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How do I deal with this?

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shopaholic07
LIF Adult

Member since 5/08

1535 total posts

Name:

How do I deal with this?

At my last job, I worked with a manager who I did not see eye to eye with. She was aggressive towards me, not supportive of my work, and would give me a hard time about insignificant things. I cannot confirm this but I'm pretty sure her feedback caused me to lose my job. My DH wanted me to report her to HR but I never wanted to rock the boat - I just put up with how she treated me. This all happened at the end of '08.

I've been at my new job for four months. On Friday, I found out that my company hired my ex-manager's boyfriend. We are in the same department but he will not be overseeing my work/I won't be reporting to him. My DH says that I should go to HR as soon as he starts and just put it on the record that I used to work with this guy's girlfriend and that we did not get along, etc. He feels like I should do this just in case this guy starts causing me trouble, etc. I feel like the company won't care because the accusation isn't directly against the new employee. I'm hesitant about going to HR because I don't want them to think that I don't get along with my coworkers (I've had no problems thusfar). I also wouldn't even know how to word the whole situation!!

What do you think? Good idea to go to HR or no?

Posted 6/20/10 2:55 PM
 
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MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16353 total posts

Name:
Allison

Re: How do I deal with this?

To be honest, I would leave it alone for now. For all you know, this guy is nothing like his SO.

I would only go to HR if issues were to rise after he started.

Why give HR any reason to look negatively on someone when THEY haven't done anything to you yet. Especially if he has not even started the new position yet.

Message edited 6/20/2010 8:31:17 PM.

Posted 6/20/10 8:30 PM
 

DML
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

567 total posts

Name:

Re: How do I deal with this?

The boyfriend might not even draw the connection.

Posted 6/21/10 9:46 AM
 

Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A

Member since 7/05

32475 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: How do I deal with this?

I know you feel threatened but don't make something out of nothing.

Do your job and go straight ahead.

Posted 6/21/10 10:34 AM
 

MrsDrMatt
Live and RUN like a Ninja!

Member since 5/06

3104 total posts

Name:
MrsDrMatt

Re: How do I deal with this?

Honestly, I would laugh if someone told me this. It sounds too much like high school.

Good luck

Posted 6/21/10 12:44 PM
 

shopaholic07
LIF Adult

Member since 5/08

1535 total posts

Name:

Re: How do I deal with this?

Posted by DML

The boyfriend might not even draw the connection.



He also worked at my former employer.

Posted 6/21/10 2:13 PM
 

shopaholic07
LIF Adult

Member since 5/08

1535 total posts

Name:

Re: How do I deal with this?

Posted by MrsDrMatt

Honestly, I would laugh if someone told me this. It sounds too much like high school.

Good luck



Thanks - I'm just paranoid but I don't want anyone to come between me and my job.

Posted 6/21/10 2:14 PM
 

MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16353 total posts

Name:
Allison

Re: How do I deal with this?

Posted by shopaholic07

Posted by DML

The boyfriend might not even draw the connection.



He also worked at my former employer.



I still don't think it matters. Your employer could turn this around on you. I could see certain employers also thinking this is super-petty and immature (I don't want to sound harsh).

Go into work, do your job, and do NOT get personal. Be cordial, focus on work matters only. When you get personal, that's when drama like this ALWAYS happens.

ETA: Has this guy ever given you issues in the past? Or is it the girlfriend?

I still don't think you should say anything though. I also feel like part of being an adult and a professional is learning how to deal with certain personalities on our own, and only dealing with HR if it's an absolute necessity and threat which in this case, from the details you have given, does not sound like it.

Message edited 6/22/2010 6:55:16 AM.

Posted 6/22/10 6:51 AM
 
 

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