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I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

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anon
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Message edited 2/8/2007 12:42:24 PM.

Posted 7/17/06 3:45 PM
 
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preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by racheeeee

I just wanted to add my other philosophy...

He will only be a tiny baby for such a short time, and babies were made for holding! So hold him!

Signed girl with dead arm from holding baby.



I agree with what you are saying but by holding them all the time you will get nothing done at all...

Posted 7/17/06 3:51 PM
 

yankinmanc
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by bedda26

Posted by racheeeee

I just wanted to add my other philosophy...

He will only be a tiny baby for such a short time, and babies were made for holding! So hold him!

Signed girl with dead arm from holding baby.



I agree with what you are saying but by holding them all the time you will get nothing done at all...



I think having a baby and taking care of him, seeing to his needs etc is getting a hell of a lot done!! Housework can wait...it will be there when your husband gets home or when the baby goes to sleep at night!

These days though, I am out all day...I usually leave the house at around 10 am and get back at around 4...baby can nap in the pram if he wants. This way I tell my husband that I am knackered from looking after the baby all day! I find it works great. Meanwhile, I have been sitting on a blanket in the park all day chatting with my girlfriends! It works great!

eta, my baby doesn't take a pacifier either, he isn't a svcky baby. I think if the baby doesn't want one, he might not take one full stop.

Message edited 7/17/2006 3:54:57 PM.

Posted 7/17/06 3:54 PM
 

curley999
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

At that age I was holding DD all day long, she would only stay in the bouncy seat for 10-15 min max. At that time that was the best solution. She eventually grew out of it around 3-4 months. Try not to stress if other things dont get done, they are only this small for a short time! Good Luck!

Posted 7/17/06 3:56 PM
 

paulandles912
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Leslie

Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

I don't have advice but will share my experience with BF (9 weeks) and a non-sleeping, falling asleep at feedings, eating 13 times a day baby.

Andrew would rarely sleep period, day or night. I wasn't good at reading his cries at all -- so every cry to me was a hunger cry. I fed him 12 to 13 times a day -- but they only lasted 10 minutes at most b/c he would fall asleep.

I know and can appreciate the benefits of BFing but for us his situation (and in turn my sanity) improved when I changed over to formula. He slept better and ate well and I wasn't completely miserable.

Chat Icon Hope it gets easier for you.

Posted 7/17/06 3:58 PM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

It makes the feedings harder and that's my concern. him loosing weight...

Posted 7/17/06 3:58 PM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

I put him down 15 mins ago. He has closed his eyes but it's that light REM sleep. He had to cry his eyes out. I feel so bad...I just feel like I have no other option...

Posted 7/17/06 4:00 PM
 

JerseyMamaOf3
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

I held DS for probably the first 5-6 weeks. I would try to put him in the boucy seat but he didnt care for it. Once he could focus on an object he didnt mind being in it. Each day he was able to stay in the bouncy seat more. Now he loves the mobile and he has two "friends" on his bouncy they are rattles that snap in and he is grabbing them and kinda interacting with them, he is 3 months old. He also didnt like taking naps unless it was on me and I would let him have one long nap a day the other ones I would put him down for and if he lasted only 20 min. then so be it. Now he really doesnt take any naps at all only on the weekends I noticed when dh is around. He actually doesnt like to be held for too long so I kinda miss that time when he did like it. It will get easier. As far as the not gaining weight, I remember in a pp you said that he was gaining weight from one dr. visit to the next. If he is gaining weight even if it is at a slow pace I wouldnt be concerned. Every baby is so different that it is hard to compare. An example I can give you is my nephew is 7 months old and started to roll over at 6 months a friend of mine has a 2 month old and he started rolling over at 6 weeks. The crys I was able to distinguish once I knew what his tired cues were and I learned those from Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy child. He will rub his eyes and cry in a whiny voice. When he is hungry he will have an angry cry and absolutly nothing will soothe him except the food. I found out what his pain cry was when he got his first set of shots. You will learn all of this it just takes time.

Posted 7/17/06 4:39 PM
 

Calla
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by bedda26

I agree with what you are saying but by holding them all the time you will get nothing done at all...



What do you have to get done?

Posted 7/17/06 5:39 PM
 

joenick
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Are you using Avent bottles? Maybe the nipple size is too small. With my first son, I had no clue about the nipple stages. He would take 3 s*cks and fall asleep. I would put him down thinking he was full or not hungry and he would scream bloody murder. I'd pick him up again and offer the bottle. Again, the same thing would happen. A friend then told me to switch to stage 2 nipples (they have 2 holes instead of 1). She said the baby is working too hard to **** the formula and is knocking himself out. Sure as sh*t...as soon as I switched to that #2...he drank like a champ, gained weight and slept like a pro!!!
Give it a try...up it to the next stage in nipples!!!
Good luck!!
And...it does pass! Pretty soon you'll be onto bigger problems and will look back on this time as being child's play!Chat Icon
Take it from a mom of a 4.5 year old and 13 month old!Chat Icon

Posted 7/17/06 5:54 PM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by Calla

Posted by bedda26

I agree with what you are saying but by holding them all the time you will get nothing done at all...



What do you have to get done?



Things around the house...or taking a shower, I don't even have time for that sometimes...

Posted 7/17/06 7:32 PM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by joenick

Are you using Avent bottles? Maybe the nipple size is too small. With my first son, I had no clue about the nipple stages. He would take 3 s*cks and fall asleep. I would put him down thinking he was full or not hungry and he would scream bloody murder. I'd pick him up again and offer the bottle. Again, the same thing would happen. A friend then told me to switch to stage 2 nipples (they have 2 holes instead of 1). She said the baby is working too hard to **** the formula and is knocking himself out. Sure as sh*t...as soon as I switched to that #2...he drank like a champ, gained weight and slept like a pro!!!
Give it a try...up it to the next stage in nipples!!!
Good luck!!
And...it does pass! Pretty soon you'll be onto bigger problems and will look back on this time as being child's play!Chat Icon
Take it from a mom of a 4.5 year old and 13 month old!Chat Icon



Yes I use the Avent Bottles and I am already on Size 3 nipple. He still does not fall asleep! You would think that at night he would fall asleep so quickly but he doesn't. He has to Cry it out. As cruel as that sounds...

Posted 7/17/06 7:34 PM
 

Calla
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by bedda26

Things around the house...or taking a shower, I don't even have time for that sometimes...



I understand how tough everything seems right now, but really, those things around the house and even showers can wait. Do you have family nearby? Can you hire help? If not, buy a sling, you can still do things around the house and baby will still feel held. The showers will have to fit in when someone else is at home. (This is very, very, very common for the first few months. Its miserable, and no one talks about it, but lots of us went through this too!) You may want to read "The Happiest Baby on the Block" to help understand why your baby wants to be held, and to get some good suggestions on how to put him down. (Are you swaddling yet?)

Posted 7/17/06 9:01 PM
 

MrsJ
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

My ped said at 4 wks they are too young to let them cry it out. Katie didnt sleep much during the day - she still doesnt. Some babies just arent good nappers. But IMO I wouldnt let him cry it out at this age.

Posted 7/17/06 9:12 PM
 

3sisters
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Jeanette

Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

You are not alone. It is 5:00 o'clock in the morning and this is the third time I'm up with him. My son is six weeks also and I can't seem to get him on a sleeping schedule. I feel like I could have written your email. I'm glad I'm not alone. I feel like everyone I know has their baby sleeping from 10:00 to five, except for me. If anyone knows how to get a baby to sleep for longer at night, please let me know. During the day I can't keep him up. He also drinks more during the day than at night. I can'barely get three ounces in at night, but during the day he can go up to six ounces. If I try that at night, he throws it up.

Posted 7/18/06 5:00 AM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by 3sisters

You are not alone. It is 5:00 o'clock in the morning and this is the third time I'm up with him. My son is six weeks also and I can't seem to get him on a sleeping schedule. I feel like I could have written your email. I'm glad I'm not alone. I feel like everyone I know has their baby sleeping from 10:00 to five, except for me. If anyone knows how to get a baby to sleep for longer at night, please let me know. During the day I can't keep him up. He also drinks more during the day than at night. I can'barely get three ounces in at night, but during the day he can go up to six ounces. If I try that at night, he throws it up.



My problem is the opposite of yours. Mine won't sleep during the day. I'm afraid it's going to start interfering with his day feedings. Last night he fell asleep at 9pm and woke up at 2. He missed like 2 feedings! I felt like I was in a difficult position Do I let him sleep or wake him to eat??? Doctor said he shoud be getting 10-12 hours sleep within a 24 hour period. well he got about 11 because he slept from 9pm to 2am and then from 3 am to 7.

Posted 7/18/06 8:31 AM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

What is the normal ounces intake for a baby up to 3 months. Is it 20-24? Cuz I heard that after 2 months they shoud be having 32 ounces over a 24 hour period. My baby is nowhere near that.

Posted 7/18/06 8:42 AM
 

jrbaby
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

My DS is 9 weeksand takes between 25-30 oz in a day and is gaining weight well.

Posted 7/18/06 10:05 AM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Does the intake depend upon the size of the child?

Posted 7/18/06 11:06 AM
 

Marcie
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Quite honestly, I wouldn't be so concerned about how much your baby is eating.
If your baby is hungry - they will let you know. I wouldn't worry about the baby losing weight, as long as the baby is eating something, he will gain weight. About how much your doctor is telling you that he should eat - not every child is textbook.
Also, I am not sure about if you have air conditioning in your home, but if it is hotter in the home, he might not eat as much, my friends baby is like this.

And about your baby sleeping from 9-2 and then 3-7 Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I wish to God my child would - YOU ARE VERY LUCKY!!
Some babies wake every 3 hours just to eat or like mine did last night - she was up every 2 hours, just to be held to go back to sleep.

I guess what I am saying (like I said earlier) not every child is a textbook child, everyone is different. You baby likes to sleep at night and be up during the day. That is a good thing. I had weeks and weeks of Ali having her days and nights mixed up - it was not fun!!
Just think of it meaning your baby wants to be up - cause it doesn't want to miss anything during the day Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I know it is difficult, cause I go through some of the same things, but these are the challenges of being a mom. Trust me in a couple of months when your baby is sleeping through the night you will be LOVING IT!!!

Posted 7/18/06 11:06 AM
 

preciouslove
I love my DS!!!

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Blank

Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by Marcie

Quite honestly, I wouldn't be so concerned about how much your baby is eating.
If your baby is hungry - they will let you know. I wouldn't worry about the baby losing weight, as long as the baby is eating something, he will gain weight. About how much your doctor is telling you that he should eat - not every child is textbook.
Also, I am not sure about if you have air conditioning in your home, but if it is hotter in the home, he might not eat as much, my friends baby is like this.

And about your baby sleeping from 9-2 and then 3-7 Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I wish to God my child would - YOU ARE VERY LUCKY!!
Some babies wake every 3 hours just to eat or like mine did last night - she was up every 2 hours, just to be held to go back to sleep.

I guess what I am saying (like I said earlier) not every child is a textbook child, everyone is different. You baby likes to sleep at night and be up during the day. That is a good thing. I had weeks and weeks of Ali having her days and nights mixed up - it was not fun!!
Just think of it meaning your baby wants to be up - cause it doesn't want to miss anything during the day Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I know it is difficult, cause I go through some of the same things, but these are the challenges of being a mom. Trust me in a couple of months when your baby is sleeping through the night you will be LOVING IT!!!



But him staying up during the day makes him cranky at one point. He does start crying eventually. I guess it's hard now cuz all the toys and gadgets with music don't really entertain him much cuz he is still so young...

Posted 7/18/06 11:15 AM
 

Marcie
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by bedda26

Posted by Marcie

Quite honestly, I wouldn't be so concerned about how much your baby is eating.
If your baby is hungry - they will let you know. I wouldn't worry about the baby losing weight, as long as the baby is eating something, he will gain weight. About how much your doctor is telling you that he should eat - not every child is textbook.
Also, I am not sure about if you have air conditioning in your home, but if it is hotter in the home, he might not eat as much, my friends baby is like this.

And about your baby sleeping from 9-2 and then 3-7 Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I wish to God my child would - YOU ARE VERY LUCKY!!
Some babies wake every 3 hours just to eat or like mine did last night - she was up every 2 hours, just to be held to go back to sleep.

I guess what I am saying (like I said earlier) not every child is a textbook child, everyone is different. You baby likes to sleep at night and be up during the day. That is a good thing. I had weeks and weeks of Ali having her days and nights mixed up - it was not fun!!
Just think of it meaning your baby wants to be up - cause it doesn't want to miss anything during the day Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I know it is difficult, cause I go through some of the same things, but these are the challenges of being a mom. Trust me in a couple of months when your baby is sleeping through the night you will be LOVING IT!!!



But him staying up during the day makes him cranky at one point. He does start crying eventually. I guess it's hard now cuz all the toys and gadgets with music don't really entertain him much cuz he is still so young...



Ali gets like this too - we go for a walk in the stroller or if she is crying really bad and we can't get her to stop - we put her in her car seat and go for a ride. Most of the time, we just keep holding her and keep moving her around until she focuses on something to make her stop, sometimes I just thing she wants to be consoled

Posted 7/18/06 11:26 AM
 

Moehick
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Did you try carrying him around in a front carrier or sling? That way he is near you but you have your hands free to do whatever it is you need to do.

Message edited 7/18/2006 12:20:20 PM.

Posted 7/18/06 11:54 AM
 

preciouslove
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

No I haven't tried a carrier yet...I have the baby bjorn one...

So is 20-24 ounces in a 24 hour period acceptable? or does it have to be 24 ounces precisely. What do you ladies think?

I've even heard of 18-24 or is that for newborns?

Posted 7/18/06 12:03 PM
 

Marcie
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Re: I am at my wits end...don't know what to do anymore

Posted by bedda26

No I haven't tried a carrier yet...I have the baby bjorn one...

So is 20-24 ounces in a 24 hour period acceptable? or does it have to be 24 ounces precisely. What do you ladies think?

I've even heard of 18-24 or is that for newborns?



Maybe you should try calling another doctors office, besides the one you use to see what they say.
Honestly, in my opinion is doesn't matter.

Posted 7/18/06 12:20 PM
 
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