Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it is greedy. It costs money to throw parties so its not like people are just giving you money.

If they dont want to go they don't have to!!!!

We had a great time at ours. I know our guests did too!

Celebrate its a joyous occasion!!!

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

very interesting

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Message edited 3/24/2012 6:29:52 PM.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Honestly, I don't like engagement parties.

If you have a backyard affair to have the families meet its one thing - but ive been to engagement parties that have DJ's, favors, a "first dance" mother/son dances, etc...its basically like a Mini wedding and I dont see the point!

But, in the end, I would do what you want. If you want to have an engagement party so the families can meet, i think its a great idea - just dont go too crazy, thats what the wedding is for!

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

my mom did not want me to have one for fear it looked like we were asking for gifts.

However, many people sent me an engagement gift anyway.

I am really opinionless about it. And since im the type of person that "sends a gift anyway" it would be nice to get some food out of it! LOL so I dont have any issues with these parties, but the older folk seem to..and since I care what people think, I did not have one.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Im going to be honest. I agree with Jax. I don't think they are greedy but if you have a shower I think that is enough.
I am not against them. If your having an e-party I think having it maybe a year to maybe 8 months before the wedding is fine. Some families (like mine) have showers 3 months before.
Ive been to backyard engagement parties, then parties that could have been the couples wedding.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Absolutely not greedy, and really just because you have an eparty doesnt mean everyone will bring gifts. My DH and I are older and our parents wanted to throw us one so we at first thought it would look that way , especialy since we had a lot of "Things" to begin with but you know in the end it was so nice. Not everyone bought gifts and quite frankly we did not care in the least. It was an amazing party and full of family and close firends that were jsut their to show how happy they were we found each other. HOnestly, that day was more important to me than my shower. I say go for it and enjoy every minute!!

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

We don't normally throw engagement parties in my family....but we used that time as an opportunity to throw a party to introduce the two families to one another.
It was called an "engagement party" but it was just a small party in my paren' 's backyard. We invited my husband's family, my family and members of the wedding party.
It was a lot of fun and not very much pressure for anyone.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I was a little different in that we didn't live close to each other so it was an opportunity for extended family to meet each other. Now looking back, I am glad I did it because my family now knows it isn't INSANE to come visit me here in my new hometown.

I do not think it's greedy at all especially if it is far away from the wedding. I prefer if it's within a few months (but hey, who am i to judge?!) and often times it has been casual.

If you want one, you should have one and not worry what others think!

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I think it partially depends on your social circle and partially on timing.

It's common or expected with some people and a gift grab to others.

For me, as long as the events are spaced properly, I think it's fine. I have mentioned before about one of my friends that had an e-party, shower, b-party and wedding within 7 months when her engagement was only 15 months long. E-parties should be closer to the date of engagement then the wedding.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

We had one mainly because:

1.) I didn't want a shower and my family wanted to do something. We didn't expect gifts, we just wanted to celebrate with people.

2.) It was a backyard party that was an opportunity for both families to meet before the wedding.

I think they can be nice, but I think they are more appropriate for a smaller group of people, like family and very close friends. I don't really think the guest list should include everyone that is invited to the wedding.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

For a long engagement where both families haven't met or you live faraway and some members haven't met the bride or groom to be... yes I see no problem

For anything less then say 15 months and there are also showers then I think it is a bit greedy if it is a big party or within a year of the wedding.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

greedy? no, I don't think so.. we had one, it was a year before the wedding. If it was like 2-3 months before the wedding, I would say that would probably annoy people.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Posted by npbride

I don't think they are greedy, maybe a little overkill if the shower and wedding are not too far off.

My BIL had an e-party, then less than a year later the bridal shower, then 6 weeks later the wedding. I thought that was a bit much.

Oh, did I mention that they put registry cards in the e-party invites?

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

We had one------- 2 years before our wedding.

We were freshly engaged, and wanted our whole families to meet. (We had been together for more than 5 years at that point, but Aunts/Uncles/etc. had never met.)

When we announced our engagement, MY PARENTS actually asked when they could throw us a party. It was a backyard party with homemade food, and it was fabulous. The party was hardly a wedding fundraiser, and I'm slightly offended when some suggest it was.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy. We were really on the fence about having one. Ultimately, we had a casual engagement party in our backyard with family and friends. Some brought gifts while others didn't. We didn't do it for the gifts. We did it because we wanted to celebrate our love and happiness.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy.

My FIL kept asking me if we were having one, but we had a fairly short engagement and didn't think it would be appropriate (for us).

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy. We had a meeting of the immediate families - which was about 70 people in itself.

This is what I think is weird - we just recently went to an engagement party where the couple invited EVERYONE they knew....even people who are NOT going to be invited to the wedding. THAT to me is very odd.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy, but I do kind of think it's weird when people register for an e-party. I think an e-party should be a celebration of your engagement- there will be plenty of other opportunities for people to buy you gifts- ie:your shower, the holidays, birthdays, etc...

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I don't think it's greedy. I wish I could ahve had one, not for the gifts...(the people who were going to get us e-gifts got the for us anyway), but because it's such a special occasion and should be celebrated. I really wish I could ahve ahd one, since we started with a 3 year engagement and now it's going to be 4 or 5, I would have loved to have some kind of party. They're fun! I had a graduation party and I absolutely LOVED it. I invited a lot of friends who were my age or younger so I didn't "make back" the oney we'd spent, but it was the best day of my life, I had a blast. And if you're family and friends care about you they will be honored to celebrate with you.

And if they don't feel like giving a gift, they don't have to come. I dont really think of an e=party as the kind of occasion where you send a gift even if you don't go..but I could be wrong.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I do not think it is greedy. When we got engaged we kept a party for both sides of the family to officially meet each other. However, we made sure to let everyone knows no gifts please. The party was more of introductory party.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

My mom agrees with Jax' mom. She hates them and has always told me that e-parties are just an excuse to get gifts. I don't know if I necessarily feel the same way - if I'm invited to one it's very likely that I'll attend. But I know at the time of my wedding my girlfriend kept encouraging me to have one because "it's a great way to make some money for the wedding" so I guess I'm on the fence.

Re: Since many of you already went through the wedding process,is having an engagemnt party greedy?

I didnt have one but I dont think that its greedy at all!!