Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

DS is now 4 yo.

I have to admit that I have coccooned him since he was diagnosed.

He had OT/PT for weak/low tone muscles. Not much strength.

But I have to say that I have learned to just let him experience. Like yeah buddy you can pull yourself on that bouncer. DH and I would be the only parents in a bouncer with our child. But it did work at the time since he was too weak to prop/pull himself up and we still wanted him to experience.

It took some time but he is getting stronger. I let him try new things. I am not as overly protective.

And that has made a World of difference.

He broke his bed rail on his twin bed. OK... well that's that. So I told him to make sure hes does not fall. And guess what. He does not. I put a pillow on the floor at the beginning. I think he sled off 1 night. But that's it!

I so under estimated my son on so many levels. And while he is low functioning. I treat him just like a typical child. We have to wait in line at Adventureland. I mean reasonable 1 turn wait. We learn to take turn. And tantrums will only mean that we leave and that's it. He is being told where the spoons are if he wants a yogurt and get it himself.

It's where to put your clothes in the hamper, etc...

No more babying him! And he can do it!

We started eating out with him at the pizza place. It's about learning to be quiet, sitting properly, etc..

I am my own worst enemy. I need to trust him. And just because he cannot talk does not mean he cannot do things.

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

I think that's great that your doing it! Hard yes, I know but they really can do it

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

I totally understand where you are coming from. We started to make him do things on his own, so he is not always relying on us. Our big thing is going places. We go everywhere now, slowly eating out, because chris has a hard time anything still. But I say...if he tantrums ....oh well. I want him to experience so much. It takes a lot to do what we do.

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

We do the same thing. We started treating DS like our other two kids. When I went to parent training at his preschool this summer, he was lying on the floor and wouldn't sit in his chair. Two TA's were trying to coax him into the chair and used crackers as his reinforcer. Well, as soon as he laid eyes on me he jumped right up and got into the chair. The TA's thought it was great. I told them we don't do this cracker reinforcement for basics. If you say sit, he needs to sit. That was the moment I knew what we were doing was right. He knows exaclty what he's doing. Now we just have to make sure he does what is right.

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

It's amazing what they can do when we stop doing for them. I struggle with this at times too. I am trying to be more conscious of letting him do things himself. Glad EJ is making such strides!! He's such a sweet, adorable little guy

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

Yeah those little ones take in so much, it's so amazing to watch, especially when language is limited. Don't ever mistake lack of speech for lack of knowing. Those brains absorb incredible amounts !

I also think you are an amazing mom to be able to know when to step back and when to step in !

So happy for your little guy's progress !!!!

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

for you and your DS!!!

My struggle is trying to keep DD from doing too much. She doesn't know her limitations, and often gets hurt, or gets into too much stuff!

Re: Just wanted to share some observation about DS and "letting go"

Don't get me wrong! I WAS overprotective and still am. He is now 4yo and I am FINALLY trying to let go. It took me that long to trust him (to some limit!) and trust myself.

It's a journey with challenges everyday! We are so into his therapies, school, progresses that sometimes it's hard NOT to get involved in every move the makes. But like with any kid, they have to learn and WE have to learn that they need to let go of our hand even if they are just next to us still.