Do You Have Single Friends

That constantly say that they are so happy with their lives and they cannot imagine getting married so young or they could have been married but choose not to? I have two friends who constantly say this and it is annoying the crap out of me. Do you think it is jealousy? How would you respond to them?

Message edited 8/10/2006 3:33:30 PM.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

nope

I don't have even 1 single friend, DH does though and he gets tthe opposite from them. they would LOVE to settle down.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Yes, I have single friends, but they never talk like that probably bc they are in their early 30's though.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Nope. All my single friends want to be married or at least settled down. All they do is complain about single/unmarried life

I think they have great lives and don't get why they are complaining

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Hmmm...All of my close friends are married. The few that I see on occassion are mostly long term dating and are dying to get married.

I definitely think there's some jealousy to it...not 100%, but there definitely is some.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

oops forgot to answer your question. No I don't think it is jealousy I think it is insecurity.
I think whenever someone has to "talk up" their lives and how great it is are covering up for something they are unhappy with

Message edited 8/10/2006 3:38:56 PM.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

I have single friends that say this because they want to make themselves feel better about not being able to meet anyone. But I also have single friends who truely enjoy being single and would prefer not to be with another person. I dont think any of them say it out of jealousy.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Yes, but I know they will change if they find the right person. I used to think that way too, before DH & I settled down. Everyone has their life happen at their own pace - they are just not ready for that part of life yet.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

i have a few single friends. only one who is dating someone has told me about how she plans to get married and where. she told me all this during my wedding planning. i think she was a little jealous. other than that my other single friends are fine.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Well, being nearly 30 no one is telling me I was too young. I really am glad I didn't get married younger than I did, but I would never say that to anyone in a judgemental way. To each his own. I wouldn't assume jealousy though. Are you constantly talking about your marriage, house, etc? Not in a mean way but in a way that maybe makes them feel they need to defend their choices?

Sometimes I feel like your friends need to change when you have major events (marriage, kids, etc.) because sometimes old friends are just in a different place. i didn't see that as much with my friends, but DH's friends still wanted him vacationing with them, which we don't do apart now.

Message edited 8/10/2006 3:45:59 PM.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

No. I'm 30 and most of my single friends are looking to get married.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Actually I have the opposite, I have some single friends that wish they were married...

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Well, I'm not young, but when I was, NONE of my friends were married. I mean not one. We all really and truly did enjoy being single and really could not imagine making that kind of commitment.

So I think they might really feel the way they do, but it is obnoxious to talk about it a lot to someone who is married.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Posted by MABLE03

Posted by BellaPaige

Posted by MABLE03

oops forgot to answer your question. No I don't think it is jealousy I think it is insecurity.
I think whenever someone has to "talk up" their lives and how great it is are covering up for something they are unhappy with

I definitely agree. Everytime we talk to each other the conversation is always about how much they love being single or they just don't understand who would want to be tie down or they do not want to play housewife or something of the sort. I cannot understand why the constant justification. I feel that just live and enjoy your life.

Yes I agree- Do whats good for you but don't feel the need to rub it in others faces. Thats just immiture and rude.
Also you asked how I would respond to them... the easy way would be to go right back and "talk up" how much you love married life and never want to be single again. But me personally I would kill them with kindness. Smile and nod along - you love being married and your life so no need to go down to their level. Things like how great your marriage are never need to be bragged about IMO

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Posted by BellaPaige

Posted by MABLE03

Posted by BellaPaige

Posted by MABLE03

oops forgot to answer your question. No I don't think it is jealousy I think it is insecurity.
I think whenever someone has to "talk up" their lives and how great it is are covering up for something they are unhappy with

I definitely agree. Everytime we talk to each other the conversation is always about how much they love being single or they just don't understand who would want to be tie down or they do not want to play housewife or something of the sort. I cannot understand why the constant justification. I feel that just live and enjoy your life.

Yes I agree- Do whats good for you but don't feel the need to rub it in others faces. Thats just immiture and rude.
Also you asked how I would respond to them... the easy way would be to go right back and "talk up" how much you love married life and never want to be single again. But me personally I would kill them with kindness. Smile and nod along - you love being married and your life so no need to go down to their level. Things like how great your marriage are never need to be bragged about IMO

I always tell them that single life is no longer for me. I enjoy being married and that I am glad I am stable. There is nothing more I enjoy than waking up beside my darling husband each day.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Posted by nov04libride

Posted by BellaPaige

Posted by MABLE03

Posted by BellaPaige

Posted by MABLE03

oops forgot to answer your question. No I don't think it is jealousy I think it is insecurity.
I think whenever someone has to "talk up" their lives and how great it is are covering up for something they are unhappy with

I definitely agree. Everytime we talk to each other the conversation is always about how much they love being single or they just don't understand who would want to be tie down or they do not want to play housewife or something of the sort. I cannot understand why the constant justification. I feel that just live and enjoy your life.

Yes I agree- Do whats good for you but don't feel the need to rub it in others faces. Thats just immiture and rude.
Also you asked how I would respond to them... the easy way would be to go right back and "talk up" how much you love married life and never want to be single again. But me personally I would kill them with kindness. Smile and nod along - you love being married and your life so no need to go down to their level. Things like how great your marriage are never need to be bragged about IMO

I always tell them that single life is no longer for me. I enjoy being married and that I am glad I am stable. There is nothing more I enjoy than waking up beside my darling husband each day.

I think what mable was saying though is that these types of things are lowering yourself to that level...better to say nothing...

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

I get the opposite who are over 30, single and wishing they weren't.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

my friends that are single want to be in long term relationships and married

anyone that is saying that to you is trying to make themsself feel better about their own situation


its the same reason we will recommend our doctor to someone else- to get reconfirmation that who we are going to is good
same goes with that- the two friends are probably not happy with being single, so they are trying to make their single life sound so great


dont let it get you down

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Posted by preshy7

my friends that are single want to be in long term relationships and married

anyone that is saying that to you is trying to make themsself feel better about their own situation


its the same reason we will recommend our doctor to someone else- to get reconfirmation that who we are going to is good
same goes with that- the two friends are probably not happy with being single, so they are trying to make their single life sound so great


dont let it get you down

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

I have 2 or 3 single friends, most are either involved,engaged,or married...but the single people don't talk like that...

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Yes, I have single friends and most of them want to get married.
Like 1 or 2 LOVES being single and wouldn't change a thing---- the rest of my friends are married

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

It's just insecurity. I think when you get to that age where everyone around you is getting married or having kids you try to justify why you are not there yet. The problem is the only one that has a problem with it is yourself.

Don't take it personal. And if they are really happy with their single lives then good for them. You're happy with your life and their happy with theirs.

Re: Do You Have Single Friends

Posted by preshy7

my friends that are single want to be in long term relationships and married

anyone that is saying that to you is trying to make themsself feel better about their own situation


its the same reason we will recommend our doctor to someone else- to get reconfirmation that who we are going to is good
same goes with that- the two friends are probably not happy with being single, so they are trying to make their single life sound so great


dont let it get you down