CIO - Longest time for crying?

This is our night 1 for CIO - our son is 5 months old. He's now been crying for over an hour - we have been checking on him at 10 min intervals like the Ferber book suggests.

How long is the longest the CIO moms have let the babies cry? It's brutal to go even this long as you guys know.

Just wanted to check with the BTDT moms to see if I should maybe try this again in a few weeks if he's still crying after 90 min today. Maybe he's not ready for it yet...?

TIA!

ETA: UPDATE: Thank you all for your advice and support. He woke up at 1:50am and cried for over 30 min so we decided not to do CIO until maybe next month when he is 6 months old.
We had wanted to start when he was 5 months old because he already exhibited signs of knowing that we would come to get him when he made the slightest sound. When we picked him up at 2:30am this morning because of his crying, he stopped crying instantaneously and started smiling. My DH and I were joking that DS was probably thinking " I WON!"

We also would like to ask our ped on whether there is a recommended max limit of how much you can let the baby cry. This was torture on us of course! Wish it had worked so that we didn't have to re-do.

Message edited 4/26/2008 12:04:59 PM.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

I found that "checking in" made things 10 times worse for us.

It just wound him up all over again.

So we just let him cry straight through.

25 minutes one night, 15 the next, 10 the next, then eventually he didn't cry at all.



ETA: my son was a couple months older when we tried it though, I'm not sure if that makes a difference or not.

Message edited 4/25/2008 10:38:25 PM.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

Hmmm, I've never done CIO on a baby that young, when my daughter was 8 months old, she cried for like 25 minutes the first night and like 5 the next night and that was it. I agree with not going in at all beacuse it makes it worse.
Normally, my advice is not to pick up your child because then that crying was all for nothing, but I feel like 5 months old is way too young for a baby to understand cause and effect.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

DS is 19 months and last night was the longest at 20 minutes. It was absolutely heartbreaking. He was so overtired that he got himself worked up. I knew going in there would only make it worse. It really killed me but I had to do it for his (and my) own good.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

DD is 6 months and we started the beginning of this month. We let her cry as long as it took. We however did no go in and check on her because we knew it would only make the situation worse.

She actually went for over 2 hours one night.

Hang in there!!

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

We didn't do CIO. Especially at that age. Ferber retracted his origional view on CIO. It's been proven to produced highly sensitive and over-emotional beings later in life.

Not knockin you, I just couldn't imagine letting my baby cry fro over an hour at 5 months old!

My advice is to listen to his/her cries. We distinguished what was whining "I can't sleep/I don't want to sleep" whims from actual crying because i'm upset and need comfort.

Aidan is 2 now and not at all clingy or spoiled and goes to bed pretty well for a toddler in the terrible two stage. At most when I put him to bed and he doesn't want to sleep, he'll play for a few minutes in the dark and then go to sleep when he's ready. But if he cries I ALWAYS go in there, tell him he's fine and it's time for bed.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

My dd is 5 1/2 months old, and we never let her cry longer than 10-15 minutes. Honestly, I think your DC is probably too young for this method. My pediatrician was adamant about not doing this until 9-10 months.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

I just started CIO at 5 months (nightime and naps) and so far I let her cry for 30 minutes for a nap and she slept for over an hour! this is a child that doesn't sleep more than 20 minutes usually...
Now she falls asleep within 10 minutes of putting her in the crib...

At night she always falls asleep while nursing and sleeps thru but the other night she woke up and I let her cry...after 13 minutes she was asleep, I wouldn't have let her go over an hour.

Maybe you should try again in a few weeks

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

I had to re-do CIO this week since my son has been waking every night at 2:30. We did it Thursday night - he cried for 45 mins. Last night - he didn't wake at all. We'll see what tonight brings!

Oh - and we do not go in there - it makes him so much worse!

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

I did CIO with my DS when he was 8 months old, I did go in to him. All I did was lay him back down, pat him on the back for a second and leave. I went in as often or as little as I needed to. Sometimes he was just complaining so I would stay out, other times he was hysterical and it broke my heart to listen to. This worked for my DS, but they do say a lot of kids just get more worked up if a parent goes in. I guess you have to try and see what works best for you and your child. Its also good if you have your partners support, you can talk each other out of going in and remind each other why you are doing it. I on the other hand waited until my DH was going on a business trip b/c I knew he could not handle it.

Oh, the first night was about 30 min, then 20, then 3 then nothing. Every once and a while my DS tries to lure me back in, even 12 mos later. I will find myself going to rock him and then have to check myself

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

Thank you all for your advice and support. He woke up at 1:50am and cried for over 30 min so we decided not to do CIO until maybe next month when he is 6 months old.
We had wanted to start when he was 5 months old because he already exhibited signs of knowing that we would come to get him when he made the slightest sound. When we picked him up at 2:30am this morning because of his crying, he stopped crying instantaneously and started smiling. My DH and I were joking that DS was probably thinking " I WON!"

We also would like to ask our ped on whether there is a recommended max limit of how much you can let the baby cry. This was torture on us of course! Wish it had worked so that we didn't have to re-do.

Re: CIO - Longest time for crying?

We didn't do the Ferber version, but did let DD CIO for 2 hours once. After that it gradually got less and less over the course of a week. Now she sleeps straight from 7pm-5:30am.

She was 9 months old when we did it though.