ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

2 year old girl

Extremely poor eye contact
No speech
Language problems (can not understand or respond when talked to)
Does not play with peers or care that they are there
Does not go to other family members or other adults other than one care giver/ does not like to be held by both sets of grandparents, family members
Engages in anything visual to the eye loves her Nabi and IPad for visual stimulation
I've seen her flap her hands but usually when highly excited or angry, this could be normal toddler behavior I think
Receiving currently speech therapy only

This is a child of someone I know. The mother is very sensitive and I'm afraid that her child has an ASD disorder just based on what I see. I have a son with pddnos and this all looks to familiar to me. I think the mom is afraid of this she has a hard time opening up. Nothing was mentioned thus far to her. Do you think her therapists are still waiting it out? Could I be wrong thinking she's on the spectrum? What do you think based on my observations? I of course will not mention what i think but i just feel bad because i see the moms frustration and hurt when her child is not engaged when everyones around. The toddler has been receiving speech for about 9 months.

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

It's tough. Especially if it's someone you don't have that kind of relationship with.

Recently, I was at a party and an acquaintance was explaining some frustrations with her son.

I opened up about what we put into place for our child, because hers sounds like he is struggling with similar issues.

A couple other of people joined the conversation and stated that so many kids get services these days, it's really not that big of a deal.

You can only hope that it will plant a seed.

Unfortunately, many parents ways of coping is by burying their head in the sand.

I feel that a lot of parents are at either end of the spectrum so to speak when it comes to helping their kid(s). Some want to learn everything they can and put it into place; others not so much.

I also would hope that the speech therapist does the right thing and makes their observations known to both the parents as well as whoever they need to report to.

Message edited 9/24/2013 8:03:21 PM.

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

I think if told she will act on it. She also has parents that don't believe she needs anything and blames environment/not being taken out of the house etc... I personally don't believe in that. If whenever we tried to discuss the issues or speech therapy the mom (the grandma of the toddler)would but in and breakup the conversation and say she's fine, she's fine...but just something is not right. If it was just that (speech) I don't think the mom would have such of a worried face. I actually think they may have mentioned it and are still giving her time. I don't know hopefully maybe I am wrong.

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Posted by adeline27

I think if told she will act on it. She also has parents that don't believe she needs anything and blames environment/not being taken out of the house etc... I personally don't believe in that. If whenever we tried to discuss the issues or speech therapy the mom (the grandma of the toddler)would but in and breakup the conversation and say she's fine, she's fine...but just something is not right. If it was just that (speech) I don't think the mom would have such of a worried face. I actually think they may have mentioned it and are still giving her time. I don't know hopefully maybe I am wrong.

ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

My honest opinion is to leave it alone. I'm sure she knows something is not right and it is not your responsibility to point it out to her. Her therapists will most likely suggest evaluations and I'm sure her ped would as well. Parents deal with this is all different ways and it shouldn't be pushed unless she specifically asks you.

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

I would probably say something. I think there is a common belief that the therapist will say something. The challenge at that age, though, is that it's really hard for a lay person to determine what is typical for a 2 year old and what are red flags. My DS was getting PT and speech and was in daycare FT when he started services at around 17 months. The ped referred us for speech but didn't seem concerned about things I was mentioning about gross motor delays. Daycare mentioned nothing about delays at all. When I mentioned I was getting him evaluated and asked them for input, I got a list of things they noticed, mostly with speech delays.

Just before he turned 2, his PT recommended another special ed eval (we had one at around 15 or 16 months and no issues were noted). After the second eval, there were concerns and we were told to get a psych eval. Ped didn't suggest any of the evals, and neither did the speech therapist.

My point is that sometimes even the professionals have a "wait and see" attitude about it. When I talked to daycare, they were sort of like "well, we were watching him and were going to recommend an eval if we didn't see improvements soon." Speech therapist was wonderful, but at that time, she was fairly new and didn't know him that well yet. Peds are not all well schooled in autism. I have heard stories about how peds have said to parents "oh, he's fine, he's a boy, they are slower to talk." One mom had other kids, she didn't accept that and had the kid evaluated. Now that I know more about this, I go to my fellow autism moms with questions before I go to my doctor. Parents with kids on the spectrum often know more about it than doctors do, IMO.

Even when the psychologist diagnosed my son, she said at his age, with his delays, it was tough to determine 100% if he was on the spectrum. He got services at the most crucial time and I am grateful for that. I would rather err on the side of being pushy and alienating this mom than see the child not getting the she needs. I know when my DS was that age, I didn't know any little kids with autism, so I never would have seen the signs myself. I am glad someone had that conversation with me, even though it was hard to hear.

Message edited 9/27/2013 11:55:41 AM.

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Update

Mom was told she is showing signs of autism and to be evaluated. She got very upset with her daughters therapist at the recommendation and refused to get her tested at this point. I agree the challenge is the age right now. Just sad watching her go through this I know it's painful.

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

that is such a sad update. Do you have any influence on the mom at all? Using your own experiences and how important getting services early is?

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Hopefully she will come around very soon.

Denial is powerful, sadly............

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

Re: ASD what are the chances given these symptoms...

She wants to give it 6 months to a year. Her ped is telling her to wait it out and her parents are telling her she's fine. She told me she researched the aba therapy (if autism is the diagnosis) and thinks her daughter doesn't need it. She says her daughter is able to point to certain objects she knows in a book, will giggle on a swing and be tickled and if told to take a bath she goes to the bathroom door. So she thinks her child doesn't have a major language problem. She can also do a shape sorter and puzzle and identify some letters. So this is what's keeping her from getting her evaluated and wanting to give her more time. She also is tring to teach her to clap instead of flapping do its less noriceable as a red flag. I'm not a teacher or evaluator so I didn't respond to this but I know there are other major factors that can outweigh the good that she's doing like the ones Ientioned above. I think her response is common it was the one I had but I overcame it in 4 days and wanted the additional eval. I know she will give me updates and I'm going to listen for now and answer any question she asks.