Have to look into daycare............

So, my MIL has been watching the boys...well my MIL and FIL. She INSISTED that she watch them because she didnt want "strangers" to watch them. She only watches them till about 2pm which is when I get out and pick them up at 2:20 everyday.
Well, this week I have noticed she has thrown some nasty comments to me when I pick them up at her house.
Today, I asked if his FIL can drop them off at the house because our truck (with the car bases ) was being inspected and wasnt ready yet, and he was fine with it, and didnt get to my house till 4pm.
Today was the last straw. Jay called there house and his dad put his mom on the phone and she told Jay off (Jay is still upset by this).
She said ....you have to pick them up no later than 3 pm..Im 60 years old and Im TIRED...your father left me alone with 2 crying babies, and YOU (meaning Jay) dont care about your sons.....
So, I told Jay that was it...I will look into Tutor Time during my prep time tomorrow. i cant belieev she said that Jay didnt care

How will we ever afford to send 2 kids to day care

Message edited 12/21/2006 8:58:55 PM.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I know it is hard. But I guess it will be better in the long run. This way there is no hard feelings between family. Hang in there.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

sorry you have to look into daycare. It isn't right what she said, but maybe she was just frustrated (not that it's an excuse.) Maybe it's better you look into daycare, because if they are wearing her out now, imagine when they start running around!! Why is she being nasty to you when you pick them up??

Re: Have to look into daycare............

It will be better in the long run. You have to accept alot when family is doing child care.

Tutor Time is expensive though, you may be better off trying to find someone to come to your house.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

anyone know of any good places??
I live in Coram

Re: Have to look into daycare............

That was very mean and I feel bad for your DH. I dont know if you would consider this but, what if you only put one into daycare and left one with your MIL. She might be very overwhelmed with 2 infants so young.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Sorry to hear this. My mom watched DD 5 days the first year and it was difficult. With 2 you may be better off w/ either a live-in or a baby sitter that comes to the house.
I'm sure MIL has good intentions but it must be incredibly difficult for her to take care of two babies. Maybe you can do "daycare" 2-3 days a week and MIL can watch the babies on the other days.

Good luck

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I am so sorry you are going through this. I hope you find a safe and affordable daycare...

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I'm sorry Diane, that stinks! Maybe you can do it part time there and part time with your inlaws or do you not even want to be bothered with them at all? Can your DH work flexible hours???

Re: Have to look into daycare............

so sorry to hear, its rough with family members i know. Good luck in your search. Hang in there.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

She is probably just overwhelmed an lashed out. We have all been there with one baby crying ALL day, let alone two. What if she watched them two days a week and you did day care for three? This way, it would be less expensive and she would still get to see her grandsons. Just a thought.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I'm so sorry Good Luck

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Sorry you have to go through this. I know the feeling of looking /having my child in daycare. If you have Flexible Spending through your job, you can take out the money pretax. It really helps in the long run ( I think 5,000 is the max ?)

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Family is so tricky.
Are you close enough with MIL that you can talk to her about the arrangement and see what's bothering her? Maybe you can work something out so she doesn't feel so overwhelmed.
What about in home daycare? Aren't they usually a bit cheaper?
I hope something works out for you.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I'm sure it will work out whatever happens

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I'm sorry you are going through this. i

Re: Have to look into daycare............

If you would prefer them staying with her, maybe you could hire a helper to go and help her out for a few hours a day so she isn't so overwhelmed.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I know someone that will take part time if you want to go that route, so your Mil won't have to do every day. PM me if you want her info, she is in Holtsville right off the expressway.

Re: Have to look into daycare............

FM

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Talk to her about possibly just doing two days....say you realize she is older and it is hard with two little babies and you wanted to offer her some relief 3 days out of the week. That way it will be less $$$

Re: Have to look into daycare............

Oh Diane - I am sorry you are going through this.

PLEASE let me know if there is something I can do to help

Re: Have to look into daycare............

I agree - it sounds like she's overwhelmed, so while lashing out isn't appropriate, I can kind of understand why it happened. There are a slew of alternatives though - maybe have someone come to your home? Maybe hire a high school helper to help your MIL? Maybe do daycare part-time? All of which I think you should discuss with your MIL and see what she's most comfortable with... good luck

Re: Have to look into daycare............

i have no suggestions, just wanted to tell you i am so sorry