Bachelorette party situation

Has anyone been in a bachelorette party situation where you were doing most of the spending and a lot of the attendees were not really pitching in? I have a friend getting married soon, who was upset because her bridesmaids dropped the ball in planning a bachelorette party for her ... I felt for her after I learned how upset she was and wanted to plan something for her, and a mutual friend of hers wanted to do something too so we started planning something together but I have spent a lot of money so far in decorations and other things, this friend just asked me to pick up more things, but I'm not sure how to tactfully say to ask one of the other friends she invited to contribute as well? We have a late lunch planned and then going for drinks after, but not sure if I should expect the other girls to pick up some of the costs either at lunch or when we go for drinks?

Re: Bachelorette party situation

I don't know that's tough. Maybe just say "hey maybe we could ask so and so to take care of that?" And I would definitely expect everyone to cover the costs of lunch and drinks that day. You should not have to pay for everyone.

Bachelorette party situation

I would send a group text or email saying something like: "Sally and I have started the planning for Jane's bachelorette party. So far, we've gotten decorations, X, Y, and Z. We could use someone to get A, B, and C. Also, we're going to ABC restaurant for lunch and drinks. I'm estimating the cost to be $XX per person, depending on what everyone orders. Hope to see you there!"

But, I have a question. If you're going out to eat, what do you need to buy? Are you bringing decorations to the restaurant? There really shouldn't be any extra expenses besides food/drinks, IMO.

Re: Bachelorette party situation

Thanks to you both for the responses! The problem is I am only friends w/ one other girl attending, the other girl organizing it with me, is friends w/ the other girls so I don't have their contact info..... I will mention something to her about having one of the other girls coming picking stuff up.

Apparently she booked a private room for the lunch and so she wants to decorate.

Bachelorette party situation

If they dropped the ball in planning I think it’s unlikely they will contribute now, especially if there was never an expectation set in terms of contributing.

If it’s just a matter of decorations, I’d probably suck it up. If there is anything else left to buy you could probably tap the mutual friend who you’re planning with.

Bachelorette party situation

What great friends. Thats why i only had three people in my wedding party because true colors tend to come out during weddings.

I would text/call the friend who knows the others and create a group chat concerning the party. I will tell them plainly that it would be nice if everyone can contribute towards the bachelorette party. Explain that you have bought most of the decorations but the remaining cost will be XYZ per person.

Bachelorette party situation

Yes. My sisters. I had to coordinate around everyone else's schedule. They were throwing around all these ideas and when it came down to it they expected me to pay. They flipped when I gave them the per person cost. So in the end I ended up cutting some stuff out.