
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MichLiz213
Life is Good!
Member since 7/07 7979 total posts
Name:
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Small Vent
That’s incredibly frustrating. I’m sorry she is not hearing you and doesn’t understand.
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| Posted 6/12/20 9:35 PM |
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Funkybutt
LIF Adult
Member since 4/15 3049 total posts
Name:
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Small Vent
That’s really insensitive. If it were me, I’d severely limit my phone calls with her. Not cut ties, but certainly not place myself in the situation to listen to her all the time.
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| Posted 6/13/20 8:55 AM |
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RainyDay
LIF Adult
Member since 6/15 3990 total posts
Name:
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Small Vent
Why have friends like that? Honestly I would just start distancing myself.
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| Posted 6/13/20 10:06 AM |
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Hopefulmama
LIF Adult
Member since 4/14 1014 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
That is very insensitive. I’d lessen my contact. You don’t need the added stress.
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| Posted 6/13/20 11:05 AM |
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seaside
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 3101 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
Beyond aggressive of her to recklessly nd constantly lie to you in a way that could hurt your family so much. You deserve better in your life.
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| Posted 6/13/20 11:42 AM |
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Re: Small Vent
I would drop her. She is delusional and probably watches Fox (faux) news.
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| Posted 6/13/20 12:37 PM |
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Small Vent
I’m so sorry that’s incredibly frustrating and I wouldn’t risk your husbands life and if she really wants we made a small covid video with patients permission of coarse to show them what covid is like on the inside. It’s not the flu and if she wants a tube jammed down her throat so be it. And my hospital still has about 60 covid patients including 3 covid ICU units and we are roughly 10 PUIs a day (some days more some less) thankfully our death rate is down but we had about 110 deaths related to covid just in our ICU population at my hospital. Again a small % but it can be anyone.... hang in there and you are doing the right thing
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| Posted 6/13/20 1:01 PM |
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Adri
Joy!
Member since 5/05 3116 total posts
Name:
A
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Re: Small Vent
It's very insensitive and frustrating. I'd distance myself. No need for insensitive "friends" around me.
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| Posted 6/13/20 2:54 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Small Vent
Posted by seaside
Beyond aggressive of her to recklessly nd constantly lie to you in a way that could hurt your family so much. You deserve better in your life.
this
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| Posted 6/13/20 2:56 PM |
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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9534 total posts
Name:
The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Small Vent
Thanks everyone. I have been distancing myself - but the invites, together with the snark when I decline the invite keep coming.
I would love to go hang out in her backyard with the fire pit etc - but I know she hasn't been social distancing because she's said her mother (who works at a supermarket) and her sister have been by her house to have lunch, not to mention her hubby works for an essential business.
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| Posted 6/13/20 5:18 PM |
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jlm2008
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 5092 total posts
Name:
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Small Vent
She is certainly no friend. Like they say, with a friend like that, who needs enemies. From what you described, I wouldn't even be speaking to her anymore. Do what is best for your husband.
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| Posted 6/14/20 10:39 AM |
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jlm2008
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 5092 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
Posted by TwinMommyToBoys
I’m so sorry that’s incredibly frustrating and I wouldn’t risk your husbands life and if she really wants we made a small covid video with patients permission of coarse to show them what covid is like on the inside. It’s not the flu and if she wants a tube jammed down her throat so be it. And my hospital still has about 60 covid patients including 3 covid ICU units and we are roughly 10 PUIs a day (some days more some less) thankfully our death rate is down but we had about 110 deaths related to covid just in our ICU population at my hospital. Again a small % but it can be anyone.... hang in there and you are doing the right thing
Maybe you should post that video here.
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| Posted 6/14/20 10:40 AM |
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Christine2
LIF Adult
Member since 2/09 1217 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
Is she usually a good friend? Not everyone is taking social isolation well. I think the depression rate is soaring. If she is usually a confidante and someone whose interaction you enjoy, then continue to politely decline and give her the benefit of the doubt. If she really isn't a great friend then just distance yourself and move on. No need to be snarky back. Just continue to consistently decline until you feel comfortable.
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| Posted 6/14/20 5:50 PM |
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lmcmcl
LIF Toddler
Member since 2/15 484 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
Posted by jlm2008
Posted by TwinMommyToBoys
I’m so sorry that’s incredibly frustrating and I wouldn’t risk your husbands life and if she really wants we made a small covid video with patients permission of coarse to show them what covid is like on the inside. It’s not the flu and if she wants a tube jammed down her throat so be it. And my hospital still has about 60 covid patients including 3 covid ICU units and we are roughly 10 PUIs a day (some days more some less) thankfully our death rate is down but we had about 110 deaths related to covid just in our ICU population at my hospital. Again a small % but it can be anyone.... hang in there and you are doing the right thing
Maybe you should post that video here.
I would appreciate that as well. TIA
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| Posted 6/14/20 8:20 PM |
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seaside
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 3101 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
That video sounds really helpful. People do not get it.
As for your friend, can you ask her, point blank, why she continues to press this point when she full well knows what you are going to say?
Sometimes, an honest question asked in a friendly manner can create some self refelction.
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| Posted 6/14/20 9:04 PM |
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Chai77
Brighter days ahead
Member since 4/07 7364 total posts
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Re: Small Vent
Or, as I say, with friends like that who needs friends?
I'm sorry. That is extremely disrespectful. I wouldn't waste my time with someone treating me like that.
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| Posted 6/15/20 12:18 PM |
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pjt212301
LIF Adult
Member since 7/12 1214 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small Vent
Posted by seaside
That video sounds really helpful. People do not get it.
As for your friend, can you ask her, point blank, why she continues to press this point when she full well knows what you are going to say?
Sometimes, an honest question asked in a friendly manner can create some self refelction.
This!!!
If she a good friend and someone you enjoy spending time with SAY SOMETHING.
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| Posted 6/15/20 8:58 AM |
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