Grandparent watching kids

I have been trying to figure out what i can do as far as daycare is concerned....

I recently found out that the daycare here at my job is about 500 per month...

I was talking about that with my mom and she tells me that she is going to be retiring soon and would watch my child 2-3 times a week. Which is EXTREMELY wonderful of her.

But i feel guilty. She had a lung cancer a few years back and had part of her lung removed PLUS she has emphazema...SO breathing and running around doing things is hard for her...

So i don't know if i really want to ask ehr to help out...not that i did ask her, she volunteered

Anyone else feel bad asking their parents to watch their children?

Re: Grandparent watching kids

Re: Grandparent watching kids

have you checked into a place that does it on a sliding scale. maybe they can help. i know someplace will do that. maybe that can help

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Both of our parents are chomping at the bit to watch our twins - though we haven't formally asked them yet.

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I know my mom was disappointed that we left LI because she was fully planning to watch our kids if/when we had them, even though it would not be in her best interest. She has really bad arthritis and is one of those people who takes chances when she shouldn't. I really think my dad would have vetoed the idea for that reason. So it's made things a little easier, that we won't be close enough for that to be an option.

If my mom was healthy and we were nearby I would have loved for her to babysit.

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Re: Grandparent watching kids

I would let your mom watch your kids - she wouldn't offer unless she really wanted to.

I'm a SAHM but on weekends and sometimes overnight I drop Ava off at my parents and they are like 2 kids in a candy store - they absolutely LOVE having her. It gives them so much joy.

Sometimes I feel bad about it but then I realize that they love her just as much as I do and if there was ever a point where they couldn't handle it they'd tell me. Plus its always nice to see Ava getting spoiled by them - I get such a kick out of it.

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Re: Grandparent watching kids

I wouldn't feel bad - I know with my parents they were dieing to watch my son. Unfortunatley for me they are not retired, but I know my mom would love to watch my little ones!

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I think that if your mom is putting the offer out there its something that she really wants to do. If you don't let her at least some of the time it might hurt her feelings.


My mom watches my son about 20 hours a week...she calls him her little buddy...and she is so excited to see him...even when she is not watching him she scoops him up to show if off to everyone. She doesn't watch my sister's son because my sister is a SAHM and my mom says all the time that she loves my nephew to pieces...but she know that she is closer with my son because of the time spent with him...she truelly treasures it.

Message edited 5/13/2005 9:27:28 AM.

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Red, I think you should try it out with her and see how she does. If she offered I'm sure it's something that she may be able to handle. I would give it a shot and then take it from there. That baby would also keep her company.

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Re: Grandparent watching kids

From personal experience of friends of mine, if you have grandparents that are available to help with daycare, it is good.

However, I've observed that it is not overly healthy for the grandparents or the children if it is a full week. Two to three days a week is okay. But more than that can be very taxing on grandparents and not very stimulating for kids. Kids need to be around other kids to learn social skills and interaction.

Basically what I'm saying is there needs to be a balance based on my experience and the experience of people I know.

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I hope to be able to have my parents watch my future children. They are already thinking of it now and we aren't even TTC.

Parents want this SO much (well, a lot of them do)

It would probably bring her SO much joy if you let your mom babysit. It may even improve her health (making her smile)

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thanks everyone...you are right. I guess we will try it out and see how it goes...

i guess i just feel bad...

I am sure she will like taking care of a baby...and i do hope she feels better for it...I just don't want her to feel she HAS to do it...

I guess i will just see how it goes...thanks

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I would definately let her do it in the begining, no chasing around baby, and then take it from there. My parents are still in a hefty mortage, my mom is a nurse and will have to work for awhile. so not an option for us.

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I would feel too bad to do it. My mom put in her time raising me and my brother, and to take on something like that in her 60s would be so much to ask. An occasional weekend or night is one thing, but to have her commit to 2 or 3 days a week (which you need to do to let daycare know when the baby would be there) would be a huge imposition, maybe more than she imagines. If she has a day not feeling well, or is having trouble getting up and ready, she would have to for the baby. To me retirement is their time to enjoy themselves, not take on an even more taxing job of a different type (sitting here all day isn't physically demanding as chasing and lifting a baby would be). But my mom is in her 60s--maybe a younger grandma in her 50s would be different...

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If her eyes light up when she talks about it and she gets a goofy smile on her face at the thought of it, she wants it!

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I wish that was an option we us.
My mother is 50 and nowhere near retiring, she moving to florida in september and his mom is going through menopause and I honestly don't trust her with Alia.
So that's not an option for us but if she volunteered than why not, at least your baby is not going to be with a stranger.
and it will be only 2-3 times so that's not too bad for her either.

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If you can work something out where you can put your child in day care 2-3 days a week and have your parents help out on the other 1/2 that would be great.

When I first had my daughter, my mom, my mil & a very close girlfriend watched her. At first it worked out great, but then I started running into complications where one of them had a conflict and couldn't help out which meant that I had to take a day off from work, etc. Although they were not charging us and it helped us, I just couldn't rely on the fact that "things come up". One of the pros on day care is that they are very reliable and you don't have to worry about "conflicts". They open early/close late, etc.

So when Delaney was about 7 months, we decided it was time to look into part time day care. I send her to Tutor Time 3 days a week (i work from home one day and my husband is home with her one day) At first, I was a mess about leaving her with strangers, by the 2nd, 3rd week, I realized it was the best thing we could have done for her. It is a very very difficult decision to make because your child is the most precious thing in the world and you're trusting the fact that people will care for them as you do.

Whatever you decide to do, you'll be comfortable with your decision and your child will adjust to whatever situation they are in. Good luck with your decision.

It sounds as if there are alot of working mothers on these boards so it might make you feel better that you're not alone!

Message edited 5/13/2005 1:30:26 PM.

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Re: Grandparent watching kids

I told my mom if she wants grandkids, she has to retire But she hasn't agreed to that yet...

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For the most part when they offer, the thought of being with the kids fills their day. I am an only child and my parents LIVE for my kids. They are after all much cuter than I am. The kids keep them young, it's good for the heart and soul.

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if your mom offered you should give it a try. if she feels she is able to then it would be a great thing for both of you. my mom watched my sisters children for most of there loves there 6 and 4 and she is soo close with them. there is no one more trustworthy then a grandmother

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