For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

This really got me choked up. It is called "loving two"

enjoy

I walk along holding your 2-year-old hand, basking in the glow of our magical relationship.
Suddenly I feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that our time alone is limited.
And I wonder, how could I love another child as I love you?

Then she is born, and I watch you.
I watch as the pain you feel at having to share me as you have never shared me before.

I hear you telling me in your own way, "Please love only me" and I hear myself telling you in mine "I can't".
Knowing in fact that I never can again.
You cry, I cry with you.
I almost see our baby as an intruder on the precious relationship we once shared.
A relationship we can never have again.

But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being, and feeling almost guilty.
I'm afraid to let you see me enjoying her -- as though I am betraying you.
But then I notice your resentment change, first to curiosity, then to protectiveness, finally to genuine affection.

More days pass, and we are settling into a new routine.
The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast.
But something is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just us two.
There are new times -- only now we are three.
I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch each other.

I watch how she adores you, as I have for so long.
I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.
I begin to realize that I haven't taken something from you, I've given something to you.
I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of you.
I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are, but equally strong.
And my question is finally answered to my amazement.
Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you, only differently.

And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I know you'll never share my love.
There's enough of that for both of you -- you each have your own supply.

I love you both and I thank you both for blessing my life.

---Author Unknown

Message edited 7/12/2010 8:50:14 AM.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Thank you for this

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

I am hysterical reading this knowing that my special time with my little man will be so different come January.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Thank you so much for posting this.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Posted by pinkandblue

Posted by MrsFlatbread

I am hysterical reading this knowing that my special time with my little man will be so different come January.

it will definitely be different, but that is not necessarily a bad thing. watching my kids interact just warms my heart.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

It's so true... Luca adores his little sister and I love him even more now, if that's possible, plus I love Izzie with all my heart as well. It's insane how much your heart can grow

ETA: I was also lucky in that Luca never showed any jealousy at all towards Izzie, so that made the transition easier (in that aspect) so not every kid will resent their new little sibling.

Message edited 7/12/2010 9:24:52 AM.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Posted by headoverheels

:

ETA: I was also lucky in that Luca never showed any jealousy at all towards Izzie, so that made the transition easier (in that aspect) so not every kid will resent their new little sibling.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

That is sooooo touching.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

ok, now I'm bawling. I struggle with this when I look at DS, he'll be almost 2 when #2 arrives and I'm already having nightmares of when he needs me and I can't, because I'm dealing with #2 who needs me maybe just a bit more. Ugh, it's going to break my heart especially since he won't understand and I don't know how I'm going to be able to separate myself from DS either. Since I've been a SAHM since he's been born it's like we're a little couple, a little team...he's my world.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

I love that! I read it once before and wanted to copy it andd never did.

I remember sitting with DS while I was pregnant with the twins and crying because I didn't think I could possibly love the new babies the same way i did my son. And I was sooooo worried for him and how his little life was going to change. But it is truly amazing how your heart can love all 3 kids. My love for each of them is different, but so amazingly overwhelming.

And my son adjusted to being a big brother to twins so wonderfully. He is amazing with them and he melts my heart.
(now that they are crawling near his stuff he is not as thrilled! )

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

You just made this preggo cry.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

*sniff, sniff*

Now that my nose is running and my eyes are watering...

This was beautiful, thanks for sharing!

I have to say, I am at my happiest when I see my DS go over to DD and say "hello pretty girl" in the cutest voice ever. And then he touches her face and tries to put his arm around her head to hug her.

Then I see the look of absolute delight on my DD face. She has a special smile that is reserved just for her big brother. A smile so wide that it takes up her entire face and lights up her eyes. And I know that they have a connection, and I know that they realize that connection, and I instantly see it when they look at each other.

And I also know there will come a time when they are at each other's throat, but that is OK.

For now, I am just enjoying their relationship the way it is today. And I love them both so much it hurts!

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Someone had emailed me that poem when I was preggo with DD. It really helped me because I was terrified about that exact thing. It is so true and beautiful.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

This is my biggest fear, I'm not pg with #2 yet but I really tear up when I look at DD and think she's not going to get all my attention anymore...it makes me want to cry..thanks for posting this!!

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

I only got through the first few lines. I remember thinking those exact thoughts. I'll have to try reading it again later.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

not/was never my situation at all so I couldn't relate but it was a great poem for the mommies who have a toddler and expecting.

Message edited 7/12/2010 11:36:22 AM.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

Thanks for posting this as I'm currently struggling with this very issue, trying to decide when to TTC #2.

Re: For all the mommies who wonder "will I have enough love for more than 1 child"

I saw this last year, and now that I am pregnant with #2 it hits home big time. I cried again reading it, because I know that I can and will love my next child just as much as Ashley, it will just be different between her and I. The baby just started moving around to the point that I can feel it, and it makes me so happy but it is bittersweet because our time just the two of us is so short. Please don't take it like I am not excited, I feel so blessed, there are just a range of emotions going on.