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baghag
:P
Member since 5/05 10278 total posts
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
Posted by dpli
I think the difference is that when you lose trust in a friend or family member, it is easier to keep them in your life more as an aquaintance. You see them occasionally, maybe socialize with them, but the closeness may not be there anymore and it might be acceptable. I am not sure how I could continue to keep a spouse in my life at that level.
Thats what I was thinking, but couldn't say it as well as she did! 
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Posted 2/16/06 10:32 AM  |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
Posted by Janice
I totally understand what you are saying Sandra. That is exactly how I feel. I don't think there are any "dealbreakers" in my marriage. I would fight a good fight before I ever left.
Exactly.
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| Posted 2/16/06 10:37 AM |
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LAMGAJ28
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Member since 10/05 6039 total posts
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
Posted by Janice
That is exactly how I feel. I don't think there are any "dealbreakers" in my marriage. I would fight a good fight before I ever left.
Posted by Janice
I totally understand what you are saying Sandra. That is exactly how I feel. I don't think there are any "dealbreakers" in my marriage. I would fight a good fight before I ever left.
I'm certain everyone for the most part will give their marriage a good fight probably with the exception of those Hollywood celebrities. In my opinion, there should not be any "dealbreakers" in any marriage. Unfortunately when couples lose respect for each other...when there is cheating....someone is not taking their vows very seriously in the first place.
I'm not even mentioning any type of abuse because that's something that should not be tolerated at all.
As far as trusting, I think it's just a personal matter who can deal with that and try to trust again and those who know that once that level of trust is betrayed is impossible to get it back.
I also believe that marriage and friendship relationships are very different and are on a different level and DPLI put it in a great way.
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| Posted 2/16/06 11:11 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
I realize that my responses have been pretty harsh. It may be from where I'm coming from personally. While I haven't been in the situation where DH broke a trust, we have issues (not trust) that I'm not sure we can work through since he refuses to go to counseling.
I'm a lot less tolerant than most people. I've seen too many women become doormats to the men in their lives. My expression is more "Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on me" - except that I give the first time a pass. After the second try, I'd be done. I think that when you accept things like broken trust - how many times do you have to burned before you say to someone "you're not the guy I thought I married."?
For me things would be magnified a thousand times when there are children involved. I feel like we owe it to our kids to create health patterns for them to follow. I don't want my daughter (or son) accepting someone walking all over them.
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| Posted 2/16/06 11:16 AM |
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JennChris
life moves fast
Member since 5/05 4225 total posts
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Jenn
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
For me things would be magnified a thousand times when there are children involved. I feel like we owe it to our kids to create health patterns for them to follow. I don't want my daughter (or son) accepting someone walking all over them.
most definitely!!!
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| Posted 2/16/06 11:18 AM |
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btrflygrl
me and baby #3!
Member since 5/05 12013 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
Depending on the situation, yes trust can be repaired. I know from experience....DH and I went through a patch when we were dating where I broke his trust and I thought it was over, but he was just taking time to think. Turned out that the long road back led to good things
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| Posted 2/16/06 2:14 PM |
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn
Member since 5/05 31871 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
Posted by BabyAvocado
I keep reading threads where people are like "trust is gone so the marriage is over". Or he lied over something small and now the d-word is being thrown around, etc. Now yes, trust is definitely a huge foundation of a marriage but it just seems to me like many people are ready and so quick to walk out the door at the first sign of a lie. Don't people take their marriage vows seriously when it comes to this or is it that they just don't believe that broken trust can ever be repaired? Yes it takes work, ALOT of work AND time. But let me tell you from experience, it CAN be done. It just seems to me like so many people wouldn't even TRY, and IMO you owe to your marriage vows to at least try.
i was thinking this the other day....
how quickly people jump on the
you lie...no trust...the end...
For me it would be more about what KIND of lie was said or how the trust was broken
Some things, MAJOR things i would not be able to get over
Others i can get over....
ETA...BUT there are DEFINITE DEAL BREAKERS in my marriage
Message edited 2/16/2006 6:54:13 PM.
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| Posted 2/16/06 6:53 PM |
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MommyofG
just the girls
Member since 5/05 9461 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
It depends on what the "trust" or "lie" is about. I would try to work things out, but I have to be honest depending on what it is, I may not be able to b/c of how strongly I am against people who break my trust. Im the type of person where I would wonder, always analyze, so I dont know if I would be able to trust again. But I am certainly willing to try.
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| Posted 2/16/06 8:38 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: Does ANYONE believe that broken trust can be repaired?
Yes borken trust CAN be repaired...but they thing is its more on the part of the person who was HURT. When I hear people talk about things like Lie detectors etc, well that person is NEVER gonna trust their husband again if talking is not enough, actions are not enough, so in those situations, Its over IMO. Then when you see jealously arise or complete mistrust, well that person who did wrong, will never regain it...So I think thats the issue really based on what you have read.
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| Posted 2/16/06 8:49 PM |
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