sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join UPDATE***

So after 4 sonos and a roller coaster of emotions, it turns out there is def no heartbeat and our little bean stopped progressing

Im about 10 weeks at this point and scheduled for a dnc on wed.

I'm super nervous about the whole thing, being put under, having the actual procedure, not being "on point" for my ds.

I've been kind of hoping my body would do this on it's own and I feel a little bit crampy this morning. I'm starting to think I should be careful for what I wish for.

Has anyone been scheduled for a dnc and started miscarrying on there own first? what happens? do they still do a dnc or let you go on your own?

anyone ever have a dnc?

sorry for all the questions

this just sux and i'm scared and I just want this over

big to everyone on this board. I'm sorry we are all here


****UPDATE ***** at bottom

Message edited 8/14/2009 8:58:05 AM.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

I am so sorry for your loss.

I am new here too... never wanted to be here, but it was always a big fear of mine since we had so much trouble getting pregnant in the first place.

For me, the D&C was the right thing to do. I could not have handled that pain on my own, and with the D&C the hospital is able to do testing on the tissue to try and determine what went wrong. I need answers so that option was the best for me. I also wanted closure and to be able to start TTC again as quickly as possible.

I did start to miscarry the evening before my D&C was scheduled. It was painful and I was so happy that I had the D&C scheduled for the very next day rather than longer into the future so that I wouldn't have to go through that on my own... but every woman is different and some women prefer to miscarry naturally... but it is devastating either way.

Again, so sorry for your loss.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

So sorrrrrrrrry that you are here Having a miscarriage really is a roller coaster. Your hormones will continue to go up and down so hang on. I had a D&C about a week after I miscarried. I knew I miscarried on my own, heavy bleeding, cramping, clots, etc. But, the D&C really cleans you out sort to speak. So, it is probably best that you have it regardless of whether your body does it. The procedure itself is pretty quick, about a half hour I think. I vividly remember shaking and crying on the table and I had an extremely comforting nurse that held my hand when I went under and was holding my hand when I woke up. I spent the rest of that day in bed. I bled for probably one day and then spotted alittle for a couple days after. For me, it was more emotional pain than the physical. Heck, I still cry when I think about it. But, I know it has made me stronger than ever and when I finally do have a baby I will be more grateful knowing the path that I've had to take. Hang in there and FM me if you ever need to ask more questions or to talk about it.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Oh, I'm so sorry!

Yes, this happened to me right around 10 weeks (although we knew it was a likely m/c at 8 weeks). My D&C was scheduled for later in the week, I think a Tuesday, and I began miscarrying on Saturday.

The cramping was very bad at times, but not unbearable by any means. The only reason I called my doctor that evening was to see if I could take Advil or something, as I was advised at the pre-surgical testing not to take any sort of aspirin prior to the D&C. She then phoned in a prescription for cytotec which is a drug meant to contract the uterus and help the m/c along. I took that as a suppository and it was absolutely fine despite my terror upon reading anecdotes on the internet!

I went back to the doctor on Monday, and most of it was over. My doctor "finished" it I guess and I also took the cytotec again, orally this time. I was successfully able to avoid the D&C which I was absolutely petrifed of!

Got my period back a month later and I've been fine since then...6 mos. later.

I hope for a speedy recovery and emotional peace for you...

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

debbie i am so very sorry

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Oh no.... I'm so sorry for your loss

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

I am so sorry for your loss. It is such a sad and scary time and I have to say it helped for me to be on this site. The women here were so helpful, supportive and a wealth of knowlege. If there is anything I can do please let me know.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

i am so sorry for your loss..
i miscarried 2x naturally, but i just wanted to give you hugs.. i know its such a emotional rollercoaster. its just an awful experience all together. take the time and get all the support from your loved ones.. it truly helps!

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Thank you all so much for your advice and hugs. I just got back from the Dr and went to the br and now of course there is some blood. I called him back and he said if I start bleeding heavily, they'll admit me through the ER to do the dnc immediately. Ugh, this just really sux.

I'm so sorry for those of you that have already gone through this or are experiencing this now as well

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

I am so so sorry for your loss!

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Im so sorry

Mine stopped developing at 7 weeks. I had the D&C 2 weeks ago. I was really scared ESPECIALLY having to be put out since I never had to be before nor have I ever even had any minor procedures done.

I have to say, Im glad I did it. The procedure only took like 20 mins. I was at LIJ. All the doctors and nurses were amazingly compassionate. Going under wasnt even a big deal; next thing you know youre awake in recovery.

I could have waited and possibly miscarried on my own but I couldnt see putting myself through that. It was such a head game; praying for weeks you dont bleed then suddenly hoping to bleed. Everytime I went to the bathroom and didnt see even the tiniest trace of blood; I died a little inside knowing I was PG but I really wasnt

2 weeks later, I feel (physically) very well. I even think I might be ovulating. Emotionally Im still crushed but I have to admit that the D&C ables you to move on a lot faster and now that its over and I feel better, Im just looking forward to trying again.

Im here if you have any other questions or just want to talk

Message edited 8/10/2009 7:57:53 PM.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Posted by Lisa982006

Im so sorry

Mine stopped developing at 7 weeks. I had the D&C 2 weeks ago. I was really scared ESPECIALLY having to be put out since I never had to be before nor have I ever even had any minor procedures done.


I could have waited and possibly miscarried on my own but I couldnt see putting myself through that. It was such a head game; praying for weeks you dont bleed then suddenly hoping to bleed. Everytime I went to the bathroom and didnt see even the tiniest trace of blood; I died a little inside knowing I was PG but I really wasnt

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

I am so sorry you're going through this right now

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Posted by Little-J-Mommy

Posted by Lisa982006

Im so sorry

Mine stopped developing at 7 weeks. I had the D&C 2 weeks ago. I was really scared ESPECIALLY having to be put out since I never had to be before nor have I ever even had any minor procedures done.


I could have waited and possibly miscarried on my own but I couldnt see putting myself through that. It was such a head game; praying for weeks you dont bleed then suddenly hoping to bleed. Everytime I went to the bathroom and didnt see even the tiniest trace of blood; I died a little inside knowing I was PG but I really wasnt

Thank you for posting this.....it is exactly how I feel I'm so sorry that you have to go through it as well.

Thank you for the reassurance that it does get better

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

Im so so sorry...

I lost my last PG at 13 weeks and I was bleeding heavily in the ER and even passed the baby or tissue of the baby on my own but I still had the D & C. It really helps your uterus contract and go back to its normal state faster....and reduces any risk of hemmorage etc. I DID NOT want it, but my Dr. Kinda explained it all to me and seemed the right choice. It was fast , I was awake for mine ( by choice, I had drinken something right before and would have needed to be intubated for it and was DEAD against that , so they allowed me to stay awake)...It took all of 4-5 minutes tops from start to finish.

The next 2 days were crampy and painful and then I was fine.

Emotionally thats a different story....And I will pray you find the strength to stay strong. So sorry again.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

I didn't have a dnc with either of my losses so I don't have any advice there, but just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. Its a terrible, terrible thing to go thru and I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

I am so sorry for your loss.
I have had 2 D&C and M/C naturally once. For me the D&C was much easier and it's not bad at all. like the PP said you can have testing done on the tissue to see if there was a chromosome issue or not. In my case that is really why i decided to do it--even though I never got any results from the testing, I am happy i went that route.
good luck to you and again I am so sorry

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join

well....it's over

I started miscarrying on my own. I was spotting on Monday and then it really started Tuesday. My OB said to just stick with my Wed. appt for the DNC. I went in for a 1pm surgery and was home by 4:30. Everything went smoothly, thank God. I got home and took a nap until about 6:30 when I finally got a little hungry. Yesterday was ok....just trying to take it easy. Today seems more of the same. I have a follow up with my OB in 2 weeks.

In the mean time, I have a few questions...

How long do you bleed for?

How long after you stopped did you get your first AF?

I just want to be back to normal.

Thank you for all your hugs and support and for sharing your experiences with me. It means more to me than I can say

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join UPDATE***

I'm sorry I don't have any answers to your questions, just wanted to send you some hugs. I am so very sorry for your loss.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join UPDATE***

I am so sorry for your loss....

After my D&C , I probably bled for around a week or so, and I got AF after 6 weeks.

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join UPDATE***

Re: sad to be part of this "club" that no one wants to join UPDATE***

I am so sorry for your loss. I had a D & C in April & was not given the option to do it naturally. I hope you can find the comfort you need here with us.