If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

If you have more than 2 kids, or are planning for more than 2, what made you decide to go for more?

DH and I are pretty sure we are going to TTC for a 3rd child.

However, a small part of me can't help feel like we would be rocking the boat since we have 2 beautiful, healthy children. Things seem more practical with 2 (we aren't out numbered, everyone fits in a normal size car, lots of other silly stuff). But still, we are pretty sure we want more.

What tipped the scales for you?

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

I will 99% go for a 3rd and mainly b/c I just don't feel finished. That's probably selfish, and an immature reason, but that's how it is for me. Colin, in my heart, is not my last child. And maybe after the next one, I'll feel the same - at some point I'll have to call it quits but at this stage, I would love another child.

And, like you, I do think about "rocking the boat". Colin is such a great baby, as was Ryan. Both healthy - I couldn't ask for more. Yet, I guess I will ask for more if I go for a third.

So, selfishness and greed tip the scales for me?

Message edited 6/15/2010 2:36:37 PM.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

Thanks for this post... I know we won't TTC for a few years if we decide to at all, but I'd love to hear the responses!

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

ah, the magic question

I do not know what we are going to do. I DO know that I am not going to have another until miki goes to school. By then (2012), I will be 36 so who knows how I will feel then

Kevin HAS mentioned having another though more than once.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

I am so blessed with my 2 boys...such good boys and I often think about stopping now while the going is good

BUT

I came from a fam of 3 kids and I wanted 3 kids for me and DH. So sad to say but i would get preggo ( i LOVE being preggo) tomorrow if $$ wasnt an option

This tips the scale for me:-my boss has a B and a Girl and says she always regretted NOT going for the 3rd

Those with 2 kids often regret NOT having a 3rd but you will never hear someone who had a 3rd REGRET having him/her

Message edited 6/15/2010 2:56:21 PM.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

I had an extremely hard pregnancy for DS. I risked it once more to have DD but I am not willing to do it again. Also, I feel like we can provide the kind of lifestyle I want to give my kids with 2. Not that we could not provide for 3, it is just I want to be able to give my children certain things and I think a third would make that a lot harder to do. Of course, if we are blessed with a third we would be happy, but we are not trying to have another. Emotionally I am happy with this decision.

ETS: I think I misread your post, so I guess mine is the other view....I am one of three kids. I love both of my brothers and am glad that there are three of us.

Message edited 6/15/2010 3:29:08 PM.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

I am expecting #3 in a few weeks and for us I wasn't ready to say no completely to a 3rd. I'm sure DH wouldn've been fine with whatever I wanted, but for some reason I didn't feel finished. I have a boy and a girl and are expecting another girl. While sometimes I think I might be crazy since I'm out of the baby zone (kids are 3 1/2 and 5 1/2) and I'm feeling a bit out of my element being pregnant this time, something just made me want a third. I am done for sure after this one, but don't think I could have ever really been at peace with being done for good with just 2.

And sometimes I still question how it will work out since logistically we were great as a family of 4. A son for DH a daughter for me, double sinks in the kids bathroom...no fighting. LOL... even numbers for days on the amusement park rides, etc etc etc...

BUT now to hear my 5 and 3 year old talk so excitedly about how we are getting a new baby very soon and how much they are looking forward to it is just amazing. When #2 was born, #1 was still a baby...had just turned two, so he didn't get it and he doens't know life without his sister. But with #3 being a few years later, I feel like this is not just a gift for me and my husband, but for my first two children...and what a great family thing it will be when we bring their new sister home. I am looking forward to that dynamic in our house in a few weeks. Its super fun to sit at the dinner table and talk about what we should name her and how DD wants her to be her roommate with bunkbeds when the baby gets bigger.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

We're expecting our 3rd within the next few weeks. We just like the idea of a bigger family and the kids having each other, especially since our siblings aren't looking like they're going to be having children any time soon, if at all. I can't even explain it, but it was pretty much a natural expectation for the two of us. Heck, we would definitely have 4 if it wasn't for the fact that we're getting up there in age. (4 may still be on the table.)

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

I don't know really. It was always understood that I wanted at least three children...my DH knew that I would not settle for less and if I happened to want to stop at two, then that was my call. Once we had the two, DH said he actually might have been a bit sad if I decided to stop (even though I think he would have been happy with only one!).

My DH is the youngest of three and I am the older of two. Growing up I ALWAYS wanted a larger family; my dad is the youngest of five and I always thought that was so cool. I guess I wanted someone else to turn to when my sister was being a B!tC#.

I am expecting #3 in October and we are both thrilled to pieces. Actually, I really, really, really wish we could have four, but that's not really in the cards mostly because of age. And well, I guess you have to stop some time!

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

It's funny... DH and I toyed with the idea of having an only child. Well, more DH than me.

Now I am expecting DC #2, and depending on how things go, could potentially see us with a #3 in about 4 years...

I don't feel done now... but may once #2 arrives. We'll see..........

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

Posted by SweetCaroline

I will 99% go for a 3rd and mainly b/c I just don't feel finished. That's probably selfish, and an immature reason, but that's how it is for me. Colin, in my heart, is not my last child. And maybe after the next one, I'll feel the same - at some point I'll have to call it quits but at this stage, I would love another child.

And, like you, I do think about "rocking the boat". Colin is such a great baby, as was Ryan. Both healthy - I couldn't ask for more. Yet, I guess I will ask for more if I go for a third.

So, selfishness and greed tip the scales for me?

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

Mine are 2 and 4 - for the last 2 years, I've been saying I'm 99% DONE.

I feel slightly less *done* these days (85% ), and I know Al would be on board with #3, but I just can't wrap my head around the logistics: the sleepless nights, being outnumbered, 3 car seats fitting in a car, pushing my luck...

I think if we wind up with #3 it won't be a conscious decision but moreso the lack of planning.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

Posted by -Lisa-

I think if we wind up with #3 it won't be a conscious decision but moreso the lack of planning.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

#3 for us will only come through adoption, foster care....

I am very done having my own.
I don't crave the infant stage.

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

I want 3 at the very least- I would love more! I am one of 5, and I always loved being part of a big family. I always wanted to have a big family too. My husband is only one of 2 and always said he didn't want more than 2, but since having our son 4.5 months ago, he's now saying he thinks 3 would be doable I'm hoping I can squeeze one or 2 more out of him

Re: If you have more than 2 kids or are planning to have more than 2 kids

Posted by ddunne2

Posted by -Lisa-

I think if we wind up with #3 it won't be a conscious decision but moreso the lack of planning.

You laugh...but this is how my #3 happened!