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DS won't sleep during the day or night...

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preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

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Blank

DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I just don't know what to do anymore. Not only is he not sleeping much but i'm almost at the point where I can't function from loss of sleep. Even when he sleeps I still can't because I worry about how long he will sleep for.

we put him in the crib for the first time last night and he cried and cried. Until he finally took the paci to fall asleep but 4 hours later he was up with his eyes wide open and would not go back. So I gave in and brought him back to our bed where he still did not sleep. So between 2am-6am was spent with him going to sleep for a half hour and then waking up.

What is keeping him up? I just don't understand...maybe he's not getting enough to eat? He has about 4 feedings a day at 6 ounces each. Even if I did feed him during the night (which the doctor says I don't have to) he still won't go right back to sleep. I give him the paci but all he does is suck on it and then lets go.

He was so tired yesterday that at the evening feeding he did not want to finish his bottle so I waited an hour and that's when he finished it. I have tried everything in the book. I even slept on the floor next to the crib just to make sure he didn't choke or vomit while crying. DH said that next time he wakes up just leave him there. But the thing is that he can stay up for a while and then cry. But the time he goes down again it could be hours...I don't know what else to do for him...

Posted 9/7/06 7:35 AM
 
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KangaMom
...

Member since 1/06

4593 total posts

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Wish I had some advice for you to help but I am sort of in the same boat... DD is not a big sleeper or napper. IF she does nap during the day it's cat naps only and it's in my arms, car seat while driving or in the sling. At night she rarely sleeps more than a 3 - 4 hour stretch. But she does go back to sleep straight after I nurse her during the nights. Sometimes I am exhausted others I am ok! Hang in there Chat Icon

Posted 9/7/06 7:58 AM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Does she cry or just lay there with her eyes wide open?

He does this whether he's in his crib or with us...

Posted 9/7/06 8:03 AM
 

KangaMom
...

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

We don't believe in CIO so she basically will fuss then of course we try to sooth her. I will nurse and DH or I will hold her, walk around with her, rock her... She has slept with us since birth, she was never much of a sleeper...

Posted 9/7/06 8:14 AM
 

Bxgell2
Perfection

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Name:
Beth

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I read in a book once something that I find to be VERY telling - that the best thing for parents is to ACCEPT their baby's personality, and work around it, instead of trying to fit it into their schedule/expectations. Some people have easy babies that rarely cry and sleep very well... those are the lucky ones. But many of us, myself included, have difficult babies. At daycare, they always say Alex has the most "personality", wink wink... meaning, she can be QUITE difficult. She was never a good sleeper, cried often and always wanted to be held. It made for a very difficult first 6 months, but I'll tell you this - everything got much easier when I just accepted the fact that my darling daughter was a difficult baby and to just work around it as best I could instead of trying to fit her into a schedule or routine that would never work for her... the reason why your baby doesn't sleep well could be numerous - gas, reflux, etc. Whatever it is, I seriously suggest you stop trying to force him to sleep and just adapt to him... this is the life of a new mom. It's difficult as hell... but eventually, for me, it was at about 10 months (talk to JCNDD, for her it was until about 11!!) it will get better... but at this point, you just have to work around him instead of wracking your brain in frustration trying to figure him out and force him to sleep...

Posted 9/7/06 8:55 AM
 

monkeybride
My Everything

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

How old is he now? My daughter didn't stop night feeding until around 6 months old. I personally don't listen to everything doctors say because there is no book that applies to what every single baby is going to need.

Is there a chance he has silent reflux? Where it comes up in his throat and is burning but he's not actually spitting up? A lot of reflux babies are bad sleepers. Is he fussy at his feedings? arching his back at all?

Posted 9/7/06 9:57 AM
 

anon
where's winter?

Member since 11/05

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Message edited 2/8/2007 3:13:50 PM.

Posted 9/7/06 10:37 AM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Sometimes he spits up milk when he burps but it's not all the time and sometimes he's fussy at a feeding and sometimes not. So I don't know if it is silent reflux.

I know it sounds like I am forcing him to sleep but honestly i'm not. I just don't want him with bags under his eyes. Because I'm telling he will not sleep at all! At night he goes to bed between 8-9 and by 1-2 he's up. Now if I try giving him a bottle he won't go back to sleep right away. That's the problem. If I just let it be with the way he sleeps then growing up he'll always be getting up 1-2 am and think it's ok...

He is 3 months. I am going to give it another week and then I think I may take him to a sleeping center to have him evaulated.

Posted 9/7/06 10:55 AM
 

Bxgell2
Perfection

Member since 5/05

16438 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Posted by bedda26
I know it sounds like I am forcing him to sleep but honestly i'm not. I just don't want him with bags under his eyes. Because I'm telling he will not sleep at all! At night he goes to bed between 8-9 and by 1-2 he's up. Now if I try giving him a bottle he won't go back to sleep right away. That's the problem. If I just let it be with the way he sleeps then growing up he'll always be getting up 1-2 am and think it's ok...



Ok, see, what I think you don't understand is that sleeping from 9pm-2am and waking up and STAYING up for a few hours is TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY NORMAL for a 3 month old baby. My daughter did this until she was 6 months old. Will he be a little more cranky? Yes, but it won't physically HURT him and this won't continue for the rest of his life. It's a phase that most young babies go through. Most start outgrowing it between 3 and 5 months. Others take longer (like myself and Jcndd). But it truly is not cause for the concern and I really don't think it requires a sleep center evaluation. Like I said before, this is the life of a young baby and what we sign up for as young mothers. There's a reason why people tell you to get as much sleep as you can while you're pregnant!

Edited to say - just because he's waking at 1/2am and won't go back to sleep it does not mean this will last for the rest of his life. With time, as he gets older, he'll probably grow out of it as his system and body matures. If he doesn't, when he's older, you may try implementing CIO, though now, at 3 months, he's probably too young...

Message edited 9/7/2006 10:59:48 AM.

Posted 9/7/06 10:58 AM
 

anon
where's winter?

Member since 11/05

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Message edited 2/8/2007 3:14:19 PM.

Posted 9/7/06 11:03 AM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Yeah I have the book but don't find the information very helpful when your baby has other ideas.

See now he's been sleeping for a while because he's making up for lost time. Then his feeding schedule for the day gets screwed up and he'll definitely wake up more during the night for a feeding...Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I just want to make sure he'll be alright that's all.

Posted 9/7/06 11:11 AM
 

jrbaby
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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Just a suggestion: You had said you were feeding him 4 bottles with 6 ounces. How often do you feed him? We found that feeding DS less milk more often made him a much happier baby. It may be more time consuming, but it worked really well for us.

Another thought, based on a recommendation I read Baby Wise. Although I don't agree with everything, I found it very helpful. We stick to the feeding, playtime and then naptime routine. No set times or timeperiods, but sticking to this routine makes naptime much easier for us.

Let me know if you need any help with it.

Message edited 9/7/2006 12:01:06 PM.

Posted 9/7/06 11:53 AM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Posted by jrbaby

Just a suggestion: You had said you were feeding him 4 bottles with 6 ounces. How often do you feed him? We found that feeding DS less milk more often made him a much happier baby. It may be more time consuming, but it worked really well for us.

Another thought, based on a recommendation I read Baby Wise. Although I don't agree with everything, I found it very helpful. We stick to the feeding, playtime and then naptime routine. No set times or timeperiods, but sticking to this routine makes naptime much easier for us.

Let me know if you need any help with it.




How did you do it?

Should I still take him to the center to have evaluated?

Posted 9/7/06 12:07 PM
 

jrbaby
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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

How often are you feeding him? Are you working or are you home with him all the time?

Posted 9/7/06 12:14 PM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I am feeding him approx. every 4 hours and he takes 6 sometimes even 7 ounces.

He just had a bottle right now and took 8! It all depends on his mood...

Posted 9/7/06 12:17 PM
 

jrbaby
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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I started feeding DS every 3 - 3 1/2 hours (unless he was sleeping). Are you feeding him formula? Does he burp during the bottles?

Posted 9/7/06 12:20 PM
 

MatteosMom
LIF Adult

Member since 8/06

1494 total posts

Name:
Carolyn

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I had a difficult baby too, for the first 2 months though, crying for hours and wouldn't sleep much. But 4 hour stretch is actually pretty good for a 3 month old. I understand what you are saying, we kept trying to put our son back to sleep right after he'd wake up from that 2-3am bottle and he'd stay awake. We just kept the room dark and rocked him and just basically waited it out until he was finally tired. Now he's sleeping 7-9 hours most nights. Granted, that could mean getting up at 4 or 5am but he did sleep a good stretch.

We read The Happiest Baby on the Block and started swaddling and the 5 S's in the book and it was a lifesaver. It took a little time for us to get the hang of it and for him to get used to the swaddle but he loves it.

Posted 9/7/06 12:21 PM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Sometimes he burps after 4 onuces...

he does not like to be be swaddled at all...

A cuple of weeks ago he was actually giggling a little...now he stopped...he used to babble alot and now not as much...
At least he still gives a smile...

Posted 9/7/06 12:37 PM
 

anon
where's winter?

Member since 11/05

2209 total posts

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Message edited 2/8/2007 3:14:29 PM.

Posted 9/7/06 12:41 PM
 

jrbaby
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Member since 11/05

1204 total posts

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I would try feeding him more often. DS is 4 months and eats 6 ounces every 3 - 3.5 hours. I also try to burp him at least once during the bottle and once after. We also try to give him a couple minutes break during the bottle to let the food settle just by holding him upright. After DS eats, we change him and then have playtime. He spends some time on his gym, tummy time and on his bouncy seat (with us giving him toys).

He usually plays about 1 to 2 hours then begins to get tired. He then goes down for a 30 - 60 minute nap and the we start the routine over again.

In the morning, he goes down for a 1-2 hour nap. DS is 4 months and is sleeping about 8-9 hours a night.

This is just a suggestion that works for us. He is pretty much adjusted to it and is much happier.

Please let me know if you have any other questions. I'd be glad to try and help.

Posted 9/7/06 12:47 PM
 

monkeybride
My Everything

Member since 5/05

20541 total posts

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Here's another suggestion and please don't take this the wrong way. Stop trying to force him to have a set schedule. Some babies don't take to scheduling well at all and honestly at 3 months old you can't expect him to eat and sleep at the same time each day for the same amount of time. Try feeding him on demand in small amounts instead of trying to schedule his feedings.
I don't think he needs a sleep evaluation honestly. He's 3 months old and still adjusting to life. If he's not in pain or sick then it's just the luck of the draw. Some people get easy, sleepy babies and some don't.
I am learning more and more each day that being a mother is the hardest job you will ever have and the one you will get the least amount of praise and recognition for.
Chat Icon

Posted 9/7/06 12:52 PM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Posted by jrbaby

I would try feeding him more often. DS is 4 months and eats 6 ounces every 3 - 3.5 hours. I also try to burp him at least once during the bottle and once after. We also try to give him a couple minutes break during the bottle to let the food settle just by holding him upright. After DS eats, we change him and then have playtime. He spends some time on his gym, tummy time and on his bouncy seat (with us giving him toys).

He usually plays about 1 to 2 hours then begins to get tired. He then goes down for a 30 - 60 minute nap and the we start the routine over again.

In the morning, he goes down for a 1-2 hour nap. DS is 4 months and is sleeping about 8-9 hours a night.

This is just a suggestion that works for us. He is pretty much adjusted to it and is much happier.

Please let me know if you have any other questions. I'd be glad to try and help.



He has the ocean wonders gym i'll have to give that a try but it has to be pu together...

Posted 9/7/06 12:58 PM
 

NJmom
.

Member since 8/05

4987 total posts

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Posted by monkeybride

Here's another suggestion and please don't take this the wrong way. Stop trying to force him to have a set schedule. Some babies don't take to scheduling well at all and honestly at 3 months old you can't expect him to eat and sleep at the same time each day for the same amount of time. Try feeding him on demand in small amounts instead of trying to schedule his feedings.
I don't think he needs a sleep evaluation honestly. He's 3 months old and still adjusting to life. If he's not in pain or sick then it's just the luck of the draw. Some people get easy, sleepy babies and some don't.
I am learning more and more each day that being a mother is the hardest job you will ever have and the one you will get the least amount of praise and recognition for.
Chat Icon



I completely agree! It doesn't sound like there is anything wrong with your baby. It sounds like he is getting sleep (although maybe not on the schedule you want) and he's getting plenty to eat. Try not to worry so much. Every baby is different. I'd try to just follow his lead and see what happens. My only suggestion for the waking at night...keep the lights off or very dim and keep your interaction with him to a minimum that way he knows it's not play time and will hopefully go back to sleep when he sees there's nothing interesting going on.

Posted 9/7/06 1:08 PM
 

anon
where's winter?

Member since 11/05

2209 total posts

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Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

Message edited 2/8/2007 3:14:42 PM.

Posted 9/7/06 1:13 PM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

Member since 5/05

9340 total posts

Name:
Blank

Re: DS won't sleep during the day or night...

I guess i'll have to see how it goes...

Posted 9/7/06 1:19 PM
 
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