The birth of Benjamin Joseph

I have to start off by saying that this has been one amazing journey. I can’t believe how fast it all went. I remember the frustration of trying to conceive & the joy of that positive pregnancy test like it was yesterday, and now I am sitting here holding my baby son. It’s amazing to me. It’s a true testament to how fast time flies. With that said, this is the story of the VBAC birth of Benjamin Joseph.

Benjamin was due on March 31, 2009. I was really hoping, and kind of expecting to go into labor by 41 weeks. So, on April 7th as I drove to my 41 week visit with my midwife, I was starting to get nervous. I knew at 42 weeks I would be scheduled for induction and I know that inductions have a high rate of leading to c-sections which I was trying so hard to avoid. When I arrived at the appointment I was checked for any progress. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that I was 2cm dilated with a slightly long cervix and the baby’s head was low enough that Heather could feel it in my cervix. At that point, we discussed induction. I was told to be at Stony Brook Hospital at 7am on April 14th to be induced. The whole way home, I silently begged Ben to come out within the week, but all the while I was resigning myself to being pregnant for another week and having my pregnancy end with an induction. I started to really believe that this was how it was going to happen. I started getting some cramping on the way home and I also had some bloody show in the office from the exam. I realliy figured all the cramping and bleeding was solely a result of the exam. As the day went on, the cramping continued, but I thought nothing of it.

That night, I tried to convince my husband to help me get labor started. My midwives had all been telling me to do it as much as possible. Adam, however, groaned at the idea and pretty much refused. I was so angry because I thought it was my one shot at avoiding an induction. I stormed out of the bedroom screaming something about him being selfish. When I finally went back into our room and got into bed it was just after midnight on April 8th. That was when I felt my first contraction.

I laid in bed for a little while feeling the contractions. I finally decided to get up and time them to see if anything was really going on. It seems they were about 5 minutes apart and lasting 30-45 seconds. I stayed on the computer for a while timing them with Contraction Master, which proved that they were coming regularly every 4-6 minutes. Every once in a while they would space out slightly and I would feel convinced that it was just false labor. Around 1:30 am I decided to just go to bed, but It was too uncomfortable to lay down and the contractions were making it impossible to get any sleep. I got up again and walked around the house for a while. I decided to call my mom around 2am to tell her what was going on. I kept insisting that I didn’t want to bother my mom and Adam because they both had to work and I was not convinced this was going anywhere. Every time I would begin to get excited because the contractions were indeed regular and getting longer, one would space out and I would feel disappointed because I just knew my labor was stopping. I was on and off the phone with my mother for the next few hours timing the contractions and walking around the house while breathing through them. While they were painful enough that I couldn’t talk through them, they weren’t all that bad so I figured it wasn’t possibly time to get to the hospital yet. Everyone was nervous with the hospital being nearly an hour away without traffic, but I kept refusing to call my midwives or believe that this was definitely labor. Around 5am Kayleigh woke up to me working through the contractions. She told me that I was being too loud and I needed to be quieter. I explained that Benny may be coming so I was having pains. That was pretty much it for her sleeping and she decided to watch The Little Mermaid. I tried to get some sleep, but it wasn’t possible. I ended up hanging on to Adam during a few contractions in bed. I started debating calling the midwives, but I just wanted to stay out of the hospital for as long as possible. At 6:30am I decided it was finally time to take the leap and I put in the call to my midwives. When they called back they told me to head to the hospital to see what was going on
We began to rush around to get Kayleigh dressed and I packed a few last minute items in my hospital bag. It was a little after 7am when we headed out to drop Kayleigh off with my mother-in-law and pick up my mother. I quickly realized that sitting strapped into the car wasn’t going to happen. When we got to my in-laws, I told Adam to take Kayleigh’s carseat out of the back so I could stretch out across the whole back seat for the drive. Then we picked up my mother and we were off to the hospital. I spent a lot of time on all fours leaning over my hospital bag. I tried to lie down, but that brought on the worst contraction yet. I started crying, but I think it was more anxiety and pain combined than just the pain. I was aware of my mom and Adam talking in the front, but I really couldn’t respond to them. I remember them saying “So Benny’s birthdate will be April 8th.” I just kept saying “MAYBE!” because I was so worried we’d just be sent home. Apparently, Adam was doing about 80mph the whole way down the LIE because the trip barely took 40 minutes.

We got to L&D and I was hooked up to a monitor and it was confirmed that I was contracting about every 3-5 minutes. Susan came in and checked me and said that I was 3-4cm dilated and 100% effaced and based on the contractions and the change from my appointment the previous morning, she was sure that this was it. I felt so relieved that we weren’t going to be sent home and that this was really it, plus, I had already at the very least reached the point I was at when I had failed with Kayleigh (3cm) and I had just begun. We were moved into room in the back of the L&D floor. As it turns out, the rumor about the full moon is true. L&D was so packed that they didn’t have enough room. There were about 3 women ahead of me in the back waiting for a real room. I was hooked up to monitors, which is a requirement for all VBACs, and an IV to get antibiotics since I was GBS+. I spent the next few hours laboring in all different positions and trying to chat with my mom and Adam in between contractions. Around 3pm the contractions starting spacing from 3-4 minutes apart to 8 minutes apart. I told Susan and she said it was nothing to be concerned about because it was likely my body just trying to give itself a needed rest. At that point, Susan went off duty and Heather came on.

At 5pm I was transferred into a real labor room and Heather came in to talk to me. My contractions were still spaced after 2 hours and they were totally irregular in length. She checked me and I was 4-5cm. I couldn’t believe I had barely progressed and my contractions were doing less instead of more. Heather suggested that it was time to start a very low dose of Pitocin to see what would happen. She also recommended I consider an epidural. She felt that maybe resting would help me progress. I cried because I really had wanted to do it all natural and especially because I felt like the Pitocin was step one towards a c-section. I had lost all hope that the VBAC would happen. I finally gave in to the epi. They came in almost immediately. The epi sucked. To make it more fun, after they got it it in, they realized it was leaking and they had to rip it out and do it all over again. After the epi was in, the Pitocin was started by my nurse. Heather cam back in and told me to keep positive because she really believed this was going to work. She promised Pitocin or not I was on no kind of clock as long as everyone was in good shape. I tried to rest, but it was hard. I only got short naps in here and there. I watched some TV in between.

I lost track of time at this point, but I’m guessing it was around 8pm when Heather checked me again. I was 5cm. I was ready to lose it. I felt like I was never going to progress. Heather told me that the next time she was going to check me was when I felt like I needed to push. Then she broke my water. Ben’s head rushed down immediately from -2 station to 0 station. She said that was excellent progress and that the pressure from his head was going to go a long way in helping to finish the progression. My fluid was deemed to be crystal clear and Meconium free. A little while later, my nurse rushed in and screamed at me to roll over and she threw an oxygen mask on me. I thought that it was over and I would be wheeled to the ER for sure & I was panicing about what was happening to my baby. Heather came in and told me to relax. She said that my water breaking and his head moving down so quickly just caused him to freak out a little and his heartrate dipped slightly. It went back up very quickly and all was deemed to be well. The nurse rushed in a couple of times after that with the same routine and it made me so nervous. I sent my mom out to find Heather to see if there was something they were hiding from me. My mom came back with Heather who apologized for the high strung nurse. A few minutes later my new nurse came in to introduce herself.

I think it was around 10pm that I started to feel so much pain, mostly on my right side. It was a pressure, but it was sharp and it got sharper as the contractions came. I had to moan through each one. I was in more pain than I had been with the contractions before the epidural. The pressure was really, really bad. I honestly felt like my whole bottom was just going to blow out. Again, I had no concept of time at this point, but after what felt like forever going through that pain, my mother came over to me and freaked because she said I was extremely warm. She called the nurse in who determined that my temp was over 104 degrees. Once again, I thought it was over and I ‘d be rushed off to the ER. Heather came in and checked me and I was at 7cm. She had be sit the bed up and change positions while the nurse put cold washclothes on me and Adam helped me sip water. I could feel myself cooling off. The change in position helped make the pressure more bearable too.

The next time I saw Heather she was in scrubs. I think it was a little after 12:30am. She checked and I was 9cm with only a small bit of cervix left. One of the back-up docs came in to check me as well and she asked me to do a couple small practice pushes. I did and Heather then announced “Okay you’re 10cm we’re going to get ready.” Suddenly the room was being prepped. I couldn’t believe I had made it. I began to mentally prepare for a couple of hours of pushing. Adam grabbed one leg and the nurse had the other. I still clearly remember what it felt like as his head moved lower and lower. I pushed as hard as I could and I remember thinking how strange it was that I just kind of knew how to do it. There was also a couple of nurses from NICU in the room which I later found out was because when I started pushing, Heather started seeing Meconium. I remember hearing them say “Wow she’s doing great. What has it been 10 minutes?” That gave me strength. The only negative experience I had with pushing was when I suddenly got really dizzy and went black for a split second. I was given oxygen and then I was fine, but it scared me for that second. Then I remember Heather saying to my mother “Hey mom if you want to see the head look now.” I asked if he was really coming because I thought maybe they were all lying to me when they said I was doing great because they didn't want me to be discouraged. I asked if he was really coming out and Heather told me to reach down and feel his head. Wow. I really could feel it right there. A little more pushing and I felt the head come out. I was told that if I pushed again he would be out. Then he was there and crying. It was absolutely the most amazing moment of my life.

Benjamin Joseph entered the world at 1:34am on April 9, 2009. It was 25 hours from the first contraction to birth and I pushed for a total of 34 minutes and ended up with two minor superficial internal tears. Benjamin weighed 8lbs 6oz and he was 20 inches long at birth. He was quickly examined by the NICU team while I delievered the placenta. I remember feeling a rip and then a plop. Heather showed me the placenta and I really thought it was an amazing little thing. Benjamin was handed to me for the first time. He was so tiny and adorable. He looked just like his Daddy. I was instantly in love. The whole experience was amazing. I am so proud and thrilled that I had a successful VBAC and most of all, I am so thrilled to have my sweet son with me.

Message edited 2/18/2014 11:48:07 PM.

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

That was amazing !! Good job ! I am so happy for you ,Congrats

I absolutely love the Stony Brook Midwives !! Kareem delivered DD#1 and #3

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Wow! Thanks for sharing your story! Congrats again! I am so happy that you were able to have the VBAC that yo uwanted! So glad that Benjamin is here!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Thank you for sharing and for all the detail! I am so glad you were able to have the VBAC you wanted. Congratulations!!!!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congratulations!!!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congratulations on the birth of your son Benjamin Joseph. Thank you so much for sharing your vbac story. It gives me hope that I can do it too. Now that you have a c-s and a vbac which recovery was easier?

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Posted by LSP2005

Congratulations on the birth of your son Benjamin Joseph. Thank you so much for sharing your vbac story. It gives me hope that I can do it too. Now that you have a c-s and a vbac which recovery was easier?

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

congrats

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Thanks for sharing!!! CONGATS!!!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congrats!!!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

This is an amazing birth story! Thank you for writing it

Congratulations on your -- I hope my birth goes as well as yours did.

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Chills!! Thanks for taking the time to write that amazing story. I'm happy to hear that you and Benjamin did so well. Congratulations to you and your family!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congrats!!
Thank you for sharing your story

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congratulations! What a fantastic story...

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congrats!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

I love full detailed stories. You brought back memories for me. en you feel that pressure it's like your uterus is going to escape your body. lol

I am so glad your VBAC was a true success!!!

Congrats to your whole family.

Happy Birthday Ben!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

So glad that things went the way you wanted!!
Congrats on the arrival of Benjamin Joseph!!!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

congratulations!!! I love the name, that's excatly my baby's name.

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congratulations to you and your family and welcome Benjamin Joseph!!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

Congrats! What a great birth story!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

thank you for sharing your story. Congrats on your beautiful baby boy!

Re: The birth of Benjamin Joseph

What a beautiful story! Congratulations on your newest bundle of love! He is adorable! Welcome to the world Benjamin!!