Career-Minded Mates: Dealing When He Or She Spends More Time At The Office Than At Home

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

One of the biggest issues couples face, besides getting use to each other (and in-laws) is money.

Even if there’s plenty of it, finances can be a point of contention. From who makes more, to how many hours are spent on the job (and away from home) money is often the root of many marital evils.

Having a workaholic, overachieving spouse who places career at the top of the priority list, despite the perks of the money, or one who is vehemently working his or her way to the top, spending more hours at the office than with us, can be challenging to say the least.

And, while many may joke that an “absentee” spouse is the ideal deal in a relationship, for others, in the situation, it can leave you feeling less grounded, more anxious, and sometimes like a single spouse or parent. And, that’s why experts assert that its imperative to find quality time to spend together, especially if you want to grow closer rather than potentially further apart.

Professionals suggest actually treating your relationship like you would any other commitment/obligation, and even suggest blocking off some (quality) time to spend with each other. Plus, you’ll need to redefine quality couple time.

They note that after a long day of work, it’s likely you’re both too tired for “romance” and watching the nightly news together or going grocery shopping doesn’t count. Instead, try literally scheduling some time to bond, such as by setting the alarm for an hour or so earlier on the weekend so you can simply cuddle, talk, or do whatever comes naturally without the “anxiety” of the day ahead and without feeling rushed. If you work close by each other, try to meet for lunch of an after work coffee at least once a week. And, don’t forget about getting out and doing something “fun”, preferably “without” the family.

The more positive experiences you have together, the less frustrating it will be when meetings run late, when your spouse misses dinner (again) or when other obligations, which take your mate away from you, come up.

Furthermore, you can keep the love and passion alive with spicy emails, voicemails, or text messages. And, when you’re at home alone, use your “private” time wisely. Either do something nice for your spouse or take advantage of your “freedom” and head to the gym, meet up with family or friends, take a class, whatever it takes to make YOUR downtime more rewarding and exciting and gives you something to look forward to and share with your spouse.

Long Island Money & Careers Articles > Career-Minded Mates: Dealing When He Or She Spends More Time At The Office Than At Home