I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

So I spoke with my doctor yesterday and faxed him my charts since July and we talked about my "issue" (mid cycle bleeding)... he said from the info he had, and my history of PCOS (as a teen and early 20s - before going on Depo) that I am not ovulating and that's why I am bleeding... Great!

Now that I have that confirmed, on to the next step - Dr. Kreiner and East Coast Fertility... he said he's going to suggest Clomid/IUI Combo...

I have mixed thoughts about this... I am happy about the "confirmation" of what I have been thinking to be true from the beginning (PCOS). I'm happy that we will finally be able to have a greater chance as getting pregnant...

I'm p i s s e d about the fact that this had to take so long for him to figure out... 9 months of heartache when this is something that could've been tested for months ago (as said by GYN)...

But this "revelation" is a step in the right direction...

However, I feel like such a failure as a woman that I am not able to give DH a baby without this intervention... Honestly, I feel like the one job my body is supposed to do is failing me - and for what reason? I feel like I am letting him down and myself as well.

I am so angry that my mother/aunts/grandmothers/friends/etc. have all been able to have each and every one of their children without medical involvement... and they just don't understand the frustration and pain that I've (we've) felt over the last 9 months ... hopefully, this will change their minds and stop them from interjecting with "You need to just relax... You're doing it to yourself... if you don't calm down and not think about it - you're never going to get pregnant."

I'm sorry this is so long... I needed to get it off of my chest - I didn't sleep much last night just thinking about this.

Any suggestions or information about East Coast Fertility and Drs. Kreiner and Pena is much appreciated.

Thanks for "listening"...

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

i'm so sorry you're going through this. i don't really have any advice since i'm not TTC yet. like u said at least now u know what is going on.
just curious what made u think u had PCOS? what were ur symptoms?

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

oh, hon, here's some

I know what you mean. Every month that we didn't get pregnant I would think to myself, "What's wrong with me? Why can't I do this?" But we CANNOT think this way because we have NO control over it. You have made an important discovery in your TTC journey. Yes, the last 9 months were a PITA, but they got you to where you are now: knowledge in hand, ready to see your next doctor. I am so excited for you, this is the start of your road to a bfp!!

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

I'm sorry you are feeling frustrated. It sounds like you are on the right path now, though.

I had no idea before we started TTC what a rough road it could be....and how miserable it would make me most of the time.

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

Message edited 2/15/2011 2:59:11 PM.

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

Unfortunately, I know exactly how you feel. I have PCOS too & have had probs ttc because of it as well...I could have written parts of your post myself...you've got FM

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way. But please don't feel like a failure! If you're a failure, then so am I, and so is everyone on IF. And you KNOW that's not true.

You and DH are still going to have a child - and as they say... the end justifies the means!

Who cares how you get there? You'll still end up in the same place.

I honestly did not think twice about needing help getting pregnant - I just wanted to get that help ASAP so we could make a baby.

I know you must be feeling a million different emotions right now. IF is a very personal journey and we all react and feel differently about it. Are you sharing this all with your family?

To be honest, we haven't shared with ours. We think they would feel the same way yours does - that we just need to "relax" or whatever. We plan on telling them AFTER we get pregnant. That's just what is most comfortable for us.

If you ever need to talk, you can always FM me!

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

i also went to see Dr Pena for a consult and thats all it was a consult. I didnt go back. I just felt uncomfortable like i was stupid asking questions. I also have pcos and although he didnt treat me i cant comment on success rates. I am seeing RSofNY in SB and see dr stelling and cain there. I havnt had a problem there. they seem very proactive and i they are really nice.
I also went to LI IVF and saw Dr Brenner. From what i understand hes a great dr, but he said he wanted me to go natural cycles with iui for 5 -6 months.. I dont want to do that again.. I already did that and dont want to start all over. Im on clomid, metformin and do the ovidrel shot. He said my metformin and clomid can be overkill and maybe one will work without the other.. I say give me anything and everythigng that will make me O!!! so im sticking with RS of NY

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

first of all,
now, I dont want you to think you are a failure...You are NOT! You are doing what you have to do to become a mommy. Good luck...sounds like you are taking the first steps to that goal!

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

aww you are not a failure; sometimes things just need to be jumpstarted... im sure you will have luck with the ttc process soon now that you know what the problem is and you have people who know what they are doing to help you.. praying that you get your BFP soon and we are always here to vent to!!!

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

I am sorry you are going through this.

Please don't feel like a failure!!! I know it's hard but try not to. Unfortunately for some of us, the TTC journey takes longer. But I am sure you will have a BFP soon. We are all here for you... so vent away

Re: I don't know what to think... *kinda long*

i am so sorry .. dont be so hard on yourself... everything will be okay.. stay strong!!


ETS... spelling

Message edited 10/28/2008 1:29:28 PM.