It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

I posted a couple of months ago and it is not getting any better.

Ever since having kids my yorkies have become spiteful, specifically since DS #2 was born. My male dog snarls and snips at my older son. My female dog is peeing all over my house. I have tried crating them and my male dog pee's and poops in his crate. He also poops all over my house randomly.

After 9 months I can't take it anymore. They should be adjusted by now. My parents hate my dogs because when they watch my boys they are cleaning up after them. DH hates them because they are ruining our house and our male dog is mean to our older son.

I found a Yorkie Rescue based out of NJ and have looked into them and they are super strict with adoptions. The woman has been doing this for 30+ yrs and said Yorkies and kids dont always mix...that I cannot make my dogs like my kids and that if my dogs are no longer happy in my home they are not going to change. I just can't bring myself to do it. I LOVE my dogs!!!! As much as I complain and as much as I get upset with them I know it is because they want and need attention and are jealous of my kids. But my kids aren't going away. The situation isn't going to change. Should I be selfish and keep my dogs even though they are obviously not happy here or do the "right" thing and let a family with no kids who can give them 100% attention adopt them?

I get so confused because they might be good for a week and I feel like we are getting somewhere and things have changed but than it's like they take 3 steps back and are bad for a month after that. Just today my dog pee'd in the baby's room AGAIN.

I am so upset

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

why not try training? i think adopting out should be the very last option. try the training, if it doesn't work, then give them up.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Time to send a tape to Cesar. Last resort? It's worth a shot.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

where did you get them trained? that's always an issue. if you didn't go to a good enough trainer, that could effect it. i'd give best friends dog training a chance. they do free evaluations and you can ask the trainers what they think. they won't tell you to do the training if they think the dogs just won't stop being the way they are. they use e collars and i'm telling you, that could really save this situation

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

5/29/08: I need advice...I don't know what to do anymore

4/19/09: I don't know what to do anymore

10/28/09: Have you ever tried to find a new home for your dog

12/30/09: What do I do now?


After reading all of your threads, I'm getting the idea that you don't want to invest the time or money to train them once and for all. A few hours of professional training 2 years ago doesn't count anymore. You've said you refuse to spend more money on them because they're untrainable, and then in another thread that you just don't have the money to spend.

Whichever it is, you have gotten a lot of replies, and there are no new suggestions anyone can give you. Two years have gone by, yet nothing has changed.

You need to make a decision and follow through. You're not doing them any favors by letting so much time go by without taking any action on these problems. You need to stop complaining, stop blaming, and TRULY make an effort to hire a behaviorist and/or a trainer and invest time EVERY DAY into your dogs. If they don't work, get another one. Your whole family should be working with you on training, every day. That's what it takes. It doesn't matter at all how they used to be before you had children, it means nothing anymore. You chose a breed, twice, that has difficulty dealing with change. It's not the dog's fault you weren't prepared for that.

If you can't or won't find the time to exhaust all training options, find them a new home now. Not in six months, not in a year, now.

Before you tell me I'm judgmental again, I'm not. I am being brutally honest and I'm not sugar-coating my response to protect your feelings. It's time you make it truly about the dogs, not how you feel about them. I don't encourage people to "get rid of" their dogs much but looking at the whole situation, it sounds like the best option for your dogs. Staying in a home that they are clearly unhappy in, without constant and consistent discipline or attention, is only hurting them more. Not to mention the dangerous situation your children are in when their aggressive behavior is not curbed.

Message edited 6/6/2010 9:02:03 AM.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Message edited 6/6/2010 6:02:08 PM.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

they're "shock" collars (more like vibrate) but can be used with tiny dogs like that. i actually think green freak was making a good point. if you have had these problems for the past 2 years and you aren't willing to get a good trainer, then it's time to look into rehoming them. it's not fair to the dogs to live so miserably and the longer you wait, the more damage you're doing to the dogs and the older they get, the less adoptable they are unfortunately. i would really try best friends. it's a free consultation, there's no harm in doing it. if you've made up your mind you no longer want them, i can get in touch with my rescue group and see if they'll take them in but i would exhaust all other options first unless you truly don't want them anymore

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Have you looked into BarkBusters? It's a few hundred up front, but with a lifetime guarantee- meaning, they'll come out and do additional training as needed for the life of the dog(s).

Something absolutely has to give here. You've been posting about these issues for 2 years and are still dealing with the same behaviors. I know it doesn't feel good to have it put in your face, but you said yourself you've forgotten about those posts. Maybe this will give you the push to be more proactive.

Having 2 toddlers (and a third on the way) and a dog, I TOTALLY understand how difficult it is to balance it all. We came close to rehoming Luna when she showed some mild aggression toward our eldest. We got Bark Busters in and life has been much better, and safer.

I often feel bad for Luna because she really HAS slipped down the priority list attention-wise. But, we love her and try to make the time to show her that. As my girls have gotten older, they're really starting to enjoy Luna's presence and she theirs (especially at dinner time ).

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

I have written this before on the pet board, but as someone who rescued a bulldog from a Rescue group from someone who no longer could care for him, I think if that is the final steps that you take (after exhausting all others), then you have done the best to give them the life THEY deserve.

By the way, if the rescue group is from NJ, I can always ask my rescue group if they know them and whether they can vouch. Mine was really strict - home visits, recommendations, trial period, etc.

Feel free to FM me.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

I would definitely try to rehome them.

They'll be much happier, and so will you. Don't let anyone try to guilt-trip you into trying to train them first. You've tried that, it obviously did not work.

I've never owned a dog, but I've had the same issues with territorial marking with cats. No matter what we tried, it continued. There comes a point where it's not only frustrating and expensive to keep having to clean up the messes, but where actually keeping the animals causes more undue stress than it is worth.

I think at this point you have done everything you can do, and it's time to make the situation better, for yourself, your family AND your dogs.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

kara, they are not SHOCK collars, they are VIBRATION collars. you can ask i believe her name is mrskellybride on here, she uses best friends and she has 2 tiny dogs. you don't put it on high settings. you put it to a setting where your dog will LISTEN to you. it's like a tap on the shoulder. it's not cruel, and in this case, she SHOULD use this option. her dogs are not only listening to her but didn't she say they're nipping at her kids?? i would think this is an extreme case. and if she doesn't want to get rid of them but doesn't know what to do with them, she should go another route. and your story about the mastiff, i'm sure that was a real SHOCK collar and it was turned up all of the way.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Kim, do you still have this collar that you got from them? If so, can you give me the brand name/model of it? There's no information about it on their website and I figured it was quicker to ask you than them.

As long as, even on the highest setting of your collar, it's only delivering a vibration and not a shock, I might be interested. To me, that's like putting a phone on vibrate and pressing it to your dog's neck. That kind of painless approach I'm all for, just to get their attention.

I'm not for, as you know, the type of collars that deliver an electric shock and that's my prerogative. I'm not discussing that.

I do all my own training and Brinkley was a piece of cake compared to Ginger. With her insane prey drive, she's highly distractable. It might be time for me to look for training aids.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Hey, it's by dogtra, i believe it's an 1800 model but i'm not 100 percent sure

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

Ok, last off-topic reply, I promise...

It's annoying that so many online resources are ambiguous on if the collars vibrate, shock, or both. I found one resource that says the Dogtra models that end in "P" have the vibrating feature as well as the shock feature. That must be one of the models you have, since you use it for vibrations instead of shocks.

Interestingly, the majority of information I'm finding on vibrate-only collars are for deaf dogs. Considering we are teaching hand signals as well as verbals, this seems to be the best option. Plus, the collars that only vibrate are cheaper than the vibrate/shock ones! Unfortunately, it appears Dogtra doesn't sell something like that so I have to do more research.

Thanks for the info Kimmie.

Re: It's not getting any better...what do you do when your dogs hate your kids?

well, we'll have to agree to disagree on the shock collar topic.