Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I know some people choose not to breast feed and that's their perogative but those of you who are breastfeeding cherish it.
I am having horrible problems with breast feeding. My milk never really came in for some reason. I had colostrum and it switched to milk but I never got "engorged". I didn't realize this and it lead to the whole blood episode with Miranda.
Now after seeing a lactation consultant twice and Miranda being underweight we're supplementing with formula and to me it really feels like more than supplementing. My breast milk is really the supplement to the formula.
I have to pump a minimum of 8 times a day for 20 min at time and when I pump the most I get is 1/2 ounce from wach breast. It's so disheartening to me. There was nothing I wanted to do more than breastfeed my daughter. I hate giving her a bottle. It feels so detached compared to breast feeding.
I usually let her latch on each breast for 10 min or so but she's getting frustrated with that because now she realizes the bottle is where the food is at. I also have a boob contraption that runs a thin tube from a bottle and you tape it to you and when she latches you latch her with the end of the tube at the nipple so she's sort of breast feeding but even that doesn't feel "right" to me.
I am trying so hard to stay positive but with all these hormones it's not that easy. Not to mention by the time I breast feed, then bottle feed, get her down and pump its time to start all over again so no time for naps. Now add the whole spitting up thing and its really all quite overwhelming.
The lactation consultant told me I need to give it 4-6 weeks. That the key is pump, pump, pump. She thinks I don't have a normal amount of mammory glands which is why I am not producing enough milk but we're hoping to trick the ones I have by power pumping and feeding. We'll see what happens.
I know this post was kind of all over the place but I just needed to get it all out. Today was an overwhelming day for me. Thanks for listening.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I am so sorry that things are not the way you hoped they would be. I wish you the best of luck. I give you a huge amount of credit working this hard to make a go of it. I here the contraption (that's the supplemental feeding system thing right?) works cause the baby is stimulating your nipples which is so much more powerful than the pump. Plus baby is getting reinforced for going to breast.

Sorry I don't know much. Just wanted to say we are all here for you. Please keep us posted on your progress.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I know bf is a really emotional and important decision to you, but def don't let it interfere with your ability to make a good decision for your daughter's sake.
I had a similar problem- I had to be flexible and give up bf quickly when I heard her cries of hunger after bf. She was STARVING as my milk really did not come in properly. It was sad for me on one level at first, but then made me SO happy when we switched to formula because she enjoyed eating and I was so elated to see her satisfied.
I also found other ways to bond with her. I turn out the lights everynight, putting on some soothing music, feeding her that last warm bottle and rocking her to sleep. I try not to talk so much to her at night- we just look at each other and I softly tell her how much I love her, how happy I am that she is alive, etc... I feel like that quality of bonding is the most important. YOu can definitely come up with an important way of bonding that is meaningful to you.
I hope it works out for you,
but don't beat your head against a wall if it doesn't. You are only human after all. This happens to so many women.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

So sorry to hear about all the troubles you are having.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I am so sorry you are going through this. I think you are a wonderful mommy for trying so hard, a lot of women would have given up by now. Having a new baby at home is such a big adjustment in itself, adding the pressures of this must be overwhelming. Just take one day at a time and hopefully you can trick those glands and if not then you know you did all you could.

Message edited 10/8/2005 7:45:13 AM.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Im soo sorry and I have to say that I kinda know how you feel, I am going thru a similar situation right now and its really hard. I am trying to stick it out with the bf too it is very important to me as well. Im on a crazy diet of no milk, eggs or nuts and its really hard. I also think my supply went down too plus Bryan is such a little peanut because he is a slow gainer and he started off so huge at birth which makes me feel horrible sometimes like Im starving him, Im too working on getting my supply back up as well.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Thank you everyone for your kind words. It really helped to just get how I was feeling out.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I give all the women who breastfeed a TON of credit. It is SO NOT EASY. You would think it's something that's simple because it's natural but it really requires a great deal of effort, consistency and discipline.

I'm sorry you are having a harder time than most but I admire your determination to keep giving your daughter the best possible food.

Keep up the good work!!

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Posted by BabyAvocado

I give all the women who breastfeed a TON of credit. It is SO NOT EASY. You would think it's something that's simple because it's natural but it really requires a great deal of effort, consistency and discipline.

I'm sorry you are having a harder time than most but I admire your determination to keep giving your daughter the best possible food.

Keep up the good work!!

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

you rule for trying so hard.....please keep us posted. I had to pump my heart out in the beginning, I would pump for 20 minutes, and get literally 5cc of milk, I had to feed it to her with a syringe. then I just started making milk after about 7 days. I went to a lactaion consultant once. I hope things turn around for you. If not, just keep in mind that any amount of breast milk she has gotten from you is so much better than none at all!

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

awee, whether you bf for one day or one year its still good for them. I had a hard time too and after a few bouts w/ mastitis and Sami not gaining weight I gave up. I Considered calling a LC and b/c I was going back to work soon I did not. THe engorgment and infections were killers. I think if I was a FT SAHM I would have tried to hang in there more but sometimes it is just hard and does not work out and you should be proud of yourself for doing it as long as you could or can

I think it is great you are trying to keep it up and pump, etc... good for you!

Message edited 10/9/2005 12:07:29 AM.

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I hope the LC can help!

Re: Don't take Breastfeeding for Granted

I admire your determination...Good Luck