I am so sorry to hear of what of what yoou going through. Please remember that (in the long run) only you can make you truly happy. Sometimes you have to do what is going to make you happy long term then what is going to make you happy today.
I know that we dont know each other but i had to end an engagement a few months ago (for trust issues and for the 2nd time in my life) so i can relate to what you might feel. if you every need someone, i am here.
I am so sorry to hear this! I am sure you are doing the right thing...no sense in staying in a relationship where there is no trust. Good for you for being brave and strong!
what my friends and i used to call the "Strong Woman Poem'.... After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul and you learn love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't always mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't always promises and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and and your eyes ahead with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child. And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong and you really do have worth and you learn and you learn with every good-bye you learn.