LIFamilies.com - Long Island, NY


RSS
Articles Business Directory Blog Real Estate Community Forum Shop My Family Contests

Log In Chat Index Search Rules Lingo Create Account

Quick navigation:   

Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted By Message
Pages: 1 2 [3]

dm24angel
Happiness

Member since 5/05

34581 total posts

Name:
Donna

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

I would love to be a SAHM, wont be though, but may work P/T instead...we think we may be able to afford that.

I got in a fight once though with my sister who is a SAHM with two boys ( one in school) because I never saw her and every time I would talk about work, she would try to top me with tales of laundry and cleaning. My point was that I have to work 10 hours a day, then come home to do the laundry and cleaning...and I dont get 5 minute couch breaks....she would usually tell me all about the talk shows on during the day.

I felt VERY insulted that she would feel her job of being a SAHM was harder then me working( with no kids though) ....

Not to say I dont think SAHM's work hard, BIELIEVE ME..I KNOW how hard they work and I dont think for a second its an easy job, or not actually completly exhausting at times....

Posted 7/27/05 8:43 PM
 
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource

hazeleyes33
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

13060 total posts

Name:
Ginger

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted by dm24angel

I would love to be a SAHM, wont be though, but may work P/T instead...we think we may be able to afford that.

I got in a fight once though with my sister who is a SAHM with two boys ( one in school) because I never saw her and every time I would talk about work, she would try to top me with tales of laundry and cleaning. My point was that I have to work 10 hours a day, then come home to do the laundry and cleaning...and I dont get 5 minute couch breaks....she would usually tell me all about the talk shows on during the day.

I felt VERY insulted that she would feel her job of being a SAHM was harder then me working( with no kids though) ....

Not to say I dont think SAHM's work hard, BIELIEVE ME..I KNOW how hard they work and I dont think for a second its an easy job, or not actually completly exhausting at times....




I agree with your last quote, while it is hard to stay at home and take care of children, not EVERYDAY is hard. I totally understand if you have tons of kids-lol! or 2 or more that are VERY young BUT, I just don't understand women who have school-aged children who complain it is hard and then don't have an emmaculate house or dinner on the table for their family. What do they do ALL day?? You have over 6 hours a day to YOURSELF!!
I have the same responsibilities of home as a SAHM but have to do everything either at night (when I am exhausted from working all day and the pressure of my boss) or on the weekend when I want to spend that time with my family.

Posted 7/27/05 8:56 PM
 

justme1
Proud SAHM

Member since 5/05

1955 total posts

Name:
Jodi

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Well I can tell you how my day goes.
Im up at 7am to get my 9 year old ready for school.
Give him breakfast, watch him get on bus.
Shower, dress
Baby up.. bottle and feeding time..Clean up..
Then he plays and I start my chores..there is piles of laundry,maybe I clean a bathroom or the kitchen.. maybe vacume... play with baby a little ( yes this would be when I can catch a 5 minute couch break but the baby is sitting on my head LOL)
Laundrys done, start another load..
Do either food shopping or run any other errands outside the house I might have.

Rush home cause its lunch time for baby.
WHen baby naps, I get to grab a bite and continue household chores. Maybe do some banking, return any important phone calls.

Older son comes home.. its snack time.
I start dinner while trying to clean up house that baby destroyed...
HOMEWORK TIME.... I help my son with his work..
Give him dinner..
Feed baby again..
Try to do dishes and clean up kitchen..
My 9 year old wants to play.. I cant say no all the time right?
DH comes home, feed him dinner..
SHOWER and BATH time...
Get older son ready for bed..
Baby needs bath...Lots to clean up after this.
Give baby bottle and put to bed
I finally get to eat my dinner at 9pm
Read Book with 9 year old..
He goes to bed..
Its 10pm and Im exhausted but now I still find myself needing to still clean up cause house seems trashed again...

This is everyday, all day long. No breaks, no days off..
Sometimes Im needed in the middle of the night.. maybe a bad dream, a cough..

Im sure Im leaving a million things out.

This is a general description, it doesnt include all the nights I have to balance this and also go to baseball or hockey or other playdates.. or the days I have doctors or other appoitments.

I can promise you..although I wouldnt trade this for anything in the whole world.. it leaves me completely exhausted.
lol

Message edited 7/27/2005 10:50:03 PM.

Posted 7/27/05 9:19 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Wow. What an increidbly full day!

Posted 7/27/05 9:34 PM
 

nov04libride
big brother <3

Member since 5/05

14672 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Wow, that does sound busy. I can't imagine doing all the laundry/cleaning/cooking/doctor appts while working full time. Chat Icon It's such a full day without having another job from 9-5. I know some nights and weekends now it seems like all I do is clean/laundry/food shop, and we don't even have a baby to take care of (though I do go to school full time and work full time).

Posted 7/27/05 10:09 PM
 

MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.

Member since 5/05

26170 total posts

Name:
MrsERod™®

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted by IslandGrl

Well I can tell you how my day goes.
Im up at 7am to get my 9 year old ready for school.
Give him breakfast, watch him get on bus.
Shower, dress
Baby up.. bottle and feeding time..Clean up..
Then he plays and I start my chores..there is piles of laundry,maybe I clean a bathroom or the kitchen.. maybe vacume... play with baby a little ( yes this would be when I can catch a 5 minute couch break but the baby is sitting on my head)
Laundrys done, start another load..
Do either food shopping or run any other errands outside the house I might have.
Rush home cause its lunch time for baby.
WHen baby naps, I get to grab a bite and continue household chores.
Older son comes home.. its snack time.
I start dinner while trying to clean up house that baby destroyed...
HOMEWORK TIME.... I help my son with his work..
Give him dinner..
Feed baby again..
Try to do dishes and clean up kitchen..
My 9 year old wants to play.. I cant say no all the time right?
DH comes home, feed him dinner..
SHOWER and BATH time...
Get older son ready for bed..
Baby needs bath...Lots to clean up after this.
Give baby bottle and put to bed
I finally get to eat my dinner at 9pm
Read Book with 9 year old..
He goes to bed..
Its 10pm and Im exhausted but now I still find myself needing to still clean up cause house seems trashed again..

Im sure Im leaving a million things out.

This is a general description, it doesnt include all the nights I have to balance this and also go to baseball or hockey or other playdates.. or the days I have doctors or other appoitments.

I can promise you..although I wouldnt trade this for anything in the whole world.. it leaves me completely exhausted.
lol



wow...we lead very similar lives..lol - except in my case i have a 12 year old daughter (who is basically self sufficient) but DOES add to the mess sometimes!! and is also a GREAT help..Chat Icon AND a 2 year old daughter as well (enough said LOL)

also, i just started working (sometimes from home) and its very difficult to juggle all of the above, AND have clients calling you at the same time!!! Chat Icon
by 10:00 i'm EXHAUSTED!!! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Message edited 7/27/2005 10:22:08 PM.

Posted 7/27/05 10:21 PM
 

jillybean66
LIF Toddler

Member since 5/05

393 total posts

Name:

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

My DH stays home with our baby - I made more $ and had better benefits, etc., so it had to be that way. THis is fine with me since I do not want to be a SAHM. I know what hard work it is to stay home and take care of kids...but DH is having no problem with it. We do not do loads of laundry each day - I don't know how it is possible to generate that much laundry!!! We do laundry once per week, food shop once per week (together on the weekend usually). DH cleans up the house daily, but it does not take him that long....most of his time is spent playing with the baby (and trust me he gets in some good tv time!). He can get things done when the baby naps. My friends and relatives who stay home with their kids always seem to be complaining about all of the work it is, etc. I don't know why, but to DH and I, it is not bad at all....Although I am sure it gets much harder when you add a second child to the mix!

Posted 7/28/05 11:20 AM
 

justme1
Proud SAHM

Member since 5/05

1955 total posts

Name:
Jodi

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Yea, with my first son It wasnt as stressful.

For some reason the work load seems to tripple with every additional child.

I remember doing 1 wash a week when I was single and living alone, but with 4 ppls towels and clothes I have a full hamper everyday.
Now even more so cause of bathing suits, pool towels and dirty baseball clothes after practice.
lol

Posted 7/28/05 11:40 AM
 

FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic

Member since 6/05

10212 total posts

Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

My sister just became a SAHM and she hates it! She used to work for my dad (family business that just went under) and never even took maternity leave. In fact, she was working from home the day after she gave birth both times! She also had the luxury to bring both kids to work with her when they were babies (she had a nanny to keep an eye on them while she did work).
She is so bored now. She is thinking about putting the 2 1/2 old in part time day care just so she can get a part time job or something. My BIL makes enough that she can stay home for now, but not for day care as well. She loves spending all day with the little one (the older one is at day camp), but she is really bored. They spend most of their day at the pool or going shopping and stuff but she feels that she is missing out on "adult time".
Me, on the other hand, hope to one day be a SAHM! DH and I talk about it all the time. We will wait to see what happens, but as much as I love my nephews, I imagine I will love my own child even more. I can't imagine leaving him or her while I go off to work. I am so exhausted half the time now, I can only imagine what I will be like with a child.

Posted 7/28/05 12:13 PM
 

paulandles912
My children are a blessing!

Member since 5/05

2598 total posts

Name:
Leslie

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

If my DH had medical benefits, I probably would have been a SAHM, at least while Andrew is so little. But DH's work is 100% commission, no benefits. He is a SAHD and does his real estate deals when he can. So far its been working out OK.

Posted 7/29/05 1:19 PM
 

Woodsy
LIF Infant

Member since 6/05

241 total posts

Name:

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted by Bxgell2

Posted by Ali

I always thought I would stay at home, but now that I'm pregnant I just don't think it's going to be possible, financially. Also I'm starting to really like my job and wondering about what options I'll have in the future. I'm an attorney and someday I'd love to go to the US Attorney's Office. If I leave work now, though, I'll never have that opportunity. It's so confusing. Last week my dh and I just started talking about hiring a nanny.



We're in the same boat! I'm an attorney as well, and my long term goal is to work for the US attorney's office or the Dept. of Justice - I plan on working after my maternity leave for that very reason. Hopefully, down the line, working for the government will provide better benefits, vacation and less hours, so hopefully it will all be worth it! Chat Icon



I am an attorney also. I used to intern at the U.S. Attorney's office and have friends who work there now. It's a great place to work but I don't think they work less hours. The AUSA's work hours like big firm lawyers. For me to work at the US attorney's office, I'd have to take about an $80G+ paycut. Since I can make more $$ working 3 days at a firm as opposed to 5 days at a gov't job, I'm sort of stuck doing the big firm thing. I just hope the P/T lawyer thing works out...

That being said, I'd love to ditch the law completely and be a SAHM when my baby comes in December, but at this point it's not economically feasible.

Posted 8/2/05 6:08 PM
 

Shelly
She's 7!!!

Member since 8/05

14624 total posts

Name:

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

I would love to be a SAHM, but that is just not an option. Neither is working part time. But I have a great job, with great hours and a great salary and a boss who is only in the office once a week. If I took time off and went back to look, I would never find a job as good as this one. I will just have to find a way to manage both.

ETA: I'm also an attorney. I do corporate work- and work 9-5. How could i give this up? It will be better in the long run for raising a family.

Message edited 8/12/2005 10:38:20 AM.

Posted 8/10/05 3:42 PM
 

Kelly
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

681 total posts

Name:
This is it

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted by ChristineR

My husband says he would work 3 jobs so that I could be a SAHM, he knows how important is is to me. Most of my friends who have children are SAHM. Chat Icon Chat Icon



That's very sweet.

My favorite is people who say: "oh, you'll get bored" to those who say that they want to stay home with their kids.

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/12/05 10:23 AM
 

Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted by Kelly

My favorite is people who say: "oh, you'll get bored" to those who say that they want to stay home with their kids.

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon


why?
maybe "bored" isn't the right word....but i think at some point i would need more....And couldn't be happy with my life being just a SAHM.

Posted 8/12/05 10:25 AM
 

FeliciaDP

Member since 5/05

18599 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

Posted by Shellyesq

I would love to be a SAHM, but that is just not an option. Neither is working part time. But I have a great job, with great hours and a great salary and a boss who is only in the office once a week. If I took time off and went back to look, I would never find a job as good as this one. I will just have to find a way to manage both.



I could have written this post

Ideally I would love to be a SAHM for the first year, then go back to work PT .. but realisitcally its not in the cards for us, and I am OK with that

I do have a FABULOUS boss who I wouldn't trade for anything, a job with a good amount of flexibility, a decent work environment and good time off/benefits. The ONLY thing that is a slight drawback is the commute to/from NYC but I am going to work to change my hours after coming back from maternity leave.

Posted 8/12/05 10:31 AM
 

casey31
Mommy of 3!

Member since 5/05

2967 total posts

Name:
Mommy to two boys and a girl

Re: Working Mom vs Stay at Home mom

I would love to be a SAHM when the time comes but I don't think we'll be able to do that. What I'm hoping is maybe being able to work from home 1 day a week. then, grandma care 1 day a week and then day care three days a week. I feel like I can barely manage working and cleaning now- I can't imagine adding a baby to the mix but I guess the housework will just have to slide a little!! Chat Icon

Posted 8/12/05 11:08 AM
 
Pages: 1 2 [3]
 

Potentially Related Topics:

Topic Posted By Started Replies Forum
For Stay at Home Mom Q Ali1 1/20/06 9 Parenting
New Mom willing to Work at Home djd711 7/27/06 3 Career
Tip for the Mom's: Don't try this at home! Ambersmom 4/17/06 2 Parenting
Mom is coming home today! Marcie 3/1/06 32 Families Helping Families ™
my mom is home from the hospital! pschica 7/9/05 5 Families Helping Families ™
i hate being a working mom Jenn27 9/6/05 20 Parenting
 
Quick navigation:   
Currently 499843 users on the LIFamilies.com Chat
New Businesses
1 More Rep
Carleton Hall of East Islip
J&A Building Services
LaraMae Health Coaching
Sonic Wellness
Julbaby Photography LLC
Ideal Uniforms
Teresa Geraghty Photography
Camelot Dream Homes
Long Island Wedding Boutique
MB Febus- Rodan & Fields
Camp Harbor
Market America-Shop.com
ACM Basement Waterproofing
Travel Tom

      Follow LIWeddings on Facebook

      Follow LIFamilies on Twitter
Long Island Bridal Shows