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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
does anyone know if you're responsible for feeding home health aides when they live in 24 hours a day with you? my uncle is dying of cancer  and they just got a 24 hour home health aide. she's being very demanding--telling my great aunt (who's 85) she has to cook for her, buy her food and/or reimburse her for the food she has to buy.
to me this sounds weird because everyone has to eat so why is she responsible for buying/cooking her food? is she taking advantage of my elderly aunt?
anyone know?
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Posted 8/6/09 9:13 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
I don't have experience with 24 hr aides, we only used them for when I was at work. But I didn't have to supply anything.
I would call the agency and see what they say.
I'm sorry your aunt is dealing with this on top of everything else
ETS: If your aunt isn't comfortable with the way this aide is treating her she should let the agency know and maybe they can send someone new. She doesn't need the added stress.
Message edited 8/6/2009 9:35:11 PM.
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| Posted 8/6/09 9:20 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
My Mom had aides for over 2 years and she fed them. They always ate with us. They did not work for an agency though. It was through word of mouth.
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| Posted 8/6/09 9:33 PM |
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Definitely call the agency to find out. I work in home care, and I've found that depending on the "case" many times, different rules and policies and such apply. I *think* though and I am not 100% sure because I don't oversee 24-hour live-ins, that they are allowed to take a break for a certain amount of time and go out to get their OWN food and tend to basic needs and such like sleep.
I can say though that I overhear our staffing coordinators who oversee the live-in cases venting about the workers A LOT. 
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| Posted 8/6/09 9:33 PM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Posted by Goldi0218
My Mom had aides for over 2 years and she fed them. They always ate with us. They did not work for an agency though. It was through word of mouth.
it's not that my aunt is unwilling to let her eat with her, it's that this woman is saying she needs to cook specifically for HER!! my aunt wouldn't mind sharing a meal at all.
my family has already found a replacement who is starting in a few days. i told my other aunt to set "ground rules" and find out what this new lady expects BEFORE she starts so there are no problems. we don't know what we are responsible for because we've never done this before. my aunt, who is already stressed out because her husband has days/weeks to live, is now becoming more depressed over this aide situation. 
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| Posted 8/6/09 9:44 PM |
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steph7308
Mommy of 2!!!
Member since 5/08 2083 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Posted by browneyedgirl
it's not that my aunt is unwilling to let her eat with her, it's that this woman is saying she needs to cook specifically for HER!! my aunt wouldn't mind sharing a meal at all.
i dont have any experience but i can bet that your aunt dosnt have to cook specifically for her. its one thing for her to join her for dinner but to go out of her way to make her meals, no, that sounds crazy. who takes advantage of someone already going thru hell? 
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| Posted 8/6/09 11:47 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Posted by steph7308
Posted by browneyedgirl
it's not that my aunt is unwilling to let her eat with her, it's that this woman is saying she needs to cook specifically for HER!! my aunt wouldn't mind sharing a meal at all.
i dont have any experience but i can bet that your aunt dosnt have to cook specifically for her. its one thing for her to join her for dinner but to go out of her way to make her meals, no, that sounds crazy. who takes advantage of someone already going thru hell?
I agree. Even if she's getting a new person, I'd still call the agency. They should know the stress she's putting on customers.
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| Posted 8/7/09 5:57 AM |
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chrisnjoe8108
He's 1!
Member since 8/08 5649 total posts
Name:
Chris
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
I work as a social worker and my agency contracts with home health agencies. Generally it is the Live in aides responsibility to bring their own food or purchase their own food. I would contact the agency coordinator or nurse and ask them. If you need more help FM me.
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| Posted 8/7/09 8:02 AM |
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BigB
C & J are 10!
Member since 6/05 5914 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Posted by chrisnjoe8108
I work as a social worker and my agency contracts with home health agencies. Generally it is the Live in aides responsibility to bring their own food or purchase their own food. I would contact the agency coordinator or nurse and ask them. If you need more help FM me.
That is how is works with my grandmother's aide..............Nobody pays for you to eat at work do they?
BTW, I never like 24 hr care. When my dad was sick, we always did 12/12 instead of 24 because we found that the 24 hour people think they run the house! They get too comfortable and slack off. Now of course, tha isn't every aide, but it was our experience.
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| Posted 8/7/09 8:12 AM |
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sarahbelle
Little drummer boy
Member since 5/05 2377 total posts
Name:
Sarah
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
My MiIL has a 24 hour aide for her mother. She takes her mother and the aide to do grocery shopping each week and pays for her food. I am certain that my MIL is not cooking for her though. Providing food is part of her compensation. Definitely call the agency and find out from them directly.
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| Posted 8/7/09 8:21 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
We had two amazing aides for my grandparents....they ate in the house, but they basically cooked/cleaned/shopped and did everything for my grandparents. They were angels!
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| Posted 8/7/09 8:43 AM |
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IrishTracy
Believe!!
Member since 5/05 15167 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Glad to hear you got a replacement. Unfortunately, some home aide workers are not on the up & up. I've dealt with a couple of cases with my aunt. It's unreal how some act.
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| Posted 8/7/09 10:02 AM |
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heathergirl
Cocktail Time!
Member since 10/08 4978 total posts
Name:
American mouth
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
I am not a HHA but I find that very disconcerting and fishy. I would definitely call the HH company and ask if this is standard protocol 
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| Posted 8/7/09 11:14 AM |
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HeathKernandez
Our Ron is an awesome Ron
Member since 4/07 9091 total posts
Name:
baby fish mouth
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Posted by steph7308
Posted by browneyedgirl
it's not that my aunt is unwilling to let her eat with her, it's that this woman is saying she needs to cook specifically for HER!! my aunt wouldn't mind sharing a meal at all.
i dont have any experience but i can bet that your aunt dosnt have to cook specifically for her. its one thing for her to join her for dinner but to go out of her way to make her meals, no, that sounds crazy. who takes advantage of someone already going thru hell?
yeah especially if she's 85 and her husband is sick with cancer.. She has enough to worry about..
for your aunt
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| Posted 8/7/09 11:16 AM |
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!
Member since 10/05 20369 total posts
Name:
Jesss, duh.
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
My grandmother (82) has been on home healthcare since her knee replacement back in March.
The agency we use (I can give you the name if you want) has very strict guidelines. Aides are not allowed to ask for even a drink of water!! They have to bring their own food/drink/clothes. Are responsible for their own transportation.
They make random calls and do random house visits to ensure the aide is doing their job properly.
We are very happy with this agency and would gladly offer their information if you want it.
I'm sorry to hear about your uncle
eta - we never did 24 hour care either, always 12/12
Message edited 8/7/2009 12:47:46 PM.
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| Posted 8/7/09 12:46 PM |
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KartveliT
...
Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
Name:
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
Posted by browneyedgirl
does anyone know if you're responsible for feeding home health aides when they live in 24 hours a day with you? my uncle is dying of cancer and they just got a 24 hour home health aide. she's being very demanding--telling my great aunt (who's 85) she has to cook for her, buy her food and/or reimburse her for the food she has to buy.
to me this sounds weird because everyone has to eat so why is she responsible for buying/cooking her food? is she taking advantage of my elderly aunt?
anyone know?
Yes I do know. I have many MANY friends who work as home health aids in LI and NJ and families buy food for ALL of them or reimburse them for food they buy, they also buy gas for the car if they drive.
NO COOKING FOR THEM THOUGH. never heard of that
P. S.
MOST OF THEM WORK THOUGH AGENCIES, BUT SOME PRIVATE(WORD OF MOUTH)
Message edited 8/7/2009 1:20:30 PM.
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| Posted 8/7/09 1:19 PM |
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MrsFab
this is bliss.......
Member since 10/08 1234 total posts
Name:
Mb
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
My grandmother's aid does the cooking but we provide or reimburse her for all the food.
It sounds weird that she expects your aunt to cook just for her- I can see asking them to feed her or provide food but she should eat whatever they are eating
eta- we do buy certain things that we know the aid likes- like a certain creamer for her coffee, but for the most part its whatever my grandma is eating that she eats
Message edited 8/7/2009 1:54:11 PM.
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| Posted 8/7/09 1:53 PM |
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IluvBo
NICKY & EVIE
Member since 6/05 3321 total posts
Name:
Rose
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
my grandmother had a live in and she would brought he own food until my grandmother told her she didn't have to and that they would always eat together! what a blessing "Bianca" was to my grandmother. Bianca became family!
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| Posted 8/7/09 2:02 PM |
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
I would call the agency and find out.
My MIL had a live in aid DH and BIL used to buy the food for the house and she would cook for her and MIL if they weren't home. I'm not sure if those were the rules per se or if that is something they worked out over time. She would bring her own stuff as well.
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| Posted 8/7/09 9:45 PM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: home health aides---PLEASE help my aunt!!!
thanks everyone--this woman is a real piece of work. she's having my 85 year old aunt (who has diabetes) help her lift my uncle!!! my aunt is going to wind up in the hospital and can't physically do it. this is exactly why my aunt hired someone because she can't do it.
the new woman is being interviewed tomorrow. she's gotta be better than this nutcase.
i appreciate all the responses!
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| Posted 8/7/09 10:15 PM |
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