Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

How does that work? I couldn't imagine going through something like that and not confiding in my family and friends. They were all so amazing during the entire thing.

If you didn't tell people you were pregnant, did you let them know when you lost the baby?

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

i only told my 4 best friends after the fact...

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

My mother told my Aunt after I miscarried. I didn’t tell her I was preggo, but I think my mom wanted to talk about it with someone besides me.
And we told DH’s cousin and her husband the other night over dinner. I don’t know how it got brought up. But it turns out she knew already- DH’s Aunt told her.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

yes, i told quite a few people after the fact. There are some people that i'd rather know we are "trying" or were "trying", then to think we only plan on having one child, if that makes sense.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

I had only told my parents and one of my sisters that I was pregnant and then I miscarried so I had to start back tracking ....called the rest of family and told them I had miscarried and yes I had been pregnant for 10 weeks but no longer

One of my sisters said after my news had sunk in "but I never got to say congratulations to you and that makes me so sad "

So yes its kind of weird to basically say I was but now I am not.

I only plan on telling immediate family and a few close friends and thats it.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

to be honest the only people I told after the fact were people who were harping or asking or making a lot of comments about us having a baby.

after our loss we were trying for what seemed like forever (in actuality it was over 9 months) and I just couldn't take hearing the same questions from the same people over and over again.

I'll tell ya though... that shut them right up and they never asked me anything about it again. I never felt weird for telling them or bad about telling them like that either. It really got my point across.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

With my first pregnancy, I carried to 17wks so people knew I was pregnant ......... with the triplets, not everyone knew but I did tell some people after the fact. I found it was good to have the support, because I was really sad

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

nobody knew.....i was going to tell everyone on christmas and i started to bleed on christmas so i didn't say anything. it was a long time before i told anyone, and even then....most people don't know.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

My mom knew I was pg, I had to tell her because I needed her to watch ds. Mil found out after it was over. No one else knows, i mentioned in passing to my aunt thst I mc, it was more to almost shut her up to stop asking when #2 was coming.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

I didnt tell anyone till after the fact. (Only my sisters knew and 2 friends). I didnt have good news from the beginning (dr. said it didnt look viable from 6 weeks on) so I kept it a secret.

Then after it was all said and done I decided to tell my friends. I just felt so down and needed some support. Plus a lot of people knew we were TTC or guess that we were and some people were saying "when are you going to have a baby" so I had to put the cabash on that. I still have a few more people to tell but am just telling them slowly and one at a time.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

Message edited 6/6/2011 2:22:35 PM.

Re: Spinoff - if you didn't tell people you were pregnant - did you tell them you had a miscarriage?

We didnt tell anyone we were preggers. I only told 1 friend I had M/C b/c I was supposed to go see her while I was in the process of the act and I totally blew her off. I felt guilty and owed her an explanation. She was totally cool and very supportive.

I have another friend who wont stop talking about us having a baby. She is older than me (early 40's) and has 2 teenagers. I was on the verge of telling her just to get her off my freaking back when she confided in me (over a bottle of wine) that she wishes she could have another baby and wants to live through us. I know she has no idea as to how makes me feel so I decided to let it go.