Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I am not a lawyer, Dh si and is considering getting a new position.He currecntly works for the city as an Attorney but for various reasons is considering leaving. Right now he has a ton of flexibility which he knows he will have to give up some of if and when he gets a new position. My question is how many hours do you work and how hard is it with the kids? I teach so I have flexibility in a sense BUT he is used to seeinghis kids a lot and one reservation he has about leaving teh city is his time at home with family.

Aldo, I am goggn to create another post abotu this on Career but did you ever change form one type iof law to another. He is also hesitant bc he feels what he does is very sopecific and he feels limited in his experience. He feels he may have to take a pay cut. How hard is it to switch feilds of law?

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I'm not a lawyer, but I am a paralegal and I can tell you what I have seen.

It totally depends on the firm that your DH is working for, I'd say that at the very least, in the beginning, it will be tough as he will have to "prove" himself and probably work longer hours and put in a lot of time. But probably with a shorter commute, that will be easier as well. And I really think it depends on the firm.

I can't answer you about switching from one type of law to another though.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

Thanks

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

My DH is an attorney. He's in private practice (mostly real estate and wills/trusts--that sort of thing) and he's legal counsel/owner of a title co.

Theoretically, he's out of the house from 9am to 6pm, but he has so many other things going on (for instance, he's an adjunct professor) that those aren't always his true hours. However, he can be pretty flexible if necessary. He always takes DD to school in the mornings and his weekends are ALWAYS free. His company is very local, so that's definitely convenient too.

The downside of private practice is that you don't have any benefits; this wasn't a problem when I worked, and thankfully once the title company got up and running, we we got medical. Also, in private practice you don't work, you don't get paid. Can I tell you how much he was on the phone in Sorrento at our honeymoon?! Needless to say, he couldn't take much/any time off directly following the girls' births. Nevertheless, the hours still can be somewhat flexible. But again, now with the company, he's not necessarily running around doing closings as he used to...

I don't know how easy it is to go from an "office" job to private practice, but in the end, it's been really fantastic for raising a family.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I'm an attorney but I don't practice. I went into finance right out of law school and work 9-5:30 usually, and never on weekends. I see DS 1 hr in the morning, and 1 hr at night.

Not sure what field he is in, but if he was doing any kind of securitization work, he can look at going inhouse in a financial company. The hours are typically better than at a law firm.

My DH is also an attorney and is a litigator. He used to work in the city doing med mal work, construction accident cases, etc. but moved to a firm in LI 3 years ago and does trusts and estates now (but also as a litigator).

In both jobs he was out of the house from 9-8, and some weekends. He rarely sees DS at night and I'm usually the one who takes off for dr.'s appts, sick days, etc.


What kind of work does your DH do?

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I am a lawyer. I am a commercial litigator at a NYC firm. I was at one of the top firms in the country prior to being at my current firm. At my prior firm, it would be extremely difficult to be a parent. Most moms had to go part time, and even as part time, most worked a MINIMUM of 10 hour days, had fridays *off* but almost always had to do some work from home on fridays and on the weekends. Partners also looked down upon you for being part time and often wouldnt give you good work, or would make you feel guilty for not being in the office more often.

At my current firm, it is MUCH better, but still difficult. There is always a chance I have to work on the weekends. I haven't had to come in on a weekend and can work from home, but it could be 0 hours, 2 hours or a full day or two. Same thing for nights. It's like you're "on call" 24/7. My hours in the office are very reasonable and they have worked with me on that. I get in around 8:30 and leave around 5:30, but I work more often than I'm in the office. Feel free to FM any more specific questions.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I am an attorney, but stopped practicing once I got pregnant. My firm lef tme with little to no flexibility in schedule and I knew I couldn't raise a family under those conditions. Luckily, I also have my RN license,so I was able to go back into the medical field once I was ready to go back to work.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

DH and I are both attorneys. I used to work longer hours before I had DS, but now I have to pick him up by 6:30 at the latest. I've been back to work for 2 months and have somewhat eased back in. I used to have a lot more night meetings all over the state, but so far, the most I've had is 2 per week. There are some weeks when I don't have any late night meetings. It's tough to balance work and family in general, but it's especially hard when I have a meeting and don't get home until DS is already alseep. DH works long hours too. There are many nights when DS is already asleep by the time DH comes home.

Both DH and I changed fields, but it was only after practicing for 2 or 3 years. I also went from practicing in NYC to CT. There's a lot to learn when practicing in a new area, but we're both much happier in our current fields.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

thanks for all your responses

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I'm a legal services attorney. My schedule is 9-5. The only time I bring work home to do is IF I absolutely need to pick up DD before I finished something that is absolutely needed for court the next day. That hasn't happened since I came back full-time. There are days when I'm in the office until 5:30PM or 6:00PM, but that is b/c I need to have a conversation with my immediate supervisor who covers 3 offices and she isn't always available when I need her to be.

The salary sucks, but the flexibility is awesome. For example - today DD is here with me at work for 1/2 day so my babysitter could take care of something.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I FM'd you but figured I'd post anyway - I'm a civil rights attorney for the federal government. I get the best of all worlds - the pay is pretty damn good (6 figures) and at the same time, I have unbelievable hours and flexibility.

I work from 8:30-5pm. My commute is about 20 minutes, so I see lots of Alex in the AM and I pick her up from school by 5:30pm. I have the option of working an extra hour everyday, which enables me to take a day off every other week. Depending on my mood, I'll work from 7:30-5pm to take advantage of it.

I can make my own hours virtually - I can come in anytime between 6:30-9:30. If I come in at 6:30, I leave by 3pm.

I can also work from home up to two days a week, which I take advantage of. I also get time off for certain medical appointments, parent-teacher conferences, and helping with school outings.

I have NEVER worked past 6pm, and have NEVER worked on the weekend at this job. And, on top of it all, the work is very challenging, interesting and rewarding

For anyone interested in legal federal employment, check usajobs.com - that's where the agencies post available positions for each geographic area.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I am an attorney - work for the government. Much better flexibility and pretty good pay. The quality of life as an attorney in a government position is much better than a private firm. I used to also work in the private sector before I had DS - I would never be able to do it with DS. I worked in the city in a big firm and got to work at 9:30 and left around 7:30 - doesn't include the commute. The majority of private sector work includes billing - you must bill for all the work that you do - therefore, no billing, no bonus or worse. The pressure on the associates is really high. I am sure your husband has been reading the papers or the blogs on the atmosphere in most of the firms - right now they are laying off tons of people or cutting/freezing salaries. Not a happy place out there for attorneys. Many of my friends/famiilies are partners and associates at firms in manhattan and they don't get home until 8, at the earliest and they work on the weekends. With the economy the way it is, attorneys are working longer hours out of fear of being cut. As far as moving to a different area of law, sometimes firms feel that if you are in a specific practice area (i.e. criminal) for a long time, you are pigeonholed into that area, so they won't hire you to go into a new area. As far as pay cut, in these economic times, it is more likely than not that he will be facing a paycut. I go on the website abovethelaw.com - lots of gossip on firms - whether there are cuts, layoffs at the firm, good atmosphere, etc. Good luck.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

It's a hard question to answer w/o knowing what field your DH is heading into. I'm an atty but I don't practice much now. I'm a p/t prosecutor now. Working for gov affords probably the most flexibility you can get in terms of good hrs and good benefits so it's a given if he's going from public to private that it will be more hours. That being said, i have interviewed with and worked for several firms and they were all up front about the # of billable hours expected so he should know exactly how many hrs per week or month are expected of him. If he doesn't, he needs to ask. Then you will have all the answers to your questions. And be clear billable hours don't translate exactly to how many hours he works b/c not every minute of every day can be billed so you'll have to add to whatever the # is that they tell him. For ex., if you have to bill 40-45 hrs per week you'll have to work more than that, probably more like 50. HTH

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I recently left the firm I had been working at for more than 10 years in part because it became too difficult to do with children. I worked in medical malpractice defense and billable hours are what it is all about. Although I was able to leave by office by 6:30 every night, I would come home, spend some time with my kids and then, after they were in bed, work some more. I would wake up in the middle of the night thinking about my cases. It got to the point where the fact that I was so unhappy at work was making me unhappy on the weekends too. Kids pick up on that and I wanted to at least be able to enjoy what time I did have with them. At this point, I am looking into various options for a career change. Although I miss my paycheck, I do not regret leaving.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I am an attorney and it really depends on the firm. I am very lucky in that my job let me go to 3 days a week when i had my DC. On the days, I work, I don't get much time with my children. But I make up for it on my days off. My firm is very flexible with us as long as you get your work done which means if you need to get out at 3:00 it's not a problem but on the flip end if you have a motion due, you stay and get it done. I am also friends with attorneys who do trials and that takes a lot out of you when you are on trial. I also have friends that are mandated to stay until at least 7:00 every night. I know I am probably not much help but can he maybe ask his friends about the firm he is looking into and see f they know anything about it? Plus like Kate said, you must prove yourself in the beginning before being able to take advantage of any perks.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

Another federal attorney here. I can't extol the virtues of federal employment any better than Beth did. IMO, the federal government is the employer of choice in terms of flexibility, pay and general working conditions. In addition, the defacto maternity leave policy with my agency is one year.

My agency also allows up to 3 days a week of work at home, for experienced attorneys. Because of the flexibility associated with my job, I've been able to continue to work and also be as close to a "full time" mommy as humanly possible.

Re: Any Lawyer Mommie or Daddies out there? Question

I worked at one of the top big firms in NYC that you hear all the stories about - they are all true. My hours were awful and I worked all the time. Yes, you make big $$$ but you work for every penny of it. After DS was born I never went back and when I do go back to work I will never go to a firm like that. So if this is the route he is considering I would give a lot of thought to it