Have your parents changed as they get older?

my Dad especially has changed SO MUCH since he turned 60. every year it seems like he gets more mellow and nicer!

I remember growing up he was always a grouch. never mushy, never talkative.

and now, he doesn't shut his mouth when DH and I go for a visit, he talks non stop no only that, but he hugs and kisses me every time I see him, something he rarely used to do. and lately, he's even CALLED me

I don't know how to handle it

but I have to say, I love it! and I love my Daddy

Message edited 9/20/2008 9:21:50 AM.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

Aww, I agree, my father has become more mellow. He's actually a downright mush now! My Mom, she's about the same, though she is a little more aloof now.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

mom gets more stubborn and forgetful every year It's awful, becuase she will quickly become argumentative about something really straight forward and will take the overtly wrong side.

(ex. the new phone is 'cheaper' than the old phone becuase the old phone was 900 mhz and the new one is only DECT 6 (or 1.9ghz) Obviously the new one is much better technology than an 8 year old phone, but she insists the old one is better and is more 'solid'.)

since I'm now pregnant, she keeps saying she had 'no symptoms' (swelling, food aversions aches, constipation...) during her entire pregnancy, and had no braxton hicks during her 3rd trimester. she felt great all the time. why can't I trust that blisful memory of hers?

there are no responses to these arguments, obviously.

it's fine. we love her anyway and just turn a blind eye.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

My mom has never changed. She still the same sweet, soft-spoken bubblehead she's always been, lol.

My dad on the other hand was grumpy, mean, abrasive and uninterested in anything that I had to say (if it wasn't about school). Now he's nice, he actually smiles and will BS with me. My sister and I have noticed that with every grandchild born he gets nicer.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

my mom has gotten a lot calmer but can still go from zero to a hundred in 2.4 seconds given the right circumstances hahaha.

my dad is the same - easy going.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

my dad is a little softer around the edges.

my mom: since she and my dad split up, well, she thinks she should live the youth she didn't the first time around she's stopped being a mom to me and a grandmother to ds because she's so busy being young and hip.

one of the many reasons i'm in therapy. i'm having to deal with the new mom she's become.

Re:

Message edited 3/20/2010 11:13:00 AM.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

My dad has become calmer and has more of "it is what it is" attitude about things. Although he likes to be alone more often than not, even moreso than before.

My mom has actually changed a lot since losing her boyfriend years ago. Then when my gram passed last October, she totally changed. She is always sad, depressed and just not who she used to be. It breaks my heart.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

My dad never really changed. He was always awesome, funny and smart. Everyone always loved my dad - and at his funeral it showed.

MY MOM used to be the grouchiest woman EVER. People always thought she was wonderful - and she was - BUT she was also nit-picky, particular, a little vain and a lot controlling where it came to her family. She mellowed as she got older and totally changed after my dad died. When my dad was alive he was the center of her universe - everything she did was for him an about him. After he was gone she became much less invested in appearances and devoted herself to her kids and grandkids. I always loved her as a mother - but for the 5 years she survived my dad I also got to know her as the woman and the friend that other people had always admired.

Message edited 9/20/2008 5:23:13 PM.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

My dad has become more mellow and my mother has become more neurotic and dramatic

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

They're a lot crankier than I remember. My parents complain about EVERYTHING. And they're only in their late 40's, so I can't blame the fact that they're "older."

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

Personality-wise my parents are pretty much the same.

My father has always been talkative, happy-go-lucky, friendly, and involved in his kids' and grandkids' lives. My mother has always been a Gemini . I kid, I kid. My mom has always been nice, talkative, friendly, and involved in her kids and grandkids' lives. Honestly, I've had my complaints over the years about my parents and probably still have some -- but I'm SO lucky. I have really great parents.

If anything, I'd say my mom has mellowed a little bit and become less of a perfectionist, I guess. But she's still the same mom. I'd also say she's maybe gotten a bit more "liberal" in her ideas.

I find it very hard to watch my parents get older. They are only in their mid-60s now, but I am sad to watch them get older. After my mom's breast cancer and dad's heart surgery, I guess I just worry about them too much. I am lucky they are healthy today and grateful to still have them around.

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

My parents complain more. My mom complains about politics, health, weather, car problems, you name it. But she is good-hearted and very loving towards me...shes the best, just a worry wart.

My Dad doesn't listen anymore. He'll ask me a question and talk over me before I even finish my story. Its sad really. He is good-hearted also but just thinks he knows all. He likes to give me advice on my marraige and he's been divorced 2x and married 3x

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

DEFINITELY!!

When I was growing up my parents were so strict, I would say that if they were raising kids in 2008 someone would have called CPS. I mean seriously they had a broom handle without the broom part behind the fridge for when we were bad. We were not allowed to close the door to our bedrooms ever - we had to change our clothes in the bathroom bc of this. We used to have to stand in front of them and say our prayers out loud every night before bed. Really crazy stuff. NOW?! They are so nice and laid back!! Their grandchildren jump on their Italian couches that we werent allowed to even sit on! My mom makes the kids different meals when they dont want to eat, the same mother that used to make me sit in front of COLD meals for HOURS at a time while I sobbed!

LOL i had a great childhood dont get me wrong but damn, i wish they were this sweet when I was growing up!!!

Re: Have your parents changed as they get older?

Definitely. My parents have always been great, but when I was growing up were strict with me, esp. with school. (but hey it got me to where I am today and I completed grad. school )
The last couple years my dad who has always been a softee (he'll try to act like he isn't and be tough but lol he so is far from tough)is now even more of a mush. Everytime I talk to him he always always tells me how much he loves me and asks if I'm ok and if I need anything.

My mom has always been one to worry, and sometimes I still think she is, but has somewhat gotten better.

They used to always be very over protective, still are in some ways, but definitely have learned to give my sister and I space over the years to live and learn.
My mom has always been the type where you come to her, and not be the one to call me or visit me, I was coming to her. For awhile I was the one always calling. One day I didn't and then the next day she called and asked why didnt you call yesterday and I said "well why didnt you call?" Since then she's def. gotten better about that and calls more often.
They were always big on giving advice and thinking they were always right (which 95% of the time they were) and sometimes I wish I had listened more to their advice along the way, but they let me make my own decisions
you live you learn you move forward, and don't look backwards only forward.


ETA: they have also become more forgetful as well.

Message edited 9/20/2008 9:47:54 PM.