Can I ask a question?

My coworker is preggo with her first. She is due 2/17. She's had a rough pregnancy, lots of back pain, dehydration, etc.

Last week she ended up in the ER because of dehydration. She's experiencing contractions, carrying very low...the DRs say she won't make it full term and will likely deliver early. But basically, there's nothing else to do. If I were told I could deliver early, being the nutso I am, I'd be scared to even MOVE for fear of like breaking my water or something, ya know?

My question...How do you keep from going crazy? How do you keep from worrying that something could happen? I am not being insensitive, I've never been pregnant, but I told her if it were me I'd want to know everything going on, whats happening, what could happen. Is that going to make you crazy? Do you just let it ride? She's not in any immediate danger, but there are situations that are worse than this that people have been in. Maybe I'm just such a nerous Nellie...

Re: Can I ask a question?

I am almost 16 weeks. For the first 14 weeks I was ridiculous. A nervous wreck. Convinced everything that could go wrong would go wrong. I cried all the time and was so worked up before each doctor appointment that I could barely make it to the office.

Then I decided to let go of it as best I could. I still worry about things, but not like I used to. I realized that I have no control over what's going to happen or what's going on inside me. I just try to have faith that everything will be ok.

Re: Can I ask a question?

I think part of it is that everyone reacts to stress differently. Extra stress isn't going to help the PG and could do harm. I'm sure I would be nervous if the DR told me she didn't expect me to go full term but I would really try to not let it consume me. I would do all I could to take care of things within my control, like drinking a lot of fluids, but I'd try not to focus on the things that are beyond my control.

More than likely since your friends DR feels this way she will be closely monitored so they can check and see how she is progressing. Being under the watchful eye of a DR I trust would also help to keep me more at ease.

Message edited 11/14/2008 1:00:14 PM.

Re: Can I ask a question?

With my pregnancy, I just roll with with the punches, with a few lapses into Nervous Nelly-dom.

Normally, I am a total worrier. But, I guess with pregnancy, there are things within your control and others that are not.

You just have to do the best to take care of yourself, and hope that your docs will do the rest to make sure you and baby stay healthy. You can't make yourself crazy over every little detail, otherwise you will totally stress yourself out.

Re: Can I ask a question?

I was like this in the beginning. The truth is some of it you get used to and the worry eases and some of it you don't get used to and you worry alot.

I worry alot about a few things, but other things luckily I have developed a comfort level with.

I am a worrier by nature and how I deal is researching, chatting on here, freaking out sometimes, etc. But it hasn't been as bad as I would have imagined, then again I have had a fairly easy pg.

Some of it you just learn to say whatever happens happens...it takes time to feel that way.

Re: Can I ask a question?

"...but I told her if it were me I'd want to know everything going on, whats happening, what could happen. Is that going to make you crazy?"

It depends on the person. Although things do freak me out, it freaks me out more to not know what is going on in my body. I do prefer to know certain things, and I like my Dr. to be upfront and frank about it. I am not a fan of sugar-coating something just to make me feel better.

But everyone is different of course.

And going early does not necessarily mean pre-term labor either. I know people who were told by their Drs that they would go early & they ended up being induced at 41 weeks (which is late). So there are really no guarantees.

Re: Can I ask a question?

Everyone deals with things differently -
Things that would send others into hysteria I just shrug off .........

My theory is WHY waste your time worrying until there's actually something to worry about?

I'm sure if I were in her position I'd be nervous and concerned. - But all you can really do is what the Dr(s) tell you to do and pray for the best - Unfortunately, I've learned you don't have control over too much when it comes to being pregnant !!

Re: Can I ask a question?

Thanks ladies!

I am more curious than anything. But truthfully, I guess there's only so much you can worry about...women have been having babies for centuries. Pregnancy should a happy time, and you can't spend all your time worrying. There's only so many books you can read, websites to research; The DRs will do everything in their power to help. I just look at her growing belly and am amazed that a human being is in there. It's such a wonderful thing to experience but if things are out of your control, you have to be OK with that (IE, not worrying, stressing over nothing).

Congrats on becoming mommies

Re: Can I ask a question?

I am in my 33rd week and was put on bed rest on Tuesday
I am carrying VERY low; no contractions but I am 80%

I do worry in terms of my water breaking but I just follow the dr's orders and dont do anything Im not supposed to