How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

I guess this is a question and also just a vent... I've been really upset over it.

Last night like a million people showed up at once including school aged children!! Everyone sanitized and most the children kept to themselves (you could tell they were instructed to not touch etc before coming) but some of them were just all over my house, the baby's stuff, and even KISSED the baby (that happened twice) and I feel like I want to die for letting it happen...

No one asked me if it was okay. The guests who did ask me before hand were told that we would prefer not to have school aged children here while the baby is so young. I was so overwhelmed with people everywhere, gift bags being shoved in my face to open (sorry if that sounds unappreciative, I like gifts of course, lol, but I was just exhausted at the time), and I was starving and just- well u guys know how it is 10 days into a new baby...

Anyway, I just sat there and shrunk into a panic. I feel like the worst mom in the world. Also, this is DH's family (there really aren't any kids in my own family so this is a non-issue with my side- except for 2 school aged cousins who live in florida and won't be visiting for over a month when they're on break) so I felt out of place saying something. But I am the mommy so I know it is NEVER out of place- I know it is more important to keep my baby safe than worry about people talking $hit etc... but jeeze they showed up at my door with kids and what do u say...

I guess in the future I have to tell them during the phone call, no kids. I was stupid for assuming people with their own kids would know better... It's bad enough that DH seems to have a cold and there's nothing we can really do about that short of crazy sanitizing.

Does anyone think I am overreacting? I tried to rationalize that if I had a previous lo in school there would be little we could do. U know just to calm my nerves that ds is going to have something horrible happen.

Thanks if u read this far.

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

I am way laid back, but I never kept anyone away from my DS. When my son was born, my DH's sisters were 15 and 13 and his brother was 11 and they were all holding DS the day he came home from the hospital.

I know many don't agree with me, but I feel like you can really get germs from anywhere.

I won't say you are overreacting b/c you are entitled to feel overwhelmed and annoyed b/c you just had a baby and guests are annoying no matter what

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

Well not one person visited me at all which made me feel kind of crappy like no one cared I had just given birth.

But on the other hand, i can see feeling totally overwhelmed by all the people.

I would just make sure everyone washes their hands (or uses purell) when they come in the house, and ask that no one who is sick comes over.

The baby could also be sleeping whenever anyone is there - or you need to breast feed (if you are doing that).

Don't worry, your baby will be fine! He is going to probably be exposed to more when you take him to the doctor's office than from the people in your house.

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

Posted by KateDevine

I am way laid back, but I never kept anyone away from my DS. When my son was born, my DH's sisters were 15 and 13 and his brother was 11 and they were all holding DS the day he came home from the hospital.

I know many don't agree with me, but I feel like you can really get germs from anywhere.

I won't say you are overreacting b/c you are entitled to feel overwhelmed and annoyed b/c you just had a baby and guests are annoying no matter what

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

I don't think you are over reacting.

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

I felt a lot like the OP did. In addition to my concern about germs, I felt that my husband, baby and I needed to spend time together just the 3 of us.

Do not feel funny saying anything to your husband's family. One day, very early on, my MIL just announced that she had made plans for an aunt from out of state to come and see the baby. I told her that b/c we weren't sleeping much and we were not in a routine yet, I didn't want this aunt to drive all the way here just to make me uncomfortable. I bet my MIL and the aunt do not even remember this now, so there was certainly no harm done in me saying no.

Message edited 3/7/2010 12:48:54 AM.

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

I don't think you were overreacting at all. When I first came home, my mom offered to cook us dinner. GREAT! She showed up with my dad, grandfather, sister, and brother! UGH... DH and I only wanted some sleep and now we were stuck entertaining a full house! It's very overwhelming and people just don't realize.

I wound up taking the baby upstairs with me and laid in bed nursing him. It was "rude" to leave the guests, but it was what I had to do for myself at the time.

As far as germs, you can only ask them to wash their hands AND offer hand sanitizer to make sure they got all the germs. Beyond that, you can limit exposure to kids by not letting them hold the baby.

Best of luck to you!

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

I felt like you but DH familiy is big w/ many kids. it was a free for all, I lost control LOL thank goodness baby never got sick. what can I do? I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings , I just kept the kids (tried to anyway) from climbing around the baby

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

Thx ladies. I definitely appreciate all the people who care enough to visit but yes it can be overwhelming at times- esp for a ftm who is just sooo anxious about things going wrong.

Re: How do/did you deal with all the guests/germs visiting ur newborn?

You are not overreacting! You have to do what you are comfortable with! Maybe keep Purell around and ask guests to use it first. I am not comfortable with school aged kids around DD either. I would just say-oh my ped said no kids around DS-blaming the ped is helpful!

And don't feel like the worst mommy-DD is a week old and turns out I am the walking germ this week! (DH was last week)