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05mommy09
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Ergghhh-what do I do?
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Message edited 1/21/2008 7:33:27 AM.
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Posted 1/20/08 9:41 AM  |
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KristinasMama
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
I don't think that you should have to put them at your mom's house.
You aren't letting him play them before a respectable time in the morning, and you have the sticks hidden at such an early time in the evening. Prob a time when a lot of families are sitting down to dinner is when RJ is going to sleep!
I say stand your ground, and keep those drums in your apartment!
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| Posted 1/20/08 9:46 AM |
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nov04libride
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
I'm torn...It definitely seems like the hours in which he is playing are reasonable, but I too live in a complex and was so sick last weekend and a neighbor had the bass pounding all day long. That combined with my already bad headache and vomitting was just awful. Yes, it was the afternoon, but I was trying to sleep and had the flu. My upstairs neighbor works nights, so he asked us early on to be aware, and to please not play movies or music loud during the day. We complied, though we wouldn't have to based on the rules of our complex (which say to limit noise and appliances during 9AM and 9PM).
So to keep the peace with the neighbors, I would probably keep them at your mom's. It stinks, but I know first-hand that neighbor arguments and battles are not fun.
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| Posted 1/20/08 9:51 AM |
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05mommy09
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Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by nov04libride
I'm torn...It definitely seems like the hours in which he is playing are reasonable, but I too live in a complex and was so sick last weekend and a neighbor had the bass pounding all day long. That combined with my already bad headache and vomitting was just awful. Yes, it was the afternoon, but I was trying to sleep and had the flu. My upstairs neighbor works nights, so he asked us early on to be aware, and to please not play movies or music loud during the day. We complied, though we wouldn't have to based on the rules of our complex (which say to limit noise and appliances during 9AM and 9PM).
So to keep the peace with the neighbors, I would probably keep them at your mom's. It stinks, but I know first-hand that neighbor arguments and battles are not fun.
That was the one day that you were sick- and at that point- if someone came down and said- Im really sick do you think you can hide the sticks for today- I would totally understand...
But on days you are feeling well- do you think its fair to tell someone to stop playing the bass???
I also wanna add-
We are not home M-f between 6am and 4/4:30 pm and on the weekends we are out and about-
so if you put in the equation the small amount of time we are home + the hours that DS is "allowed" to play- his playing time prob equal 1-3 hrs for the entire week!!!!
Message edited 1/20/2008 10:01:58 AM.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:01 AM |
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Silly question - but would a white noise machine maybe mask the sound? I know psychologists use them so people can't hear thru the door... but maybe because talking is quieter than the machine - but it doesn't hurt to ask - go to Sam Ash and ask if they have anything that masks the drum noise somehow...
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:03 AM |
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LightUpOurLife
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Princessmaris
We are not home M-f between 6am and 4/4:30 pm and on the weekends we are out and about-
so if you put in the equation the small amount of time we are home + the hours that DS is "allowed" to play- his playing time prob equal 1-3 hrs for the entire week!!!!
I think this decides my vote. If you were home all day it would be different.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:07 AM |
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patti08
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Patti
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
You are being very considerate with the hours you allow him to play the drums. You have been tolerant of your neighbors' noise. I'd just make sure you aren't breaking any rules that your complex has and then let him bang away.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:12 AM |
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MelToddJulia
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
The neighbor complaining is the same guy who plays his music up till 10pm, knowing you have a baby downstairs?
If your not home that much and Ryan only plays on it for a few hours, then I really don't see the big deal, and if that neighbor complains tell him all about the noise he makes at 10pm and you never complain about it.
Its a tough situation though......
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:13 AM |
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cantbelieveit
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Tammy
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
I'd probably say keep them especially since at first it sounded like he was playing them from 10 am till 7-8 pm. But since no one is home most of the day and he doesn't play much, I don't see it as a problem. Or maybe even talk to your neighbors and see when they would think a fair time to play is out of the hours you are home. Good luck.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:16 AM |
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Salason
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
That's a tough one. I think I'd have to say put them at your mom's though. I live in an apartment too and although it totally stinks, there's some stuff that I know DS won't be able to have while living here. That said, I WOULD start complaining when that neighbor starts playing his radio loud at night.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:18 AM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by MelToddJulia
The neighbor complaining is the same guy who plays his music up till 10pm, knowing you have a baby downstairs?
If your not home that much and Ryan only plays on it for a few hours, then I really don't see the big deal, and if that neighbor complains tell him all about the noise he makes at 10pm and you never complain about it.
Its a tough situation though......
Ry walks by, bangs a few times then walks away- a little bit later bangs a little more and walks away..
I mean he's 2- its not like he is playing a song for any long period of time, and his attention span is quite short...
Yes- the same neighbor that is complaining pratices his Dj stuff above DS bedroom- sometimes @ 10 pm...
The have a son- who is 2 months younger than Ryan however he goes to bed very late and I guess sleeps in...
So to him- since his son goes to bed @ 11pm- him playing his DJ stuff @ 10 is no big deal...
We have never complained before- again- I accept it as part of the deal when you rent..
However- now the next time he decides to play DJ @ 9 pm Ill make sure to ring his bell and let him know we are asleep.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:19 AM |
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EmmaNick
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Not what you want to hear I'm sure, but I would send them to your mother's and also tell the guy you can hear his music so he needs to turn it down. I've been in this situation and it ultimately turned ugly with our next door neighboor.
I think everyone that lives in an apartment should be respectful of the tenants around them. Everyday household noise is acceptable, but loud music, etc. just isn't when it comes to apartment living.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:23 AM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Summerrluvv
Not what you want to hear I'm sure, but I would send them to your mother's and also tell the guy you can hear his music so he needs to turn it down. I've been in this situation and it ultimately turned ugly with our next door neighboor.
I think everyone that lives in an apartment should be respectful of the tenants around them. Everyday household noise is acceptable, but loud music, etc. just isn't when it comes to apartment living.
I agree-
but that means no one should play the radio or play an instrument when living in an apt.???
It just makes no sense...
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:24 AM |
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MelToddJulia
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Mel
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by MelToddJulia
The neighbor complaining is the same guy who plays his music up till 10pm, knowing you have a baby downstairs?
If your not home that much and Ryan only plays on it for a few hours, then I really don't see the big deal, and if that neighbor complains tell him all about the noise he makes at 10pm and you never complain about it.
Its a tough situation though......
Ry walks by, bangs a few times then walks away- a little bit later bangs a little more and walks away..
I mean he's 2- its not like he is playing a song for any long period of time, and his attention span is quite short...
Yes- the same neighbor that is complaining pratices his Dj stuff above DS bedroom- sometimes @ 10 pm...
The have a son- who is 2 months younger than Ryan however he goes to bed very late and I guess sleeps in...
So to him- since his son goes to bed @ 11pm- him playing his DJ stuff @ 10 is no big deal...
We have never complained before- again- I accept it as part of the deal when you rent..
However- now the next time he decides to play DJ @ 9 pm Ill make sure to ring his bell and let him know we are asleep.
I really can't believe they have the nerve to complain when they are doing the same thing themselves, even worse on there part since they are playing up till 10pm and this is an adult, you would think he would be a little more respectful to his neighbors downstairs. I would keep Ryan's drum set in your house and like you said he's 2, I really don't think he's playing for hours at a time--lol If the people upstairs complain again, bring up all there annoying crap to them!!
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:29 AM |
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EmmaNick
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by Summerrluvv
Not what you want to hear I'm sure, but I would send them to your mother's and also tell the guy you can hear his music so he needs to turn it down. I've been in this situation and it ultimately turned ugly with our next door neighboor.
I think everyone that lives in an apartment should be respectful of the tenants around them. Everyday household noise is acceptable, but loud music, etc. just isn't when it comes to apartment living.
I agree-
but that means no one should play the radio or play an instrument when living in an apt.???
It just makes no sense...
Honestly, when you sign up for apartment living, you sign up to be respectful of the neighboring tenants. Obviously your neighbor isn't very respectful and really has no right to complain though. But if he complains to management, you are the one that is going to get something in your file KWIM?
With that said, in the six years I rented my townhouse I was never a complainer until I got a new neighbor. I complained both to him and to management about his loud bass blaring all night and even had to resort to filing a noise complaint with the police dept. Shortly thereafter *I* got an eviction notice for "harassing" the neighbor.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:36 AM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
Name:
<3 Mommy <3
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by Summerrluvv
Not what you want to hear I'm sure, but I would send them to your mother's and also tell the guy you can hear his music so he needs to turn it down. I've been in this situation and it ultimately turned ugly with our next door neighbor.
I think everyone that lives in an apartment should be respectful of the tenants around them. Everyday household noise is acceptable, but loud music, etc. just isn't when it comes to apartment living.
I agree-
but that means no one should play the radio or play an instrument when living in an apt.???
It just makes no sense...
Honestly, when you sign up for apartment living, you sign up to be respectful of the neighboring tenants. Obviously your neighbor isn't very respectful and really has no right to complain though. But if he complains to management, you are the one that is going to get something in your file KWIM?
With that said, in the six years I rented my townhouse I was never a complainer until I got a new neighbor. I complained both to him and to management about his loud bass blaring all night and even had to resort to filing a noise complaint with the police dept. Shortly thereafter *I* got an eviction notice for "harassing" the neighbor.
Even if I am compiling with the "rules"- DS is not allowed to play them during "quite hours"
I could understand if this was a private residence- but this is a complex-
No one has more rights than anyone else- and as long as we all follow the "rules" who can say what is "right" or "wrong"-
At 10am I gave DS his sticks...
Do you know what he did- he banged for less than a min. and hasn't gone back yet-
Did you see what I added- since his attention span is so short if you added up the total hr for the entire week- he prob only plays 1-3hrs TOTAL- and that is an exaggerated estimate...
Message edited 1/20/2008 10:43:00 AM.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:42 AM |
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EmmaNick
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Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by Summerrluvv
Not what you want to hear I'm sure, but I would send them to your mother's and also tell the guy you can hear his music so he needs to turn it down. I've been in this situation and it ultimately turned ugly with our next door neighbor.
I think everyone that lives in an apartment should be respectful of the tenants around them. Everyday household noise is acceptable, but loud music, etc. just isn't when it comes to apartment living.
I agree-
but that means no one should play the radio or play an instrument when living in an apt.???
It just makes no sense...
Honestly, when you sign up for apartment living, you sign up to be respectful of the neighboring tenants. Obviously your neighbor isn't very respectful and really has no right to complain though. But if he complains to management, you are the one that is going to get something in your file KWIM?
With that said, in the six years I rented my townhouse I was never a complainer until I got a new neighbor. I complained both to him and to management about his loud bass blaring all night and even had to resort to filing a noise complaint with the police dept. Shortly thereafter *I* got an eviction notice for "harassing" the neighbor.
Even if I am compiling with the "rules"- DS is not allowed to play them during "quite hours"
I could understand if this was a private residence- but this is a complex-
No one has more rights than anyone else- and as long as we all follow the "rules" who can say what is "right" or "wrong"-
At 10am I gave DS his sticks...
Do you know what he did- he banged for less than a min. and hasn't gone back yet-
Did you see what I added- since his attention span is so short if you added up the total hr for the entire week- he prob only plays 1-3hrs TOTAL- and that is an exaggerated estimate...
I rented in a complex also, and IMO the "rules" are much more stringent than in a private residence. Like I said, your neighbor is wrong for complaining when he is louder than RJ is playing his drums. I just don't want to see him complaining to management about YOU when he is doing the same thing. Then of course you can complain back, but then it just starts a whole war which ultimately ends badly.
It's a tough situation, and with the exception of this place, I've only lived in complexes and have learned that everyone should be respectful of everyone when it comes to noise. That's not always the case, but it comes with the territory.
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:48 AM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
Name:
<3 Mommy <3
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by Princessmaris
Posted by Summerrluvv
Not what you want to hear I'm sure, but I would send them to your mother's and also tell the guy you can hear his music so he needs to turn it down. I've been in this situation and it ultimately turned ugly with our next door neighbor.
I think everyone that lives in an apartment should be respectful of the tenants around them. Everyday household noise is acceptable, but loud music, etc. just isn't when it comes to apartment living.
I agree-
but that means no one should play the radio or play an instrument when living in an apt.???
It just makes no sense...
Honestly, when you sign up for apartment living, you sign up to be respectful of the neighboring tenants. Obviously your neighbor isn't very respectful and really has no right to complain though. But if he complains to management, you are the one that is going to get something in your file KWIM?
With that said, in the six years I rented my townhouse I was never a complainer until I got a new neighbor. I complained both to him and to management about his loud bass blaring all night and even had to resort to filing a noise complaint with the police dept. Shortly thereafter *I* got an eviction notice for "harassing" the neighbor.
Even if I am compiling with the "rules"- DS is not allowed to play them during "quite hours"
I could understand if this was a private residence- but this is a complex-
No one has more rights than anyone else- and as long as we all follow the "rules" who can say what is "right" or "wrong"-
At 10am I gave DS his sticks...
Do you know what he did- he banged for less than a min. and hasn't gone back yet-
Did you see what I added- since his attention span is so short if you added up the total hr for the entire week- he prob only plays 1-3hrs TOTAL- and that is an exaggerated estimate...
I rented in a complex also, and IMO the "rules" are much more stringent than in a private residence. Like I said, your neighbor is wrong for complaining when he is louder than RJ is playing his drums. I just don't want to see him complaining to management about YOU when he is doing the same thing. Then of course you can complain back, but then it just starts a whole war which ultimately ends badly.
It's a tough situation, and with the exception of this place, I've only lived in complexes and have learned that everyone should be respectful of everyone when it comes to noise. That's not always the case, but it comes with the territory.
I agree- everyone has to be respectful- and thats why I limit DS "playing" time-
IMO- part of being respectful is you give a little and you take a little...
There are things that all of my neighbors do that p!ss me off- but again- I take a little because to me thats being respectful..
For ex: I never complained about the music @ 10 pm (despite the fact we were all in bed) because I know he works 2 jobs and has limited practice time-
Part of respect is compromise- and I feel i give that to everyone...
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:52 AM |
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EmmaNick
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Part of respect is compromise- and I feel i give that to everyone...
I know you do, but what else can I say other than people just plain s*ck ya know? 
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| Posted 1/20/08 10:54 AM |
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Karen
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Karen
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
that's a tough situation all around. are you friendly with the neighbor? I would maybe go up there and try to come to some sort of compromise about the timing.
and I hate to say it - but the fact that he is guilty also is almost irrelevant at this point. if it never bothered you enough before to complain, to do so now is just going to seem retailiatory and petty. know what I mean? it $ucks that you were being the bigger person and now you're getting grief for it.
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| Posted 1/20/08 11:21 AM |
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Stefanie
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
I would not take the drums to your mom's house. RJ is not playing in a band, he tapping on drums. I think you're being respectful with the time that you give him the sticks and take them away.
This coming from someone who is blasting music at 10pm?
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| Posted 1/20/08 11:34 AM |
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june262004
But I love the Snow!
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Kristin
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
IMO it might be annoying to others but o well.
My house is close to the neighbors I can hear them playing music outside. IF they have friends over in the backyard I hear it. When they use power tools (my one neighbor was still using them outside until 2:16 am a couple of weeks ago) I hear it.
as long as it's not being done at crazy hours, I don't see a problem with it.
I lived with one of my cousins in an apt (she lived downstairs I lived upstairs) she got mad when we vaccumed at 7:45 pm. I called her nuts 
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| Posted 1/20/08 11:46 AM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
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LB
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
i live in an apartment as well and i would side with the other residents here - even though you go into it knowing it's an "apartment setting" i try and be as conscientious as possible so i don't disturb my neighbors more than is necessary.
although i understand why you would want RJ to enjoy his drums as much as possible i also think it's important to teach him to respect others... and for me that would mean explaining to him that because you live in an apartment the drums have to go to grandma's where they will not disturb the neighbors.
ETA: i say this not knowing, obviously, how loud the drums are when he plays - but i have friends who play drums and i know that the noise, even for an hour or two, can be really aggravating.
Message edited 1/20/2008 12:17:11 PM.
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| Posted 1/20/08 12:15 PM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
Name:
<3 Mommy <3
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Posted by headoverheels
although i understand why you would want RJ to enjoy his drums as much as possible i also think it's important to teach him to respect others... and for me that would mean explaining to him that because you live in an apartment the drums have to go to grandma's where they will not disturb the neighbors.
IMO- I am teaching him to be respectful of others- when I explain why we are only allowed to have the drum sticks at certain times of the day
ETA:
Posted by headoverheels
ETA: i say this not knowing, obviously, how loud the drums are when he plays - but i have friends who play drums and i know that the noise, even for an hour or two, can be really aggravating.
Did you read the whole thread??? The child is maybe playing for an hour or 2 over the course of an entire week!
Message edited 1/20/2008 12:19:16 PM.
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| Posted 1/20/08 12:18 PM |
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KateDevine
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Re: Ergghhh-what do I do?
Marissa can they really hear him? Or did they see the drum set coming in and want to complain about something before you guys complain about them? How loud can RJ be playing them?
I agree with Summer too though because I've been bitten in the azz by renting situations where we have been in the right, but it doesn't seem to matter.
Maybe don't give him the sticks until 11am on the weekends and let them know that you would appreicate that since RJ won't be playing early that you expect the same respect as well?
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| Posted 1/20/08 12:24 PM |
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