Kinda sad

I was talking to the mom of one of my son's classmates about setting up a playdate and we were talking about the school and she mentioned all the party invitations that her son was getting.

My DS hasn't gotten one since school started.

I feel so bad for him. He really only plays with one other boy and I ask if he talks to the other boys in the class and he says no.

I know lack of socail skills is all my fault because he's had limited playdates over the years because I'm pretty shy and its really hard for me to just approach or call another mom to try to set something up.

The teacher has been working with him to help him make friends but i guess from the lack of party invitations its not working.

He's played T-Ball and Soccer but doesn't really make friend at those activities either.

I don't know what to do. i don't want hom to be the outcast in the class.

Re: Kinda sad

How old is he?

I always say that growing pains are really for the parents. It hurts to see your child navigate through social situations.

If he's younger (4-5ish), I'd say that it was likely friendships from pre-school. I do think stepping up playdates at home would definitely help the situation. I'll do things like call classmates on a snowy day & ask if we can take the sleigh riding or to lasertag...then we come back to the house where they play for an hour or two (or four). I think having an activity first helps give them something to talk about & breaks the ice a little.

You should also contact the school counselor to see if there are other groups that he can join. While sports is great for bonding, some schools have "friendship groups" for this specific purporse. I had my chlid join one too. They've been invited on playdates & birthday parties but having them hear about "having no friends" & how they are playing independently, I thought they could use some help in learning how to foster friendships more.

Re: Kinda sad

That would make me sad too. Barb had some good points.

Re: Kinda sad

DS is 5 and in a class that only has about 5 or 6 boys in it.

Re: Kinda sad

In the beginning, my kid had friends because of me. I scheduled LOTS of playdates after school and over the weekend.
You need to put yourself out there. Especially if he does not. Once he establishes a few friends, he will gain the confidence to gain more on his own.

Re: Kinda sad

Re: Kinda sad

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by MM2004

DS is 5 and in a class that only has about 5 or 6 boys in it.

Based on his age, I'd say a lot of them are pre-school friends or friends of their mom.

Definitely step up on the playdates.