Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

This is such a tough situation and there is no right/wrong thing to do. If you do what you feel in your heart it will all turn out ok!

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

I don't think that is anything I would ever be able to forget, and I would definitely have a hard time getting the trust back, if I ever could trust him again. It would involve counseling individually, and couples counseling. I don't think there are "accidents"--if he did this, it was because he wanted to escape his regular life--maybe go back to being single for a night--and he has deeper issues he needs to work through.

It bothers me that he used being drunk as an excuse. I think what I could not get past is that for five minutes or a half hour, he was not married in his eyes, or he chose to completely disregard his vows and the trust of the person he married.

I may sound harsh, but I hold the people I love to a very high standard, since I trust them with my heart.

Message edited 2/23/2006 6:48:14 PM.

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

No I wouldnt leave him for that, but I think that the relationship would need so much work and it might take years to get over it, but I think I took him for the good and the bad, and would at least try to work through the bad....but That doesnt mean the end result couldnt change a year from now.


Itold you what happened to my BF...She still says she thinks about making him leave on occasion and never knows what the end result ever will be...

Hang in there

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

I am so sorry you are dealing with this

I would like to think that I would try to fight for my marriage, but I just don't know if I could recover from him kissing someone else. For me, it would mean strong feelings are there and I don't know if I could honestly look at him the same way. If it were me, I know I could never tell my Mom if I were going to try and work it out.

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

I would try to forgive him "on the surface" but deep down I would still be devestated and the relationship would probably not work out in the long run. But thats just me and I am very emotional and critical and sensitive. Only you know your DH and the right thing to do - trust your gut.

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

I don't think a kiss is marriage ending for me - it might be for DH if the situation was reversed.

for you.

Message edited 2/23/2006 8:53:29 PM.

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

I wouldn't end my marriage over that.

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

You should go with what you feel is right ...not what others think is right. It is your marriage no one elses.

Good luck!

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

I don't have an answer or solution for you, just .

Re: Needed Advice -For those of you who know the story...

i don't think that i would end the marriage but it would take some time for me to trust him again. i think the fact tthat it was unplanned, he was drunk (not in full control of his actions) and admitted what he did alre all positive signs that he isn't a habitual cheater.

ETA: i know unconvential but maybe you should call Dr. Joy Browne. she is very well known psychologist and hosts a show on 710 AM. she offers very candid and and direct advice. you could always provide a fake name and disguse your voice. if interested the # is 800-544-7070,. you could also email her through the radio website .

Message edited 2/24/2006 12:17:28 PM.