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Message edited 8/7/2011 11:48:04 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I agree Kudos to them if they can do it, but for the most part I think they are lazy and use the excuse of "being caught in the moment" crap to much. Im sorry you can get a condom next to the trident in the store so unless you are planning to get PG there should be no excuse of getting PG. Also there are so many places like planned parenthood that offer the younger girls and boys alternitive protection with some secrecy, if they cant talk to the parents. But for the most part I think they are just plain lazy.

ETA: And unfortunalty pregnancy is the least of the worries now a days, AIDS and other diseases are out and in full effect.

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:09:35 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I agree about teens not being smart about protection. I have two younger sisters and both of them have been careless as far as birth control and protection in the past. It is very frustrating. I think kids have an attitude that nothing will happen to them.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I think as long as there are teenagers who have hormones in overdrive there will be teen pregnancy.

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:09:04 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I can't imagine being a teen mother. Some have the support to get them thru it, some unfortunately don't and it's a life-long struggle.

Having a baby will make that girl grow-up real fast...and it's a shame.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

yup.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

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Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

absolutely.

It seems like some kids today don't have the fear about becoming pregnant and dealing with the consequences.

They just are in the moment - don't know the real meaning of love and it seems to have become a norm now to have a child without being married -which really is disturbing.

Re:

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Message edited 8/7/2011 11:50:02 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I was a teen mom (19) and I will say that I was not "educated" in the whole sex thing and unfortunatley got pregnant my very first time. I'm by no means using this as an excuse..because it isn't..it's a fact. I was fortunate enough that I had a GREAT job and was able to do this..and I also had the support from my family as well. However, not once did I expect for them to take over my responsibility.

Unfortunately, as stupid as it may sound..there are ALOT of OLD FASHIONED parents out there who instead of sitting their children down to explain to them the consequences of having unprotected sex, they threaten them and say "if you get pregnant or get anyone pregnant I will throw you out", as if that is going to stop them from doing it.

Now being the mom of a 16 year old boy..I completely AGREE with what each of you has said. There are alot of teen age girls out there getting pregnant (not on their own) who just don't get it. The problem with the teens of today is, they seem to think that having sex is "no big deal" and want to do it..just because everyone else has done it. They also think that anal and oral sex aren't sex. I think it's really sad..because he has told me some stories about girls he knows//knew at the age of 13 who were doing this and who have gotten pregnant.

Knock on wood...my son has not yet!! I am very open with my son..and would hope that if/when the time came he would come to me or his dad to let us know. I defenitely don't condone him having it..but if he is going to ..I'm going to make sure he has protection. The last thing I want is him being afraid to tell me anything...because that just makes it worse for them. The reality is they are going to do what they want...when they want..and all they need to know is that can come to their parents and get support if they need it. As hard as it may be...

In closing..I agree with you all. Sorry for being long winded.

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:20:44 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:23:28 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:32:41 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:39:32 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Last year I moved upstate and I see this SO MUCH here. And many of the girls see having kids as a source of INCOME and when they get the check often go shopping (eta: for themselves - not their child)

Message edited 4/27/2007 2:51:11 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I don't know the actual stats, but to me, it seems that teen pregnancies are on the rise instead of on the decline. I think that these days it has become more acceptable in a sense, to be a teen mother. Teen mothers are no longer judged as harshly. In fact, if they "make it", so to speak, they are applauded - a la Fantasia and similar stories. They are labeled "strong women" because they made it as a single mom.

While this can be a good thing, I think it also put a little less emphasis on the possible consequences of having unprotected sex. It makes seem easier to think "well, if the worst that can happen is I get pregnant, I'll just have the baby - so many other teen girls before me have done it and survived, I know I can too."

But pregnancy is not the worst thing that can happen, as we all know.

I personally still feel that birth control (specifically the most reliable forms - such as pills, the ring, etc) are not as easily available to teens as they should be. It would also help if there were more non-prescription, reliable, and readily available forms of birth control for girls. Alot of these girls just don't want to drag their butts to a Planned Parenthood or tell their parents they want to go to the gyno to get on the pill and I'm not surprised by that - especially in situations where the parents are not as open about sex education as they could be. It not an excuse, but it's part of the reason.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

one of my friends (who is 25) just doesn't care. she told me that she had a preggo scare recently and when i asked if she was being careful she tells me no, that she does NOT want a baby. She grew up in a town where it was totally normal to be 17 with kids. Most of her friends were moms by then. I never understood how so many girls could be uneducated, nor can i understand why, if you DON'T want to get preggo, you'd be lazy w/ protection...

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

we were talking about teen pregnancy the other day in my HS psychology class and the students all thought that the idea that abstinence is the only way to teach students was completely ridiculous - they all want to know the ins and outs of everything and many are not willing to ask their parents -
that is probably why you saw so many teen girls who are soon to be moms

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I think this is a HUGE problem in our society and abstinence only sex ed is NOT the answer.

I went to NYC public schools for most of my education and we had VERY rare sex education before HS. I think in 5th grade we had some experimental curriculum and I remember seeing a puberty video...(ugh! ) and learning a lot about AIDS. We didn't learn about condoms, but we did learn that AIDS was transmitted through bodily fluids and sexual intercourse. At that age there was never any talk of getting STDs from something other than vaginal intercourse.

I was a smart kid, pretty educated, always curious, so I learned about things other kids may not have, but I have to tell you that as a young teen, I was doing things that weren't "Sexual intercourse" and never in a million years did I think I could get an STD from that. I can't believe I was so stupid, but I just didn't know. You have to remember I guess that adolescents brains are not fully formed. My parents did NOT sit me down and talk about sex with me until I was 16 or so and a family friend had an abortion. I told them "I learned it all at school (lie)" and they seemed relieved.

I know of several people who got pregnant the first time they had sex because they thought 1) you can't get pregnant the first time 2) you can't get pregnant when you have your period 3) you can't get pregnant if you haven't gotten your period, etc.

When I did have sex ed in 11th grade, it was pretty moot for a lot of people (though less so at my school..there was actually an article my senior year about how kids at my HS were not having sex ), but it was VERY informative. It pushed abstinence, but we still learned ALL of the facts about birth control. I think it needs to be done sooner.

I also think parents NEED to be involved. I think a lot of parents a) leave it up to the school, b) avoid it altogether or c) think saying "don't have sex" is a good plan. Let's face it, when you're a teenager there are more rumours than truths going around about sex, and if you're the girl who has been sheltered her whole life, and you never talk about "s - e -x" at home, then it's pretty easy for some guy to convince you of all kinds of lies.

Another problem is the guilt/shame complex. I think a lot of girls and women don't carry protection or seek it out because then it makes the sex look intentional on their part. They're still going to have the sex, but they can't be the ones who planned it.

I think the best prevention for teen pregnancy is parents who are open and honest with their children and who can give their children the facts BEFORE someone else gives them all of the rumors and lies about sex. They also need to be realisitic and know that many kids ARE going to have sex no matter how much you tell them not to, and the most loving, caring and protective thing you can do for your child is to give them the knowledge and the protection they need so that they don't get pregnant or STDs

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Parents really hold the responsibility in telling their children about sex & protection. They should not rely on teachers to do this. Especially since some school districts are against teaching sex ed and teach abstinence only education...which is ridiculous.

When I told my mom that I wanted to go on the pill...she said, "you know you still have to use condoms when you are on the pill." We never had a serious "sex" talk...but she did always make sure I knew what the consequences of my actions could be.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

It's sad

I think to myself-- don't these girls want to enjoy being girls? Being kids? Having no responsibilities?

But I guess by the time they realize that it's too late and they get pregnant.

I think we just need more education on the level of parents, schools and for everyone just to be more aware and careful-- not only about pregnancy but STD's too which are really serious.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I think the children of today are so desensitized to intercourse as well as other sexual activities that it has become just something to do instead of something to wait for. Kids know and do a lot more than we did at their ages and it is no big deal.

My generation was one of the first to be hit with the AIDS scare in the 80s. Sex ed was limited. Condoms were not given out in schools. AIDS education was hardly something to talk about.

With all of the FREE resources that people have to avoid getting pregnant and contracting disease, teens still do because they know SOMEONE will take care of them whether it be their parents or the government. Some have actually learned this from their parents - it was good enough for them so the cycle continues. You would be surprised how this is the mentality of so many young people today. My father had a retail store and his busiest day was Mother's Day. Why? Because everyone in the neighborhood where the store was who COULD be a mother was a mother - even as young as 14.

However, no child asks to be born and they should not suffer for the lack of education (or in some cases care) of their parents. They all deserve a chance at a decent life. If that means their parents have to get off their a$$es, go back to school and get a job well then I am all for it. What I resent are people who have children as a means of income - BIG problem. Children deserve better.

Message edited 4/27/2007 11:11:59 PM.

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

Re: Teen Moms (semi-vent)

I think the best prevention for teen pregnancy is parents who are open and honest with their children and who can give their children the facts BEFORE someone else gives them all of the rumors and lies about sex. They also need to be realisitic and know that many kids ARE going to have sex no matter how much you tell them not to, and the most loving, caring and protective thing you can do for your child is to give them the knowledge and the protection they need so that they don't get pregnant or STDs



AMEN!!!!
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Message edited 4/27/2007 9:36:21 PM.