Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I'm not sure if I should send one or not. Do you think it's ok? I want to send it to a woman who had just lost her husband.

Message edited 11/23/2009 10:43:08 AM.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

of course... life has to move on...

I don't think someone dealing with bereavement would want to be treated with obvious caution... KWIM?

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

My Dad died in October and people still sent my mom cards. But I don't think she sent out cards that year.

ETA: I don't think it would be appropriate for people to write "Have a great Christmas" Or "Hope you have a wonderful Holiday" But a nice, "thinking of you this Christmas, I know it will be hard" is a very nice gesture.

Message edited 11/23/2009 10:44:33 AM.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I just wanted to add it's the woman's husband.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I think it would be worse not to.

Although they are suffering a loss, life goes on, I would hate to think someone wouldn't send me a holiday card bc I lost a loved one

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I would send one.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Absolutely send one. Just be sensitive in what you write. I think it's more important than ever to let people who've lost a loved one know that they're being thought of and remembered.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Emily Post etiquette says no. The older people in my family stick to that and didn't send to a family friend who lost her sister last year and I know they won't send to my ILs this year since we lost DH's grandmother this month.

I still do, I figure it might bring a little happiness to them.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

My Grandmother dies last November and I still received and sent holiday cards. The holidays were extremely tough for me last year, but the cards really did bring some joy into my life when things were so down. So I would definitely send a card. You can always add a message along the lines of "thinking of you during the holiday season".

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Lost my husband in August.

I would be sadder if I DIDN'T get cards.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

i say yes... let them know you're thinking of them. however, i think it is probably safe to assume that they will not reciprocate this year.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I'm not sure where the tradition came from, but when someone passes in the current year, my family always sends a religous holiday card to the family for the holidays.

My grandmother told me once, when I asked why the religois cards and she simply said..."you want to let your loved ones know that you are thinking of them and that they are in your prayers, the holidays are a difficult time when you lose someone that you love; and its nice to know that the people you care about are thinking about you and keeping you in their hearts"

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I would send a note saying I am thinking of them. If my card had a photo of my child, I would also send that b/c I have found that people who have had losses are the ones who really appreciate seeing the next generation.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

When my grandfather passed away last October, my mom still got holiday cards. She hoped that everyone understood why she didn't send any back. I think she appreciated the cards.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

If I were the one sending the card to this woman, I would pick out an individual holiday card at the Hallmark store and hand write a message that said something like, "I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you this holiday season. I hope you are doing well, " something personal so she knows you actually gave it some thought. I think she would be touched.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I think so, it let's them know that you are thinking of them. I remember when my mom died, I was glad that people had sent cards because the cards help me to focus on good memories.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I lost my mom late last November. I agree with the majority of the other posters; I would have been sadder if I didn't get cards. Part of the trauma you go through when mourning is that some people don't know what to say to you so they don't say anything and ignore you... can't blame them, it's a tough situation, but it made me feel even lonelier. So all the love and support someone can give at the time was appreciated, even in the form of a holiday card.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

as someone who lost her husband i say yes. it lets you know who is truly going to be there in the middle of the night. Can you understand?

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

I would send a card and let that person know that you are thinking of them during this time. I think it would be worse not to get any cards.

Re: Do you think it's appropriate to send someone a holiday greeting card when there was a death in the family in October?

Yes! There is absolutely no reason NOT to!