Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by aliwnec10

so then is having a registry appropriate because you're telling someone what to buy you?

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

My personal opinion is this & i get that not everyone will agree...

I think that some people forget the meaning behind weddings & showers. And MHO... i hate that there are all these traditional rules and proper etiquette rules that you should go by. To me, times change and what works for one... may not work for all.

Weddings/showers are very stressful and they really shouldn't be at all. It should be fun for the bride. So i think that if the bride wants a certain type of wedding/shower... than why not?? And those that don't agree with it or don't understand it, have no right to be judgemental about it. To each their own. In the large scheme of things... does it really matter???? I think there are larger things to worry about in life than wrapping paper versus no wrapping paper on a gift.

(okay i'm done, don't worry).

Message edited 3/27/2007 11:36:19 AM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Great idea. I have to tell you I think that is the worst part of showers, I did not want it at any of mine and lost that battle. Id rather have a few mimosis and chat.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by suvenR

Posted by aliwnec10

so then is having a registry appropriate because you're telling someone what to buy you?

It used to be considered inappropriate, but it's entirely the norm by today's standards.

We can debate back and forth what is appropriate in today's society versus what is not.

However, I am still not got going to change my opinion how I fell about telling someone how to wrap a gift.

I think we should agree to disagree on this one, ok?

Message edited 3/27/2007 11:39:03 AM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by aliwnec10


Absolutely! Believe it or not, i wasn't trying to be argumentative or anything. I was just simply giving the other side to things. To each their own.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

My mother refuses to go to showers that do this. As soon as she gets an invite with "open viewing" she and won't go.

I personally LOVED opening gifts.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

Message edited 3/27/2007 12:20:30 PM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

I didn't have a wedding shower, because I didn't want one, so forgive my ignorance......

Out of curiosity, how many people did you have at a wedding shower where it took you 3 hours to open gifts? I don't think as a bride I would have been able to handle that

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by Lisa

I wonder if you have to have clear envelopes so those that gave checks or Gift Certs can show their gifts also!!

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

Message edited 3/27/2007 12:41:06 PM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by diva7531

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

OK, here's my opinion. When I first heard of this I thought "Great Idea!" I've been to a 100+ person party and it sucks! I got to see the mom to be for 5 seconds and her mom for 2 minutes. I go to childrens parties all the time and they don't open gifts, ever! Is that rude? I agree with an above poster, in that tradition is for those who want to follow it. The appreciation of the gift is in the Thank You card you recieve afterward. I have seen some people open gifts and others not. I still know they appreciated it because they told me so afterward. Most of the people at my shower will be local, but I hope I have some time to spend with my guests. I left it up to the moms and BP since they are throwing it. Opening gifts is great, but I think it's better to spend quality time with people other than things. JMHO

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by diva7531

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

OK, here's my opinion. When I first heard of this I thought "Great Idea!" I've been to a 100+ person party and it sucks! I got to see the mom to be for 5 seconds and her mom for 2 minutes. I go to childrens parties all the time and they don't open gifts, ever! Is that rude? I agree with an above poster, in that tradition is for those who want to follow it. The appreciation of the gift is in the Thank You card you recieve afterward. I have seen some people open gifts and others not. I still know they appreciated it because they told me so afterward. Most of the people at my shower will be local, but I hope I have some time to spend with my guests. I left it up to the moms and BP since they are throwing it. Opening gifts is great, but I think it's better to spend quality time with people other than things. JMHO

So, I am just wondering, you invite 50-100 people to your shower, they bring a gift and leave it in a pile just so you can have conversation with them.....

How much conversation can you have with ALL those people? At my shower I visited with each table and had nice conversation with everyone, and still opened gifts. And I opened my gifts myself.

Remember, your guests are also there to spend time with each other, some people they haven't seen in a while.

No one will convince me that it is polite to not open a gift I gave you in front of me.

When I go to a party and gifts aren't being opened, I wait until the end, get my gift and have them open it.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by diva7531

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

OK, here's my opinion. When I first heard of this I thought "Great Idea!" I've been to a 100+ person party and it sucks! I got to see the mom to be for 5 seconds and her mom for 2 minutes. I go to childrens parties all the time and they don't open gifts, ever! Is that rude? I agree with an above poster, in that tradition is for those who want to follow it. The appreciation of the gift is in the Thank You card you recieve afterward. I have seen some people open gifts and others not. I still know they appreciated it because they told me so afterward. Most of the people at my shower will be local, but I hope I have some time to spend with my guests. I left it up to the moms and BP since they are throwing it. Opening gifts is great, but I think it's better to spend quality time with people other than things. JMHO

So, I am just wondering, you invite 50-100 people to your shower, they bring a gift and leave it in a pile just so you can have conversation with them.....

How much conversation can you have with ALL those people? At my shower I visited with each table and had nice conversation with everyone, and still opened gifts. And I opened my gifts myself.

Remember, your guests are also there to spend time with each other, some people they haven't seen in a while.

No one will convince me that it is polite to not open a gift I gave you in front of me.

When I go to a party and gifts aren't being opened, I wait until the end, get my gift and have them open it.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

I think this is a great idea. Showers where you have to sit around and watch people open gifts are soooo boring to me.

I would stick a big fat pretty bow on each gift, a gift card/tag and be done with it.

This is a win-win situation for guests IMO. Not only would I not have to sit through 2 boring hrs of oohing and aaahing, I don't even have to wrap!

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by aliwnec10

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by diva7531

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

OK, here's my opinion. When I first heard of this I thought "Great Idea!" I've been to a 100+ person party and it sucks! I got to see the mom to be for 5 seconds and her mom for 2 minutes. I go to childrens parties all the time and they don't open gifts, ever! Is that rude? I agree with an above poster, in that tradition is for those who want to follow it. The appreciation of the gift is in the Thank You card you recieve afterward. I have seen some people open gifts and others not. I still know they appreciated it because they told me so afterward. Most of the people at my shower will be local, but I hope I have some time to spend with my guests. I left it up to the moms and BP since they are throwing it. Opening gifts is great, but I think it's better to spend quality time with people other than things. JMHO

So, I am just wondering, you invite 50-100 people to your shower, they bring a gift and leave it in a pile just so you can have conversation with them.....

How much conversation can you have with ALL those people? At my shower I visited with each table and had nice conversation with everyone, and still opened gifts. And I opened my gifts myself.

Remember, your guests are also there to spend time with each other, some people they haven't seen in a while.

No one will convince me that it is polite to not open a gift I gave you in front of me.

When I go to a party and gifts aren't being opened, I wait until the end, get my gift and have them open it.

okay again... devils advocate here! i was in a bridal party and the bride to be had a shower. Well she had 400 people to her wedding. So divide that by 2 (since the majority are couples) and that's around 200 people to her bridal shower!!! And i will say that it was ridiculous!!!! how is that fair to anyone??? She spent the ENTIRE time opening gifts!

so you don't think that in some cases... to leave the presents unwrapped isn't a good thing??? I'm not saying that you shouldn't acknowledge the gift.

Honestly... if i would have been allowed... i would have rather have had a cocktail party (with no gifts) than the bridal shower. That way, everyone can have fun and i can see the people who traveled from out of town for longer than 5 minutes.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by aliwnec10

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by diva7531

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

OK, here's my opinion. When I first heard of this I thought "Great Idea!" I've been to a 100+ person party and it sucks! I got to see the mom to be for 5 seconds and her mom for 2 minutes. I go to childrens parties all the time and they don't open gifts, ever! Is that rude? I agree with an above poster, in that tradition is for those who want to follow it. The appreciation of the gift is in the Thank You card you recieve afterward. I have seen some people open gifts and others not. I still know they appreciated it because they told me so afterward. Most of the people at my shower will be local, but I hope I have some time to spend with my guests. I left it up to the moms and BP since they are throwing it. Opening gifts is great, but I think it's better to spend quality time with people other than things. JMHO

So, I am just wondering, you invite 50-100 people to your shower, they bring a gift and leave it in a pile just so you can have conversation with them.....

How much conversation can you have with ALL those people? At my shower I visited with each table and had nice conversation with everyone, and still opened gifts. And I opened my gifts myself.

Remember, your guests are also there to spend time with each other, some people they haven't seen in a while.

No one will convince me that it is polite to not open a gift I gave you in front of me.

When I go to a party and gifts aren't being opened, I wait until the end, get my gift and have them open it.

okay again... devils advocate here! i was in a bridal party and the bride to be had a shower. Well she had 400 people to her wedding. So divide that by 2 (since the majority are couples) and that's around 200 people to her bridal shower!!! And i will say that it was ridiculous!!!! how is that fair to anyone??? She spent the ENTIRE time opening gifts!

so you don't think that in some cases... to leave the presents unwrapped isn't a good thing??? I'm not saying that you shouldn't acknowledge the gift.

Honestly... if i would have been allowed... i would have rather have had a cocktail party (with no gifts) than the bridal shower. That way, everyone can have fun and i can see the people who traveled from out of town for longer than 5 minutes.

I think a 200 person bridal shower is completely ridiculous. I'm sure it wasn't that many either, but I'll play!

If there WERE that many people at a shower, than I would probably suggest that if guests WOULD LIKE TO WRAP their gifts in cellophane they CAN, due to the overwhelming # of people in attendance. Then STILL OPEN GIFTS AND SHOW THE BASKETS AND ITEMS WRAPPED THAT WAY.

If I ever saw "be a dear, wrap in clear" on my invite I would not be happy.

But hey, that's me.....to each his own!

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by aliwnec10

Posted by curliegirl

Posted by diva7531

Posted by curliegirl

IMHO, the whole wedding registry thing can be considered pretty greedy. Yes, I said greedy, in that years ago, you got what people gave you and that was that.

Would you register for your birthday?
Wouldn't that be nice!

Yes, it is easier to tell people what you like/want, and it does create an easy fix for the gift giver and receiver....fine.

HOWEVER

We are asking women to spend a significant amount of money and time to come to our showers. The least we can do is be gracious enough to acknowledge their gift, in whatever form, IN PERSON.

The only time I do not agree with the wrap in clear, is when the gift is not aknowledged. Might as well just deliver it to their house and not bother with the whole shower at all.....

When I give someone a gift for ANY reason, I want it opened in front of me.

I think I enjoy giving more than receiving for just that reason.

OK, here's my opinion. When I first heard of this I thought "Great Idea!" I've been to a 100+ person party and it sucks! I got to see the mom to be for 5 seconds and her mom for 2 minutes. I go to childrens parties all the time and they don't open gifts, ever! Is that rude? I agree with an above poster, in that tradition is for those who want to follow it. The appreciation of the gift is in the Thank You card you recieve afterward. I have seen some people open gifts and others not. I still know they appreciated it because they told me so afterward. Most of the people at my shower will be local, but I hope I have some time to spend with my guests. I left it up to the moms and BP since they are throwing it. Opening gifts is great, but I think it's better to spend quality time with people other than things. JMHO

So, I am just wondering, you invite 50-100 people to your shower, they bring a gift and leave it in a pile just so you can have conversation with them.....

How much conversation can you have with ALL those people? At my shower I visited with each table and had nice conversation with everyone, and still opened gifts. And I opened my gifts myself.

Remember, your guests are also there to spend time with each other, some people they haven't seen in a while.

No one will convince me that it is polite to not open a gift I gave you in front of me.

When I go to a party and gifts aren't being opened, I wait until the end, get my gift and have them open it.

okay again... devils advocate here! i was in a bridal party and the bride to be had a shower. Well she had 400 people to her wedding. So divide that by 2 (since the majority are couples) and that's around 200 people to her bridal shower!!! And i will say that it was ridiculous!!!! how is that fair to anyone??? She spent the ENTIRE time opening gifts!

so you don't think that in some cases... to leave the presents unwrapped isn't a good thing??? I'm not saying that you shouldn't acknowledge the gift.

Honestly... if i would have been allowed... i would have rather have had a cocktail party (with no gifts) than the bridal shower. That way, everyone can have fun and i can see the people who traveled from out of town for longer than 5 minutes.

I think a 200 person bridal shower is completely ridiculous. I'm sure it wasn't that many either, but I'll play!

If there WERE that many people at a shower, than I would probably suggest that if guests WOULD LIKE TO WRAP their gifts in cellophane they CAN, due to the overwhelming # of people in attendance. Then STILL OPEN GIFTS AND SHOW THE BASKETS AND ITEMS WRAPPED THAT WAY.

If I ever saw "be a dear, wrap in clear" on my invite I would not be happy.

But hey, that's me.....to each his own!

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

imo its rude.

people are taking their time and money to attend your shower. the least the bride can do is sit there and open the gift.

one of my BMs mentioned to me if i wanted the bp to open the gifts, then I open the card - i said absolutely NOT!

and for the whole registry thing. I find it MUCH easier to by what the bride wants. If you want to buy something not on the registry, go right ahead!

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

"Open viewing"...sounds more like an open casket at a viewing.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by lorich

"Open viewing"...sounds more like an open casket at a viewing.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

So wait... you think i'm lying??? Are you kidding me? What reason would i have to lie??


I never said you were lying, get a grip.

I invited almost 300 people to my wedding, all couples. It doesn't mean I had 150 people at my shower.
I had about 1/3 that.

Message edited 3/27/2007 3:28:49 PM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Message edited 3/27/2007 3:33:34 PM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Message edited 6/8/2009 4:02:41 PM.

Re: "Open viewing" gifts at bridal shower?

Posted by suvenR

Posted by aliwnec10

so then is having a registry appropriate because you're telling someone what to buy you?

In reference to the whole registry thing- registries are a SUGGESTION of items that you'd like to have. They aren't things that anyone HAS to buy for you, therefore you aren't TELLING someone what to buy you.