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having a really bad couple of days! could use some advice THIS IS REALLY LONG!

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Meggo613
im a big girl!

Member since 2/07

4536 total posts

Name:
Megan

Re: having a really bad couple of days! could use some advice THIS IS REALLY LONG!

Posted by Annie91606

I would move- and I like the idea of renting first to see how you like it.

We moved OOS (to VA) for Dh's job earlier this year. I went from having to work FT to being able to be a SAHM. I love it. I have been here 4 months and have made some friends already.

Having a child can open up some doors for you to meet people, and you will still be close enought to LI to drive home for parties, family events, holidays, etc.

It has worked out well for us. I hope you two can make a decision that works well for your familyChat Icon



Anne thank you so mcuh for your reply! i do have to think about that i still will be close to home. maybe i should look into living in westchester its a bit closer to home and much closer for DH! im willing to compromise thats for sure! we want to do whats best for all of us!

Posted 9/14/09 12:02 AM
 
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twinkletoes807
Mommy's Girls! ♥

Member since 11/07

10116 total posts

Name:
Gabi

Re: having a really bad couple of days! could use some advice THIS IS REALLY LONG!

Posted by Meggo613

Thanks Gabi Chat Icon dh used to commute from suffolk to queens and didnt miind it. hes now commuting from suffolk to westchester and isnt complaining but it adds up and his work day is 10 hrs so i can only imagine how he feels!



It definitely takes a toll after a while. I've been commuting from East Islip to Astoria for the last 2 years and it takes me 50 minutes each way w/out traffic- I work at off times... Thank God! To me, quality of life is key, for both of you... so being a SAHM and getting my hubby home from work ASAP would be my top priorities! I would check out Westchester as an option, and even though things are pricey there too, the rental idea may work out for a while while DH feels out his job and decides if it is a forever fit for him. Here are some hugs that I forgot to send before... Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 9/14/09 12:09 AM
 

MRSE
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

1420 total posts

Name:
(112903)

Re: having a really bad couple of days! could use some advice THIS IS REALLY LONG!

Posted by headoverheels

i think if it were me i would reconsider the move to Orange County.

you would not know anyone at first,b ut you'd be able to make friends after enrolling your DD in a few classes and going to the library, etc.

your DH's commute would be less so he could see your DD more. and you would be able to afford a nicer place than you could get on LI.

as much as i love my family and friends, i did not allow proximity to influence where we decided to buy our first home. in the end we chose a town that is perfect for DS to grow up in, and we were able to afford a nice house in a great neighborhood for much less than if we stayed in Nassau County.

good luck, i know it's not an easy decision, just saying what i think i would want to do. Chat Icon



I have to agree with this... I signed DD up for class since she was 5months old and have made soo many new friends that we see each other all the time...

Posted 9/14/09 11:44 AM
 

Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!

Member since 8/05

14470 total posts

Name:
Veronica

Re: having a really bad couple of days! could use some advice THIS IS REALLY LONG!

I agree with making a list.

I moved back to TX and yes i do have family 'around' but really its just one aunt.

Jim knows no body.

We are alone. But my pro to this con was I was alone when I came to NY and I met people and friends.

Change is always scary but you have to realize you're not 'that' far and you can find new friends Chat Icon

I made my change for my daughter. yes, being home is great and all but i was more afraid of losing my job in NY and also I wasnt keen on raising her in the schools there (dont ask). But in making this change I had to uproot my husband, he had to leave his job, I had to hope he'd find a new one and the first year or so is going to be tight but in the end, its better for her and seeing her smile make my heart soar.

Altho i loved my old apt, AJ had no where to really explore and walk. Now even 3 months later I feel warmth in my soul when i see AJ crawl over to her own room and sit on the floor to play. She has space. She walks around, she is happy. For me, it was the selling point and the reason I struggle to make ends meet now. For her.

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I think you are in the right mind set, and no matter what your choice is its going to be a sacrifice of some type. But you're doing the right thing by thinking it through and taking your time to do what is right for your family. You'll be fine no matter what!

Posted 9/14/09 12:12 PM
 

Newly1
I love my baby boy!

Member since 6/08

2804 total posts

Name:
H

Re: having a really bad couple of days! could use some advice THIS IS REALLY LONG!

Posted by headoverheels

i think if it were me i would reconsider the move to Orange County.

you would not know anyone at first,b ut you'd be able to make friends after enrolling your DD in a few classes and going to the library, etc.

your DH's commute would be less so he could see your DD more. and you would be able to afford a nicer place than you could get on LI.

as much as i love my family and friends, i did not allow proximity to influence where we decided to buy our first home. in the end we chose a town that is perfect for DS to grow up in, and we were able to afford a nice house in a great neighborhood for much less than if we stayed in Nassau County.

good luck, i know it's not an easy decision, just saying what i think i would want to do. Chat Icon



coming from a hopefully soon Mom to be....I have to say I agree with this suggestion. DH and I considered moving further away to have a "better" life, and b/c of family being here we decided to stay. Now we are regretting it b/c inlaws might consider moving off the island, my parents are leaving, my siblings have all left within the past few months, and we don't have an overabundance of friends as it is.

On top of that....Unfortunately I am in a position similar to your DH and I have about a 1.5 hour commute to work everyday (i work in the North Bronx, close to westchester). I also work late frequently and sometimes on Sat. to try and make some extra money since living on LI is awfully expensive. I can't imagine what it will be like when we have a kid. I will most likely have to try and find a job closer to home, otherwise I will never get to spend enough time with my DC. DH and I just bought a home, although we had been living with my inlaws for a little while to save extra $. While I was 100% grateful to be able to save while living with them and they are really great people, it has not been easy living with my inlaws. There were times where it created some friction in our relationship, and becuase of that I would not recommend living above your parents forever. (Even though, I am sure since they are your parents it wouldnt bother you...it will prob at some point bother DH and possibly create problems). I know this is such a tough decision. You can always "try" moving up to westchester for a little while. If you really end up hating it you can always leave. (just hold out on buying something for now). You seem like a really friendly person and I am sure you will have no problem meeting people if you do take that step. Good luck to you!

Posted 9/14/09 1:04 PM
 
Pages: 1 [2]
 

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